No announcement yet.

When can I choose to live with the other parent, and possibly grandparents?

  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • When can I choose to live with the other parent, and possibly grandparents?

    From when I was like 7 up until a few years back, 12, my mother and stepfather were very abusive. It was like really bad. I'm 14 in October for reference. When I was twelve I ran away to my grandparents a few miles away. Some stuff stopped but then it resumed. A little after my stepdad left for his job in Hawaii. We live in Alabama. Some stuff happened that I never heard about until now happened. He cheated or something and she got mad and overdosed. She told us t(my stepbrother and stepsister) to get our grandparents to come get us, which is strange because we have only gone over there about two times since we moved here in 2017. So we did and some cops were outside and we didn't think much of it. They busted the door down and we left. We then lived with our grandparents for half a year. 5 and a half months exactly. A bunch of legal stuff happened and my mom was let out during those five months. She would visit with us and cause ruckus arguing with my grandmother. Always buying us stuff to try and get us to like her more than my grandparents. My parents and my grandparents both knew I wanted to stay over at my grandparents house. My grandparents tried to help and I told the counselor at school and this lady came by making sure my grandparents weren't drug addicts or anything and I told her. My grandparents really tried. I forgot to mention I lived with them from when I was just born to about 5 and then moved away. My mom was too busy doing drugs probably so she just dropped me off over there. I would stay for months. So anyways my grandparents tried to help get me to stay. My stepdad came home and he started having issues too with us being at their house. I did some risky stuff involving suicidal thoughts but nothing happened in those five months. Eventually they went to court without me and all the sudden my parents were coming to take us back home. My grandma informed me they couldn't do anything cause there was no proof and they aren't allowed to take me word for it without proof. So we went home. This happened in sixth grade which caused me to almost fail. My grandparents helped me back up though. They haven't done anything bad like that since. Ive been living here since and they only argue occasionally. We go over to my grandparents every other weekend if not every weekend. We recently have had notice we're being kicked out of our house because we're renting and the owner can kick us out at any time. So we have a month to get out. Earlier I told her I wanted to live with my grandparents. She said haha no and I left it at that because I don't feel like dealing with them. They are still mean people minus the former abuse. Yelling a lot. Just a few minutes ago I told my real father over the phone we're moving and I considered living with my grandparents. "You would pick my own mother than me to live with what did I do to you waaah wah wah let me whine about how your mother took you away I'm the victim waaaaah" he replied. Now I'm genuinely curious when I can if I can request to live with my grandparents. Both sets of my parents say frick that. So that not an option. Perhaps I could set something up with officials. When can I chose which parent to live with? Can I chose my grandparents? What can I do to achieve my goal of living with my grandparents? What can my grandparents do? What age can I do anything? Thank you so much

  • #2
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. Any abuse of any kind is not okay. You can always reach out to Childhelp. They can help provide support and answer any questions you may have. Their number is 1800-422-4453. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
    While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)


    Previously entered content was automatically saved. Restore or Discard.
    Insert: Thumbnail Small Medium Large Fullsize Remove