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My life is just one big screw up. Ever since I was five, I've had to suffer torment, from both my peers and my family. But things really started getting bad about two years ago. I tried to tell a good friend at camp how my parents had a habit of making me lie down on a bed and swatting me with a wooden paddle across the thighs really hard whenever I misbehaved. When services were called though, my parents got hysterical and went crazy over getting a lawyer and all that crap. They basically told the lawyer that they had never done any of the stuff I mentioned and the lawyer dismissed them, telling them they were good parents. Things started up again a year later when I got depressed and sought my conseuler for advice. When she called my parents, though, they again got angry at me for telling 'strangers' stuff that I shouldn't be telling them. The pressures of school, friends not caring about me, and my parents acting like this made me want to kill myself. One day, I got so depressed and suicidal that my conseluer sent me to a hospital w/o my parents' permission. After I got out, they started going down on me even harder, calling me 'crazy' because I was depressed.
My mom is constantly telling me that she wants me to feel better, but she's not letting me get any outside help. She just wants me to get better right away because if I even look depressed to her she says I'm a crazy lunatic who will end up in a mental place for the rest of my life. She constantly questions me, "Are you depressed?" If I say yes, then she says, "No, you're not depressed, depressed people are crazy!!" I've tried turning towards my dad for support but he just ignores my feelings completely. I almost cry in front of him and he keeps playing his game, saying, "Crying's not going to help you. Leave and don't come back till you're no longer depressed." Or he would just say something like, "Oh, it's not your depression again, isn't it?" The way he responds makes me never want to be around him, EVER.
Then, to make things even worse, in order to fix my 'problem', my parents decided to have our family relocate to a town 500 miles away. I've already had enough problems in my life and all I want to happen is for life to go back to the way it was. My mom's reason for moving is because she thinks the consleuers here who are trying to help and support me are ‘bothering’ me. She says I’m now a victim in their system and that there was no way I could ever live a normal life or have a normal future if I stay in my hometown. And my dad knew that if he bought a new house, we’d be poor, but like a fool, he bought the house anyway cuz he also thought that the whole reason for moving was my fault. It’s like he’s saying I never should’ve gotten depressed or gotten help for my problems. Anytime I write anything to anyone or talk with anyone on the phone, my mom has to be right there, making crazy faces whenever I even talk about my casual life to my friends. I wish we never moved: I have no friends, we all lay around the house all day, and the only place we go to eat are fast food joints. All with them reminding me of my flaws 24/7.
I’m running away first thing in the morning. My mom thinks I’m a mental problem, my dad couldn’t care less about what happens to me or my relationships with my friends and I wanna die. Nobody really cares much for me anyway: I’m not anyone’s best friend, no boyfriend, everyone would rather be with anyone else but me. But I’d rather be anywhere than with a mother who thinks her child is nothing more than a crazy lunatic.
My mom is constantly telling me that she wants me to feel better, but she's not letting me get any outside help. She just wants me to get better right away because if I even look depressed to her she says I'm a crazy lunatic who will end up in a mental place for the rest of my life. She constantly questions me, "Are you depressed?" If I say yes, then she says, "No, you're not depressed, depressed people are crazy!!" I've tried turning towards my dad for support but he just ignores my feelings completely. I almost cry in front of him and he keeps playing his game, saying, "Crying's not going to help you. Leave and don't come back till you're no longer depressed." Or he would just say something like, "Oh, it's not your depression again, isn't it?" The way he responds makes me never want to be around him, EVER.
Then, to make things even worse, in order to fix my 'problem', my parents decided to have our family relocate to a town 500 miles away. I've already had enough problems in my life and all I want to happen is for life to go back to the way it was. My mom's reason for moving is because she thinks the consleuers here who are trying to help and support me are ‘bothering’ me. She says I’m now a victim in their system and that there was no way I could ever live a normal life or have a normal future if I stay in my hometown. And my dad knew that if he bought a new house, we’d be poor, but like a fool, he bought the house anyway cuz he also thought that the whole reason for moving was my fault. It’s like he’s saying I never should’ve gotten depressed or gotten help for my problems. Anytime I write anything to anyone or talk with anyone on the phone, my mom has to be right there, making crazy faces whenever I even talk about my casual life to my friends. I wish we never moved: I have no friends, we all lay around the house all day, and the only place we go to eat are fast food joints. All with them reminding me of my flaws 24/7.
I’m running away first thing in the morning. My mom thinks I’m a mental problem, my dad couldn’t care less about what happens to me or my relationships with my friends and I wanna die. Nobody really cares much for me anyway: I’m not anyone’s best friend, no boyfriend, everyone would rather be with anyone else but me. But I’d rather be anywhere than with a mother who thinks her child is nothing more than a crazy lunatic.
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