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How do I tell my dad I don't wanna live with him

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  • How do I tell my dad I don't wanna live with him

    Hi I'm ***(13) My parents are divorced and my dad is really mean to me. He randomly yells at me for thing he or my sister does,and hes really manipulative. He is sometimes violent and grabs my arms leaving red marks when he's mad, and I think he enjoys watching me in pain, because when I cry he smiles and yells louder and grips tighter.I talked to my mom about his behavior, and my dad has previously had drinking problems so I am going to observe his drinking. If he drinks to much I'm going to move to my mom's. My mom said that she was going to talk to my dad and wasn't going to mention me, but since it's about me and my dad I'm part of it so I am going to suck it up and be there with my mom if we end up having that conversation. But I don't know what to say when the time comes. I Know that I'm going to tell him to choose me or alcohol and that I don't wanna see him if he doesn't quit, but I don't know how:/ And what if he's not drinking and just crazy ,then what do I do , because I'm genuinely scared to go home.
    Last edited by ccsmod0; 03-27-2022, 01:57 AM.

  • #2
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed by your dad. We’re sorry you’re going through this. It takes a lot of bravery to reach out for help, and we're glad you felt comfortable telling your mom about your experience. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

    Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

    If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best.

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe,

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


    • #3
      Hi, so I don't really know how to start this but, I'm 13, almost 14 and I've wanted to run away since I was 7, or 8. So have my siblings, but my older sister is too scared, and she thinks we should be grateful for what we have and stuff, my younger sister idk. My dad doesn't care about any of us he is a narcissist, he only cares about his siblings who just lay at home watching tv all day, while he sends most of our money to them. Also he never respects us, when he's around we can't be ourselves most of the time in the mornings i camp in the bathroom untill both my parents leave and then come out.If we try to say what we think, like we dont like the way he treats us, he will loose it, he'll get his belt beat us, etc. this one time so every morning he's like make your bed except in a mean voice, and then one day my younger sister said he doesn't ever make his bed why should we, she said it when our mom was around and she told our dad and he started beating all three of us with is belt and, was trying to break our fingers ( which he does all the time if we dont obey). He treats us like he's some god and we're dirt. My mom even complains about how he treats her, but no matter what she wont divorce him. And then she's always telling me things like, I'm fat, Im apparently arrogant because I speak up for myself, shes nosy, and basically my entire life I've been abused emotionally, my younger sister is the favorite though she might want too runaway too. My parents are only home on sunday, and Sunday's are the worst. The days and times my parents aren't home Im fine with everything. This stuff probably has alot of grammatical errors, but its cause im rushing. I left out a lot of stuff that happened but yeah. Would I be able to run away, with my younger sister, Im 13 almost 14, and she's 10? Also could you please also post your response at this email address, because I probably wont check back on this website, idk if I will.


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello, thank you for reaching out to us. Sorry to hear that your dad is being verbally and physically abusive to you and your family. It sounds like your mom is aware of this problematic behavior, but isn’t able to change it. Your sisters are lucky that they have such a caring sibling looking out for them.

        Unfortunately, if you do runaway, your dad does have the option to file a runaway report with the police, and the police could force you to return home. Although running away isn’t a crime, harboring a runaway is a misdemeanor. Something to think about for the person you might stay with. We are not legal experts here, so if you would like to speak to someone about how your local police handle runaway cases, you could call your local police department and ask hypothetically how they would respond.

        It does sound like there is some serious physical abuse going on. We can also help you file an abuse report if you call us at 1-800-786-2929.

        There’s a lot to think about when leaving home. If you feel like you would benefit from talking to someone about your specific situation, we encourage you to call or chat us through this website so that we can better listen and help. We work best when we can have a conversation with you. We truly hope to hear from you soon.

    • #4
      That must of suck you should call someone for help


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for your response to another user’s post. That is certainly one option they could take! There might be others worth exploring as well. For anyone experiencing any difficulties or challenges, the National Runaway Safeline encourages youth to reach out to our 24/7 crisis support line either by phone or chat for immediate services.
        Thank you, NRS
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