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if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

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  • I'm 15 and I've been considering running away for a while now . My step verbal abuses me all the time and today it got physical bc I was fed up with everything he says to me . He calls me a worthless piece of ******** or a punk little kid who's going to jail or stuff like that all the time and I'm done I've been dealing with it for a couple years now.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      You do not deserve to be verbally abused and we are glad you reached out to us. Reaching out for help and thinking through big decisions like leaving home can be really difficult and take a lot of strength. Before you do leave, if you ever feel in immediate danger you can always call 911. If you would like to talk with someone about the verbal abuse Child Help has a national Child Abuse Hotline available at 1-800-422-4453.
      It sounds like you have be considering running away for a while now. We are not legal experts and while it is not illegal to runaway, if you are a minor (under 18 in most states) and are found by the police if a runaway report is filed, the people you are staying with could be charged with harboring a runaway. If you have more legal questions you can always call us at our 24/7 hotline 1-800-786-2929 or call your non-emergency police number.
      Before you leave it could be helpful to think about where you will stay and how long you can stay there, how you will support yourself, and how you will get to and from school if you plan to stay in school. If you need help thinking through these additional questions or would like help finding resources we are available 24/7 and are always here to help.
      Do not hesitate to call.
      Good luck,
      NRS

  • Hi ,I'm 17 and I'm having a lot of problems at home with my mother .She tells me to do whatever i want ,To leave the house or pay rent .She doesn't treat me like her daughter .She defends her husband then her kids .There was an incident at home ,and i was shaking ,crying and left .I was going to work but they didnt need me so i went to my aunts .I've been with my aunt and my mom still called the cops because she just likes getting me into problems .She wants to send me to JDC ,but i dont want to go there ,I'm not a bad kid ,I just have so much anger towards my mom .What can I do ?Can i actually go to Juvenile detention center ?What can I do with my mon wheb she hits me and is unfair .Doesnt support me only with shelter thats it other than that I'm on my own .

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    • ccsmod1
      ccsmod1 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,

      Thanks so much for reaching out. We are sorry to hear about your problems with your mom. It sounds like you feel very hurt by her treating you this way. You don't deserve to be hit or treated unfairly. You have a right to file a child abuse report with CPS if you think you are being abused or neglected. If you are thinking about reporting, we can help talk you through the process and decide if that is the best plan for you. Your mom has threatened to put you in juvenile detention. That sounds very scary. We are not legal experts, however we can say that usually JDC is basically like jail or prison, meaning you have to be charged with a crime and sentenced in order to go there. Running away to your aunts house is not a crime, it is considered a "status offense," which is not something you wind up in jail over. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. If you need to talk through your options, we are happy to help you come up with a plan to stay safe. Don't hesitate to give us a call any time. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

  • So ill be 18 in a month. Can i leave my house or do i physically have to wait a month to leave.

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    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello, Thank you for taking the time to write to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you want to know if you can leave you home one month before becoming 18. This is a good question and while we are not legal experts to our knowledge the age of majority in most states it 18. This means that until the day you are 18 you have to live where your parents want you to. If you do leave home before then your parents do have the right to file a runaway report but since you are so close to being 18 it would at that point be up to the police officers discretion if they want to pursue looking for you. If you want to know more about how runaway reports are carried out you can try contacting your local non-emergency police.
      Again, thank you for contacting us. It definably sounds like you are trying to do your best with that is going on. If you feel comfortable you are more than welcome to give us a call anytime 1-800-786-2929

  • Hi I'm 17 and i turn 18 in six months, what would happen if I ran away? I really dont want to live here anymore. Please reply

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    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      We are glad you reached out, it sounds like things are difficult at home and you don’t want to live there anymore. It’s good you are gathering information to help you in making a decision on whether to leave or not, which can be a tough decision to make.

