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Boyfriend's Abusive Mother

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  • Boyfriend's Abusive Mother

    Hi, I'm 17 and my boyfriend is as well. I want him to get away from his mother ASAP because it's gotten out of hand at this point. He has ADHD and his mother doesn't seem to understand how to be patient with her own son. His mother does not want to take care of him and takes money from his weekly pay every time he gets his check for the money HE worked for. She always gets mad and yells at him as soon as he gets home (for nothing of course). This morning he was already crying because his mother told him he has to pay for everything he needs himself, and because he was crying and couldn't talk BECAUSE he was crying, she threatened to take away his phone (which is the only way he can communicate with me).Its gotten worse now since even before we started going out, since his grades weren't doing so good. Now he's working a job his mother forced him into, she wants him to pay for everything he needs (food, clothes, school supplies, etc.), and expects him to cover all those things when she's taking money from him every week he gets money from his job. His only hope right now is his grandmother who he will soon talk to her about the situation today, but if she refuses to take him away from her or just take him back to his mother (like everyone else in his family did) then he'll end up with no money, no education, and become homeless. He's only 17 and is only now becoming a senior. I want to help him and my mother wants him to call the number for this safeline, but I don't want to do something that doesn't guarantee his safety from his own mother.

  • #2
    Hi there,

    Thank you for contacting us here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We are so sorry that your boyfriend is having to go through this extremely difficult situation at home. It's great you recognize that the way his mom is treating him is not okay and we appreciate you for reaching out for him to try to explore his options. We are here to support him to the best of our ability.

    It sounds like there are some neglectful behaviors that you've talked about, one option he would have is to file an abuse report against his mom to see if Child Protective Services can come and investigate the home. We would be happy to do this for you if you call our number. As for going with his grandmother, we just want to let you guys know that without his mom's permission to leave, she would be able to file a runaway report as long as he is a minor. If he does end up without secure housing, we would also be happy to look for shelters or Transitional Living Programs nearby. In terms of mental health support, please let him know he can call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). They are a national organization that specializes in providing confidential, 24/7 mental health services.

    As we mentioned previously, if he would like to talk more about the situation, explore these options, or find other resources, we are here. NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance, so if you would like to talk more, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); (click on the chat button). If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe and take care,
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)


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