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My mom is has narcissistic what she does considered abuse?

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  • My mom is has narcissistic what she does considered abuse?

    I've been tolerating my Narcissistic mom (NMOM) and Enabler dad (EDAD) for years now , I'm 15 and since I was 11 I've started to notice how abusive they are?...

    A year ago my mom started banging on the door while I was bathing while my phone was outside , she wanted me to come out asap and let her check my phone. I couldn't understand why and I didn't give her the password bc privacy and I had alot of chats with my friends about mental health and stuff. I didn't know why she was so angry and she physically hit me and even wanted to check my google history, let me just make it clear my google history is full of reddit nparent stuff a bunch of study stuff like chem etcetc.

    Then recently three days ago, I was in my room changing and I forgot to lock the door, my phone was on the table beside me and she got so mad she wanted to check it? I took it and ran to the other room to delete my chats and pictures because once she saw a post of me wearing a bandana top and she called me a prostitute.

    Anyways this time she checked my phone and saw a picture of me in a fitting dress that came right above my knee and a crop top and she made comments such as:
    1. You look like a whore
    2. You look like a slut
    3. You look like a prostitute
    4. You look like you're asking for it
    5. I will not be surprised if anything happens to you.

    I would like to clarify that I actually live in one of the most safest country and people wear whatever they want. Kids my age dress way better than me because their parents give them freedom to do so. My mom doesn't even let me wear sleeveless clothing but she wears sleeveless clothing all the time?... But ever since she checked my phone she doesn't let me close my door when I'm changing and doesn't let me have my phone after 11pm

    Funny how parents think taking away their child's phone fix things, if anything they become more secretive and sneaky, she thinks I don't have Instagram and other chat-apps I use to talk to my friends aren't on my laptop but...when you're taking away my privacy and freedom, ofcourse it's going to be on my laptop lol. Oh and my country is kind of covid-free and we get to go out , but because of my clothing that's apparently making me look like a "whore" I'm not allowed to go anywhere bc I'm grounded for no valid reason.

    I'm the second child and she DOES NOT and HAS NEVER treated my sister like this... I'm so scared of my mom lol I can't wait to move out one day. It's literal hell here.

    I just want to runaway lol. Any advice on anything I can do to get my full privacy and freedom back or like get out of here..? I'm so terrified here

    current update: She took my phone away for good and made her look like the victim, I'M SICK OF IT I'M SO FED UP OF IT. She said future employees will see those pictures and more stuff like how I have no dignity or self respect.

    Is it just me or parent never have a reason to NOT trust their child, if you don't trust someone there must be a reason right?...especially if it is your child

    I hate how parents blow up on you and slowly,usually within minutes, suddenly cheer up and try to befriend you again

    It’s so ********ed up. One minute you’re really destroying your kids and the next you’re being all nice and asking if they want anything. Psychological torture, always puts me on edge.
    Also I am posting this from my laptop and I really need my phone back, because now I cannot even go to the store or downstairs.

  • #2
    Hey there!

    Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step.

    It sounds like things between you and your mom are pretty rocky right now, and we're sorry to hear that. And while we can't say if what you're experiencing would be considered abuse (because we're based in another country and aren't familiar with the laws in your country), we do think it's important to pay attention to what you're experiencing and how it makes you feel. If you don't like being treated that way, that's enough--whether it's considered abuse or not.

    If you'd like some additional support as far as how to deal with what's going on at home, how you're not feeling safe, or some of those thoughts around running away, it might make more sense for you to connect with a local organization who are a bit more familiar with how things work in your country. That said, you might be able to connect with an organization in your area by visiting You can click on "Find a Child Helpline" right at the top of the page, and then search for your country from there.

    We hope that you're able to find the help that you're looking for.

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


    • #3
      I actually need to go to the stationary store to get some things regarding school and she does not even allow me to do that , I have no idea how to survive in this household I feel so caged


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); (click on the chat button).
        If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
        We hope to hear from you soon.
        Be safe,
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