      While we are not legal experts, we can speak generally on your situation. Generally speaking, in the United States youth have to be 18 years old to leave home without being considered a runaway. At age 17, you’d still be considered a minor and your legal guardians or parents would have the ability to file a runaway report with the police. Running away is a status offence, meaning it is illegal to because of age, but you cannot be arrested or charged for a status offence. The police would return you home to your legal guardians. One thing to keep in mind is whoever runaway youth stay with could be arrested for harboring a runaway. The best way to determine how your local police would react would be to call their non-emergency number and speak generally on your situation.
      Leaving home can be a difficult decision to make, here are some questions you can ask yourself to help in staying safe:

      • Do I have a place to stay?
      • What about school? Would I continue to get an education?
      • Am I going to be gone awhile or coming back in a few days?
      • What would I do for money? Shelter? Food? Transportation?
      • Who can I depend on if I leave home?
      • Do I have a safe, solid plan?
      • What is my plan b in case my first plan doesn’t work?
      • What have I done to make things better at home?
      • What can I do to make things better at home?
      • Who have I reached out to make things better at home?

      We are here to support you, and if you would like to talk more in depth about your situation we are available to talk 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY, or via online chat at 1800runaway.org. You can always remain confidential.

      Best,
      ~NRS

  • I'm 14 and things have been really rough at my home for a while now. My parents are always fighting, and even when they're having a normal conversation they end up yelling at each other. My mom used to be an alcoholic, and there was a lot of verbal abuse going on at the time, and some of my fear and anxiety from that abuse is coming back now that things are getting more rocky. I just feel like it's really not the best place for me to be, because all i feel at home is anxiety. And with my big end of grade tests coming up, being at home won't be ideal. My friend said I can come to her house whenever I need to cool off or something, and I've been really thinking about it. I just wanted to know if her parents could get in legal trouble if my parents call the cops or something. I'm not going to just run away if they'll get into some legal trouble, because they have enough instability in their family as it is.

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello, Thank you for taking the time to write to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you feel as if your home is a very toxic environment for you due to the constant fighting. From what you have mentioned being home causes you a lot of anxiety and it would do you some good to spend some time away from home every once in a while.
      It is understandable that you would want to go to your friend’s house and cool off but to our knowledge the age of majority is 18. This means that their guardians are legally responsible for them. So the parent is required by law to provide for the youth (food, shelter, school, etc.) If they fail to do so then they can face legal consequences. This also means that the youth cannot live anywhere else without parents’ consent. . If you do leave home without permission your guardian does have the right to file a runaway report. Running away is not a crime it is a status offence (something that only a minor can get in trouble for: truancy, buying cigarettes, etc.) this means that if you have any interaction with the police they will simply return you home. On the other hand the people that you are found to be staying with could face legal consequences that vary depending on your state. You can find out more about how runaway’s reports are carried out by contacting your local police department. If you would like we could contact your local non-emergency number for you or with you. Just give us a call and one of our trained liners would be happy to assist you.
      You sound like a really considerate friend to be thinking about your friend’s family and their well-being while you are enduring your own issues. We hope this information helps and you are able to get everything that you want. IF you feel comfortable please give us a call anytime 1-800 786-2929.
      Best,
      NRS

  • I have a question. I wanna run away.. I'm 16 and there is so much crap going on in my family that I emotionally and physically can't take it. I know my parents will call the cops and make me out to be a runaway. I just wanna go stay with a friend until I know everything at my house has calmed down but I'm scared that if I runaway that they could loose my nephew because he is staying with us and my parents are kinda the guardian of him but the state has juristiction over him... I know they will hate me forever if they loose him. Would that be possible?

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      First of all, thanks for reaching out! It’s hard to deal with anything when it’s heavy on you emotionally and physically – and you’re having to deal not only with your own situation but also with your nephew’s one, that’s tough.

      You’re right that if you run they can report you; it doesn’t give you a criminal record, but it might make it hard for them to keep custody of your nephew. And if they find out where you are, they can have the Police go get you, and whoever is helping you could get in trouble for “harboring a minor without parental consent,” which is considered a crime… But you also need to think about yourself, and make sure that you’re safe and in a healthy environment!

      It would be better if they agree with you going to a friend’s place or a relative’s house, like “taking a break” even if just for some time. Do you think they might agree? If you get their approval it certainly makes it easier, and it would also be good for them in regards to your nephew.

      In case it may help, you can someone with you when you talk to them about this idea, for example another adult that you trust and that they respect – to help keep things objective, and make them see things from your perspective. Do you think that could work?

      Running away can be complicated, especially because you have to survive out there in some way. Please feel free to call us at 1-800-runaway 24/7, or reach us by chat, if you want to talk about it further, ok? We’re here to listen and to help you out.

      Hopefully things can get a little better at home if they can see things your way… Be strong in the meantime!

  • I'm turning 16 in two years... and my mom has already given me permission to get married at 16 if I'm married can I runaway without having the cops called on me?

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,
      Thank you for you for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like your mother has given you permission to get married at 16 but you are questioning if you will be able to move out one you are married. We want you to know that we are not legal experts but to our limited knowledge of the law in order to get married before the age of 18 you have to have permission from your parent/ guardian. Then once you are married you are emancipated and you can do what you please. What that process looks like? We would not know you could try getting in contact with someone at your local courthouse.
      Again, thank you for reaching out and we hope this information helps. We provide free, confidential, and nonjudgmental services. Everyone deserves to be respected and loved. 1-800-786-2929

  • I have a question? My girlfriend wants to run away from home and I really just want to know if legally there is anything that her parents can do and my second question is that if she were to run away to my house can my parents leagally get in trouble?

    Comment


    • ccsmod7
      ccsmod7 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello there, thanks for reaching out for your girlfriend. You seem like a very supportive partner.

      If your girlfriend is under 18 years old, her parents could file a runaway report for her with the local police. Running away is typically a status offense, meaning something she cannot do due to her age. So if she is found she would be returned home by police. If she is found at your parents’ house and they are aware that she is a runaway, her parents could potentially press “harboring a runaway” charges against your parents. That is usually a misdemeanor offense.

      Please do not hesitate to reach out via phone or chat if you have more questions, or want to talk through your situation. You might also give your girlfriend our number (1-800-RUNAWAY) so we can best help her. We can provide support, talk over her situation, and help brainstorm her options.

      Best of luck,

      NRS

  • -Runaway-
    I've been thinking about running away because of my mom treating me so poorly because I'm the only girl in the family. I have 2 brothers and I'm the only oldest sister. I'm only 16 and I'm a junior. I've been trying to be patient when I turn 18 to move, but I won't be 18 until school is finally over for me and it feels too long to go through this suffering. My mom change schools for me, took my phone away, took everything, still gets mad that I'm with my boyfriend. She basically lost every respect out of me but doesn't wanna talk to me and work it out.. I cant take it anymore because its too hard... in my new school I don't eat lunch or have any friends because I feel like an outcast and its hard to make friends as a Junior. I've been planning to run away to my boyfriends place.. knowing if I can probably *hopefully* get my parents agreement on letting me go *which I really doubt* I told my boyfriend to help me call what buses to take on the Transit so whenever I feel like running away *which I haven't decided yet, but I feel so close* I told him my choices were to run away or just kill myself.. My boyfriend is 17 and I'm 16 when he drives *which I'm willing to look forward to so he can just pick me up and i'll be gone* My parents think I'm weird and have been really rude to me saying I need to 'change' but I cant change if I don't know what I'm doing wrong and I cant change when I feel so depressed. My boyfriend has been the absolute sweetest to me.. He's been there whenever my parents weren't there for me. Honestly my parents don't know anything much about me they don't talk to me much and think I'm fine all the time and call me 'weird' for not opening up to them, but if they just take the time to talk to me and ask me questions then I'm open like a book. I just need some help and clarifications... I don't know where I want to stand anymore.. It's just so difficult for me..

    Comment


    • Reply: Runaway

      Hello,
      Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

      We appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
      Some situations can be disappointing and even upsetting thus making things uncertain about what to do or where to turn.
      We understand and we want you to know that we are here as support to help you during this difficult time.

      Feeling isolated at times at home and school must be frustrating but it sounds like your boyfriend has been a comfort to you. It sounds like he is very supportive. Good for you and good for him.
      Sometimes things can become overwhelming and emotionally stressful.
      Running away is one thing but suicide is a permanent act.

      It sounds like you would like for your parents to just be open to listening and letting your share your feelings.
      That does not sound like too much to ask for.

      NRS is here to listen and here to help.
      If you would like to talk more about your situation and discuss options that might help you to cope give NRS a call or try our live chat.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or www.1800Runaway.org.
      We are happy to explore options with you. You did a great job reaching out tonight.

      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Take care,
      NRS
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • hey, im thinking about running away, but i dont know what to do or where to go. my friend said he'd go with me because he actually has a plan. but the reason i want to runaway was because of my parents, they dont believe me or trust me, they always yell at me and theyre getting me out of all my sports, and they said theyre sending me away. im trying to run away before they send me away. can my mom call the cops on me? will i get in trouble? what if they find me? what'll happen?

        Comment


        • ccsmod14
          ccsmod14 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. It sounds like things have been frustrating for you at home with your parents yelling and not trusting you.

          We’re not legal experts here so it is hard to say what your legal rights would be in this case but in most states, the legal age of adulthood is 18 and you are able to make decisions for yourself. You can verify the age of adulthood by calling your local police department's non-emergency number. The easiest way to leave home is with your legal guardian's permission. We understand that might be challenging given what you shared about your parents, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your family. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home by police. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway which is a crime. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

          Take care,
          NRS
          Last edited by ccsmod14; 05-05-2017, 07:47 AM.

      • Should I riget a note if I'm gonna run away when I'm older?

        Comment


        • ccsmod8
          ccsmod8 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello there –

          Thank you for taking the time out of your day to get into contact with us here at the National Runaway Safeline on our public forum, we are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. Hopefully by supporting you there are other that are reading through this thread that can relate can feel helped as well.

          Sounds like you are possibly thinking about running away when you’re older and are thinking about whether or not to write a note. That’s a pretty legitimate question and often what some youth struggle with. Now here at NRS we aren’t a hotline that will provide a guideline or survival packet to youth that are going to run away or have already run away from home. We are mainly here for support and help find some guidance to local resources that might be able to help a youth through their particular situation and we aren’t here to tell you what to do because you know your situation a lot better than we do. We just want you to know your options and with whatever you choose that you’re safe and not on the streets. So at the end of the day, that is something that you’re going to have to decide on your own if you’re going to leave a note.

          If you give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help you find resources in your area and could potentially help you brainstorm a possible solution to the issues you are having. We would love to talk to you about what has been going on recently that is making you want to leave home. We also have an online chat service available every day.

          Hope to hear from you!

      • I live with my mom and stepdad. Things have gotten really bad in the past two months they have become abusive towards me and i have bruises up my legs, my ribs are swollen, i have marks on my back from them, and my head hasn't stopped hurting since they pushed me back against a plastic box full of stuff. Along with physical abuse they tell me i'm not good enough or how much of a disgrace i am. Last nigh they told me to "get the hell out" so i did and they called the cops and said that the phone i had they paid for which was a lye so they made me hand over my phone that was then thrown in the pool. I want to leave for good this time. I know where i will go but i don't want to have charges against me. My mom and stepdad have claimed that i have assaulted them though i never have hit them unless in self defence. I don't really know what to do but really wanna take off again.

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello,

          We would like to start off by saying that no one has the right to put their hands on you and cause physical/emotional harm to you. It sounds like a very stressful environment to be in. If you are in school or have close friends or family, it may be beneficial to talk to them about the abuse and take documentation. Contacting child protective services is something that you could potentially do, but depending on the state you live in, there will be different contacts and laws surrounding that.

          Child Help (https://www.childhelp.org/hotline/) is another resource you could contact involving abuse. They may have more resources regarding your situation and have counselors that you could talk to. Their phone number is 1-800-422-4453.

          We are not legal experts, but if you choose to runaway and you are under 18, your parents could get in trouble for not filing a runaway report. If they choose to file a report that would send a notification to the police and they could potentially bring you back to your home. If you were staying with anyone above the age of 18, they could get in trouble with the police as well for harboring a runaway.

          If you have any more questions feel free to give us a call at the National Runaway Safeline 1-800-786-2929. Best of luck to you.

      • Me and my boyfriend have been together for over a year , my mother is trying to keep us apart because she thinks we were doing something nasty in my bedroom. Its been about a month and I can't take it anymore. I keep breaking down , crying , cutting , I don't know what to do. I was thinking about running with him to someone's house. If the cops found me .... Could I be forced to go home ??

        Comment


        • ccsmod1
          ccsmod1 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello,

          Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you are really upset over your mom keeping you and your boyfriend apart, which is understandable. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. You said you are thinking about running away with your boyfriend. In answer to your question, if you are under 18 and you run away with your boyfriend, yes your mom could call the police and the police can force you to go home. We are not legal experts, however we can give general info, and you would risk these consequences if you choose to run away before you turn 18. Anyone you stay with could be charged with "harboring a runaway," which is considered a criminal offense. You may want to consider how you will survive and what your life would look like before running away, such as where you would stay and how you would meet your basic needs like food, or if you would be able to continue your education. It sounds like you have been very upset over this and you have been struggling with cutting. One resource that is helpful if you are looking to get help for self injury is To Write Love On Her Arms; twloha.com. It could also help to have someone to talk to about what you are going through, like a counselor or therapist. If you need help talking through your options and making a plan, don't hesitate to call us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us online. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

      • hi, i'm 14 and i'm in an abusive home. i live with my maternal grandparents and my mom and dad. my mom works all the time and i rarely see my dad either. my grandmother stays home with me when i'm home because she rarely works. my mom is overprotective and invades my privacy, calls my friends stupid and emo, won't let me step out of the house to go anywhere but school, and calls me mean names and threatens to take me out of school. i do not do anything to provoke this behavior. today, my grandmother calls me downstairs, and tells me that i'm stupid to want to spend my money (i've been saving my money since last july, i have over $200, and all i'm doing is buying a $10 backpack for school because they won't buy me one), then tells me that my attitude towards everyone is provocative, and that she knows my attitude at school is the same as at home so i'm a horrible friend, and that i don't take people's feelings into consideration. these things are the things that i take into serious consideration and thought into, so her calling me a horrible friend is heartbreaking. i tried to say that she was hurting my feelings, and she called me a pu***. i had a two-hour long anxiety attack after that. i was nominated for "most friendly" for my school's superlatives this year, but she doesn't know that. i have a small group of friends, but i try to be very nice to everybody. she yells at me everytime i try to say something, even if it's not something against her opinion. i'm suicidal, and when my friend's mom tried to tell my family that i self-harm and that i needed help, she denied it and locked her out of the house. she's in denial all the time and threatens to beat my a** if i don't do something right away or if i don't get a perfect mark at school. my biological father is a criminal, and i can't help but to think i'm becoming just like him, my true nightmare. it's because of all the stuff that my grandmother has said to me lately. i have been trying to tell someone that i'm depressed and suicidal, but it's like they're shushing me. i honestly don't know what to do. my dad, who has adopted me, is such a pleasant man, but my mom is controlling and he has no say in anything that happens to me. i would be fully happy if my mother would give up her rights and my dad and i could move out, but i think he loves her way too much for that to happen. i feel so sorry for him. i luckily have no siblings that live with me, so i'm the only one who's getting abused.

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