I just can't anymore.

[Guest]

I'm only 12 years old, my mother hates me due to the fact I got the law involved with our family because of truancy. She said, and I quote "Stop making everyone pay for your bull********" I asked to move in with my father. He doesn't even want to let me leave here. My mother verbally abuses me and my younger sibling I cannot talk to her without us arguing. I went through quite a bit of s*xual abuse virtually and she thinks i'm not doing my work because i'm lazy as hell, but i'm exhausted. I've been through so much and I just want to leave this place, I want to live with my grandparents but there is no court order letting me. I am very close to committing at age 12. I just can't do this anymore.

[ccsmod5]

Hi there,
It sounds like home can become an overwhelming place to be, we’re sorry you’ve had to endure such treatment. You mentioned experiencing emotional abuse which may be reportable against your mother. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. You could also talk to them about the history of sexual abuse, even if it was a long time ago. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made. Child Help USA is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.
Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe and stay strong,
NRS