How can I leave my family at 13

[Guest]

Im f 13 and ever since I was born my life has been really hard. I really love my mom but she just can't handle my sister, my sister is supposedly bipolar or autistic but in general is just a terrible person. Everyday I have to deal with her screaming at everyone and everything she's broken many things and has cost us lots of money and even my step father job. She would often beat me and I couldn't do anything back or even protect myself because my parents would defend her because she "mentally ill". My mother always has mental break downs over almost everything and cant handle her emotions well, but I don't complain because she's had a harder life than I could ever imagine. My father's always set extremely high expectations and I was never good enough for him. I've recently started physically developing and my father has been acting weird. He's started to touch me a lot (i.e. hugs, kisses, etc.) it was weird to me because he knows that I sensitive to touch and he only started doing all this recently. He'd hold me by my waste and call me his "little girl" and he's never done anything like this before. One day I fell asleep on the couch and woke up with him lying next to me with his hand on my breast. I have no friends or family that I can escape to, and I can't put up with them anymore. The only reason I haven't told anyone about this is because Im scared my mom wont believe me or that it will make things harder for her. I really really need help ever since I've been stuck at home with the pandemic I've felt empty and have started cutting and starving myself.They never have time for me and I've mentally dying. I don't need therapy I need them to go away things will never be functional. I really don't want to call CPS or anything because I don't want anything bad to happen to my mom, but I can't find any ways out. I really need help.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS