Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
This is a sticky topic.
X
X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Re: if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

    Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are going through a lot right now and we’re glad that you chose to reach out to us for assistance. We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we are completely confidential and anonymous.

    First off we want to say that abuse is never okay and no one deserves to be hurt, especially by ones parents. Your dad being an alcoholic and your mom dealing with depression are also hurtful (in addition to the physical, sexual and verbal abuse you suffer). We are not here to tell anyone what to do, we trust that you know your situation the best, so when you say you don’t want to call CPS on them, we respect that. Just to let you know, though, that filing an abuse report can be ‘helpful’ in creating a paper trail and provides background/an explanation to authorities as to why you ran (if you do get ‘caught’ by the police). One great resource to get more information about abuse reporting process and what it looks like is Child Help USA (1-800-422-4453). Child Help USA can provide you with more information as well as put you in connection to your areas local child protective services (CPS). If you are not comfortable with doing this, you can also give us a call here and we can provide you support while you make the report or we can also make the report on your behalf. If you are not comfortable with filing an abuse report, we understand and support you during this time.

    It sounds like you are thinking of leaving home and have questions about the legal consequences for you, your boyfriend, and your parents. We're not legal experts here at NRS, but we can give you some general info. In most states, if you're under the age of 18, you're considered your parents' responsibility. They can therefore file a runaway report if you leave home without their permission. Filling a runaway report protects parents from being charged with neglect if anything were to happen to the youth while on the run. It would also prevent the situation you ask about of whether they would get arrested for you not being in school. Again, while not legal experts, we haven’t heard of this happening.

    It’s technically not illegal to run away. Running away usually doesn't get you arrested but is rather called a status offense, and usually means if the police locate you, that you will be returned home. If you go to Seattle, 6 hours away from your home, you will likely be in a different police district, which in all likelihood would decrease the chances that the police in that city would look for you (because your parents would file the runaway report in the city in which they/you live.

    You mentioned cutting and feeling suicidal at times. Neither of which are easy to go through, although understandable given your situation. There’s an organization called To Write Love On Her Arms if you are interested in finding out about the help they offer regarding self-injury and suicide. There website is twloha.com. Also, you are always welcome to call us and talk about feeling suicidal, as well as the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). They, too, are 24 hours a day. Their website is www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

    You provided a lot of information in your post. Hopefully we were able to address some of your concerns and answer some of your questions. If we left anything out, or if you have any additional questions, or would like to talk about how you are feeling, please do not hesitate to reach out to us again. We are here to listen and here to help.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • help ne

      If a 16 year old leave from home from being emotional hurt can she get introble

      Comment


      • RE: help ne

        Hello there –

        Like we tell a lot of our callers and/or people that email us, the laws on that specific subject of running away vary from state to state. Generally what typically happens in each state is if you are below the legal age of majority (18 in most states except Alabama and Nebraska [19 or upon marriage], and Mississippi [21]), your parents would be able to make a runaway report in the event that you do run away. Since it’s only considered a statues offense and not a crime to run away, the only thing that would happen is that the police will pick you up and bring you back home. This is of course if you had any interaction with the police directly or if they stopped you to ask you a few questions. If she did get get picked up by the police and disclosed that she was getting abused, they might not take her home right away but get child protective services involved.

        Having to deal with the emotional abuse must be really hard. It must be getting very overwhelming to the point where you want to leave home without anyone knowing. No one deserves to be treated that way. Just know that you always have the right to report any abuse (physical, mental, sexual) to your local police department, family member, or child protective service in your state. If that is something that you don’t really feel comfortable with doing, you can always give us a call to help answer any questions about the process or to walk you through what steps there are. Also, if you are feeling that you are in danger or scared please don’t hesitate to call out to the police. They can come and check up on things for you.
        Last edited by ccsmod8; 04-19-2016, 10:51 AM.
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • Im 12 and about to run away

          Im yelled at almost every night and my mon and dad fight so much i have already walked off about 3 miles down but i came back and got yelled at again and i and done and im called a stupid b***** and dumb **** and lots more should i really run away every time i try to talk to my mom and dad they yall at me

          Comment


          • Re: I'm 12 and about to runaway

            Hello There!

            Thanks for reaching us at the National Runaway Safeline. It is a great first step to finding the information and help that you may need. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time right now being home and with your parents. These things can definitely can be frustrating and overwhelming. You are so strong for having gone through so much already and doing what you think is best for you. No one deserves to have to deal with such treatment. Home should be a place of safety, comfort, and support.

            Some things to think about for the future if you will continue your education. How long do you anticipate on being gone or being able to stay where ever you may be? How will you support yourself or whom you will be staying with be willing to support you financially with food, clothing, other personal expenses/ allow you to stay rent free? What if things do not work out here in the future, what will be your back up plan? We could also help find some possible shelters in your area if you need another safe place to stay. However, sometimes this option brings up some other issues. Typically youth shelters may at some point ask for parental consent /check if a runaway report is filed and the time of stay is not typically long term. If you call us at 1800-RUNAWAY we could call out to these shelters for you or with you in advance to check on these aspects.

            Another important detail is thinking about what your parent’s reaction will be. We are not legal experts here, but typically being under the age of what your state considers to an adult (usually 18 ), you would need permission from your parents to leave. It is not illegal to runaway or leave home without permission, but it would mean that your parents could file a runaway report. The police would then be required to return you home.

            We hope that this information that was helpful.
            Stay Strong,
            NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • Re: if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

              hello, im 15 and im about to turn 16. im planing on running away on my birthday. the reason why is because my mom once kicked me out of the house i left but my aunt looked for me and i was with her than my mom wanted me back and tried hitting me. we fight a lot and i feel like she hates me she told me im worthless just like my dad. i met my dad not so long ago and he told my mom he doesnt want me bc im trouble. well like i was saying yesterday she told me she didnt want me home and she thinks im going to commit suicide but im not im over that already. she keeps telling me she wants me out. what can i do??

              Comment


              • RE: Re: if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

                Hello there –

                Thank you for reaching out to us here on our public forum. After reading everything that you’ve been going through, it certainly sounds like you’ve been going through a lot right now. You’re a very strong individual for being able to go through something like this (being kicked out twice and abused) and still continue to fight for your rights. No one deserves to be treated that way. Just know that you always have the right to report any abuse (physical, mental, sexual, or neglect) to your local police department, family member, or child protective service in your state. Her kicking you out of the home without having a sable alternative for you to live is considered neglect and child endangerment. If that is something that you don’t really feel comfortable with doing, you can always give us a call to help answer any questions about the process or to walk you through what steps there are. Also, if you are feeling that you are in danger or scared please don’t hesitate to call out to the police. They can come and check up on things for you.

                You have mentioned that in the past that you were living at your aunt’s house when you were kicked out the first time, but then you went back to living with your mother. If your mother were to kick you out again, do you think that your aunt would let you stay with her again for as long as you need? It’s great that she was there to support you the first time when you needed the help. If you didn’t have anywhere to stay, staying at a youth shelter might be an option as well. Most shelters are required to call a child’s parents or legal guardian if they are under the age of 18 though. That is to let them know where they are and even then most aren’t going to be a lot term living situation for youth. We don't want you to be on the streets were it can get to be a little dangerous so a resource that you might be able to look into if you’re looking for a safe place to go, would be to visit The National Safeplace website (www.nationalsafeplace.org). This organization provides access to immediate help and supportive resources for youth in need. You can look up your city and state to see if there is any safe places near you listed. They are usually places like designated school, fire stations, libraries, etc. So that is always an option if you feel like go to talk to someone in person and what has been going on. If you don’t have one in your area, we can search for one in our database as well.

                If you give us a call on our 24/7 fully confidential hotline, at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help answer some of those questions you have and could potentially help you brainstorm a solution to the issues you are having. We also have an online chat service available every night from 4:30-11:30PM CST that is available through our website (www.1800runaway.org) if you don’t feel like calling in to talk on the phone.
                Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                National Runaway Safeline
                [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                Tell us what you think about your experience!
                https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                Comment


                • Trying to run away on my birthday

                  Hi.... i want to run away from my family! I have done it plenty of times and the cops brought me home! The last time i did this was a month ago, and when i was home my dad told me that the cops told them that the next time i do this to let me leave and if i ever come back to kick me out! And im planing to leave and never go back to them! Will anything happen? will the cops do anything! cause the cops said to let me leave? but was it just to scare me?

                  Comment


                  • Re: Trying to runaway on my birthday

                    Hello There,

                    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway . It is a great first step to finding the information and help that you may need. Taking this step often takes much courage, which shows how strong of a person you in doing so.

                    It sounds like you have quite some experience with running away and the cops returning you home. We would not be able to confidently answer as to what the police said or what your father said to be exact. We are not legal experts here, but typically being under the age of what your state considers to an adult (usually 18 ), you would need permission from your parents to leave. It is not illegal to runaway or leave home without permission. However parents kicking their children out is not okay and could be considered to be form of neglect.

                    Some things to think about for the future if you will continue your education at some point. How long do you anticipate on being gone or being able to stay where ever you may be? How will you support yourself or whom you will be staying with be willing to support you financially with food, clothing, other personal expenses/ allow you to stay rent free? What if things do not work out here in the future, what will be your back up plan? We could also help find some possible shelters in your area if you need another safe place to stay. However, sometimes this option may mean at some point ask for parental consent /check if a runaway report is filed and the time of stay is not typically long term. If you call us at 1800-RUNAWAY we could call out to these shelters for you or with you in advance to check on these aspects.

                    If there is someway that could try to support you in anyway. Remember that we are here to listen and help as best as we can. You are not alone!

                    Stay Strong,
                    NRS
                    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                    National Runaway Safeline
                    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                    Tell us what you think about your experience!
                    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                    Comment


                    • Re: if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

                      Hi I’m 17 years old and I live in Maryland. My mom put me out of her house but she has sole custody of me. My dad came and picked me up from the middle of the street, my mom would not allow me to take any of my belongings she turned my phone off and
                      took my key. My dad is happy to have me as we have a great relationship. He has spoken with my mother so she is aware of my whereabouts. My dad and I are trying to figure out if my mom can call the police and make me come back home when she changes hermind in a few days as she has done in the past. I plan to file a petition for modification of custody and my father is
                      supporting me with that. Due to the fact that he pays child support we are aware that she will fight this. Until last night I had never told anyone that I’ve been so depressed for the past year and a half that I have been cutting myself (I have the markson both arms and legs). I fear that if the police come to my dads and make me leave just because my mom changed her mind that I
                      will continue to cut myself. I don’t want to do that anymore and I’ve told my father what I have been doing, he is waiting for a little cool off time before he tells my mother my secret. I really don’t want to go back and I am filing the proper paperwork
                      but what can I do in the meantime while I wait for the court hearing. I don’t want to get my father into trouble and he is trying to figure this out with me. My mother is not a reasonable person so trying to talk it out with her is not an option. Is
                      there anything I can say if and when the police show up that will persuade them to allow me to stay with my dad until the court hears my case. If I show them my cut marks will that make a difference? What if I tell them I will cut myself again if under my
                      mothers’ care? But I don’t want them to take me to a mental institution, I’m aware that this is unhealthy and I’ve came clean tomy dad and he is taking me to get some therapy. but what can I do while I wait, that will prevent the current order of
                      custody which was made when I was 3 no longer binding at least until I get a new court hearing.
                      Last edited by ccsmod15; 04-28-2016, 07:41 PM.

                      Comment


                      • trying to runaway on my birthday

                        I understand.... but what im trying to figure out is, my dad said the next time i leave i can't come back. So, does that mean he gave me permission to leave?

                        Comment


                        • Re: if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

                          Hello,

                          We’re not legal experts, so we couldn’t tell you with certainty whether him telling you that can’t come back would count as giving you permission. From what we do understand, if you’re considered a minor and your custodial parent or legal guardian refuses to let you live there, you may have the option of reaching out to your local police department to let them know that you’ve been locked out of your home. What they do at that point really depends on the laws in your state. If you’d like more specific information for legal resources that could help inform you on what constitutes permission and whether reporting that you’ve been locked out is an option in your area, feel free to give us a call. We will gladly look up resources for you. You can reach us 24/7 at 1.800.RUNAWAY (786.2929). We’re also available to look up resources via chat every day from 4:30pm – 11:30pm CST. Feel free to reach out to us anytime. Stay safe!
                          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                          National Runaway Safeline
                          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
                          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                          Comment


                          • I need help

                            I hate my dads I would willing run away to my moms house, at my dads I've contemplated suicide multiple times and might do it, my mom makes me happy and safe but I'm only 12. If I explain my situation to the cops will they let me go?

                            Comment


                            • Re: if i runaway can my mom call the cops?

                              Hello,
                              Thank you for reaching out to us. We’re sorry to hear that your mom put you out of the house. It sounds like living with your mom has been really tough and you’ve been hurting yourself in an effort to deal with the stress you’ve been feeling. We’re glad that you feel supported by your dad as you work to keep yourself safe, it sounds like you’ve identified a few challenges you might face as you try to petition for modification of custody. You’re asking some really great questions and, even though we’re not legal experts, we will do our best to provide you with information so that you can decide what steps you feel comfortable taking.

                              You mentioned that your mom put you out and your dad had to come pick you up. If you’re considered a minor in your state and your legal guardian has kicked you out, you may be able to reach out to your local police department and let them know that you’ve been locked out by your guardian. How your local police department handles these types of situations can vary depending on where you live. Moreover, whether there’s anything you can say that might allow you to stay with your dad while you wait for your petition to come to court (like showing them your cuts, telling them you’d cut yourself if they made you go back to her) would also depend on where you live. Whether they would have you go to local mental health hospital is also up to your local police department. The best way to find out how your situation might be handled would be to reach out to someone familiar with the laws of your state. One option you have would be to reach out to your local police at their non-emergency number. Another option would be to call your local legal aid office. It’s important that you know that, while calling us would be confidential, that’s not necessarily the case if you reach out to your local police department. If you have concerns about that, we would be happy to help you make that call. If you don’t know how to reach your local police department or legal aid, feel free to give us a call or send us a chat and we can look that up for you. Even if you just need someone to talk to, don’t hesitate to reach out to us. We’re here to support you in whatever you decide to do, and we’ll do our best to give you as much information as we can to help you stay safe.
                              Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                              National Runaway Safeline
                              [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                              1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
                              https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                              Comment


                              • Re: I need help

                                Hi there,

                                It sounds like you are in a difficult situation with your dad and are considering running away. It sounds like you are having a really hard time staying at home with your dad. Home should always feel safe and comfortable. You are very brave to reach out for help and share your story on our forum. It sounds like overcoming thoughts of suicide is something you’re battling with. That can’t be easy to be going through and we are here to support you. You are always welcome to call us when you are feeling suicidal and need someone to talk to about those feeling. One resource that you can call in addition to us is the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK. They are also 24/7 and can talk to you in times of crisis.
                                We are glad to hear you would feel comfortable going to your mom if you were to leave home. They have counselors who can talk with you if you are ever feeling suicidal and need support. You asked a good question wondering if the police will let you go and we are not sure how they would react. It may depend on who your legal guardian is if that is your dad or your mom. We are here to support you, and we can talk further about your options and talk more in depth about your situation if you are able to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY where you can remain confidential and we are available 24/7.

                                Best,
                                ~NRS
                                Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                                National Runaway Safeline
                                [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                                1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
                                Tell us what you think about your experience!
                                https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X