Hey there. Thanks for contacting us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step. It sounds like you've been having a tough time with your mom, and we're sorry to hear that. You mentioned that you're a young adult, but we're not quite sure if that means you're over the age of 18 or not. For the purposes of our response, we're going to assume that you're under 18 and unable to leave home at the moment due to your age.
Based on what you've described, it's understandable that you might be feeling frustrated. As we get older, we almost naturally expect to start having more and more independence in who we are and what we're allowed to do, especially if that's what we see happening with our friends and other young people around us. But, that's not always the case, and those feelings of restriction can be really tough. If you haven't done so already, it might be a good idea to try and have a conversation with mom about how you're feeling. Perhaps you can address a few of your main areas of concern, and really try to talk them through. Aiming to understand why she's being so restrictive on them might be helpful in trying to show her that you're both equipped and responsible enough to handle whatever it is. Another option might be to talk with a therapist. Not only can they hear you out and provide direct support to you, but they can also help facilitate some of those more challenging conversations with your mom.
You indicated in your post that your mom has been verbally abusive to you, but has also slapped you. If that's an issue or you otherwise feel unsafe, filing an abuse report with Child Protective Services (CPS) might be an option for you as well. Once an abuse report is filed, a CPS worker investigates to learn more about what's going on at home, striving to ensure the safety and wellbeing of any children who live in the home. While sometimes this means that children are then removed from the home, more often than not, CPS will try and put supports in place and provide resources for the family to try and ensure that whatever is happening in the home is addressed. If filing a report with CPS is something that you'd like to do, you can file a report yourself by calling your local CPS agency. You can also disclose any abuse to a safe person at school, like a teacher or a social worker. They're considered Mandated Reporters and will file a report on your behalf. You're also welcome to contact us here at NRS and we can file a report for you, or with you--whatever you're most comfortable with.
If you'd like to talk in more detail about what's going on at home or to learn more about filing an abuse report, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chatting with us live at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.
Take care.
NRS
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Help - I need to escape my narcissistic religious parents
Help me please. My mother and father both fight on a regular basis and my mother tries to control every aspect of my life - where I go to school and what I study, what I wear, who my friends are, how I spend my money, where I work, who I can date,how much I can eat, etc. Mind you, I'm a young adult. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of my own needs and know what I want, but my mother thinks she knows exactly what I need/want and never asks me if I'm ok with it. She also verbally abuses me, tells me I'm annoying, if I'm not sick of myself yet, she slaps me, breaks my doors, takes my things (I had a suitcase full of things to move out, she put them all back without my permission). She also isolates me from my friends and community. She calls me a demon one day and then cooks me breakfast and calls me a princess the next. My father says there's something wrong with me and is emotionally unavailable and continues to escape any interaction with me. I honestly don't know what to do at this point.
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