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  • running away

    OK I'm 15 turning 16 I live with my mother, older brother, and little sister. I fight all the time with my mom and older brother it getting fiscal all the time.I have bruise and make where something had hit me of where they have got me, I have taken it for a long time. She made me life with my dad then her chocked and hit me and I came home. But I can't take it anymore here I don't feel safe or protected her one bit. I have talk to a lady in a different state and she is going to help me get my life on straight. I'll have a job and a place to live, and will be going to school when I get up there. Would my mother can the cops if I left and moved away.

    Comment


    • Re: running away

      Hi there,

      Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have been going through a lot but we’re really glad that you have contacted us. We’re here to support you in any way that we can.

      So it sounds like you and your brother have been getting in physical fights at home. You don’t deserve to be getting hit by anybody. Is there something particular that starts these fights? It sounds like you also lived with your dad for a short time and he hit you. You do not deserve to be hit by anybody. You deserve to feel safe at home. Have you ever thought about making a report before? If this is something you want to explore further, or would like help making a report, you can call us at 1800runaway and we can help you through this.

      We’re not here to tell you what to do. You know your situation better than we do, we just want to help keep you safe. It sounds like you have a place in mind that you would go to, do you know this person well that you would potentially be staying with? We’re not legal experts, but generally speaking if you left without your legal guardian’s permission, they would have the right to make a runaway report. If a report is made, and the police find you, they just bring you back home. However, in most states there is a law against harboring a runaway, which means anyone that a runaway stays with could potentially be charged for this.

      We’re here to explore your situation and your options with you. We also have many resources including shelters and counseling services. If you would like to talk more, please do not hesitate to call or chat us. There’s always someone here to listen and help.

      Good luck and stay safe,
      NRS
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
      Tell us what you think about your experience!

      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

      Comment


      • Help asap

        Hi, I'm planning on running away to my
        Mom's. My dad, who I just met a month or so ago, took me away from my home with my mom and my sister out of this state . I plan to arrange for my mom to come pick me up at a location I haven't decided yet, both of my parents have rights to me, they aren't divorced yet. Any advice? Could I be taken back once I get to my mom? Or taken by the state?

        Comment


        • RE: Help asap

          Hello,

          Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline and sharing with us a little bit about what has been going on. It sounds like being with your dad is not something that you want. It must be hard for you to be away from your mom and sister, people who sound like they mean a lot to you. Here at NRS we are here to listen and support you in what ways we can. No one deserves to be someone where they do not want to be and we are glad that you decided to reach out to us for help and support.

          You mentioned that you want to leave to go to your mother’s house, and you also mentioned that both your mom and dad have legal rights to you as they have not gone to court yet to have that arranged. We are not legal experts, but we can speak in general terms. Generally you cannot leave your legal guardian (parents) home without their permission. If you do, then they would have the option of filing a runaway report with the police. Running away, or leaving without permission, is not a criminal offense, it is a status offense. This means that if found that you would just be brought back home to your parents’ house. Anyone with whom you are found can be charged with harboring a runaway, which is a misdemeanor offense.

          It sounds like your situation might be a little different since they live in separate states and they both have rights to you. Because we are not legal experts, we cannot say for sure what would happen if the police were to find out- will they allow you to go to your moms or force you to return to your dads. One option you have is to call your local police department (both where your mom lives and your dad), and generally ask them how they would handle a situation like this, I wouldn’t tell them that it is you that it is referring to.

          We don’t know the detailed circumstances of your situation but if you would like to call us or chat with us we would love to discuss your situation in greater detail. We hoped this helped and we look forward to you contacting us again. You can reach us at our hotline number or chat with us during our chat hours. We look forward to hearing from you and we wish you the best of luck.

          NRS
          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

          National Runaway Safeline
          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

          Tell us what you think about your experience!
          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

          Comment


          • 18 year old runaway too

            Hi I'm 18 years old and live in New Jersey. I've been wanting to run away for over a year now. My situation is pretty much the same as everyone else's I live at home with my mother and stepfather who inappropriately* touched me causing my family and I to have an open case with the state for the second time in my life. The experience scarred me emotionally especially due to my history of being inappropriately touched before by his friend who used to be a close and trusted friend to the family. This was how i was first put into a case. Two years i spent going to psychologists, therapists, and court meetings. My mother's way with dealing with everything was sending me to live with my father and the case was then closed and the man who did that to me was never brought to justice. Through out my younger years as a small child I was inappropriately touched by others so eventually by the time I was 10 I was kept away from other people. My mother started telling me that the reason that she keeps me from other children my age was because she said that I would corrupt them. In my mind it registered as you can't be around other children your age because something* is wrong with you. I was 8 the first time i was touched by a man and knew what a man looked like. And he told me to remain silent for a year. That silence caused me to hide within my self never letting anyone in. I went to school to be bullied along with everything else. While my first case was open so when I left to stay with my dad it was a nice break and I thought everything would be fine again.

            However I came back home back to the same school back to the same thing. My mother always put me down about everything saying how I was rebelling how I was such a rebellious child, which I must admit I had my rebellious stage but as I got older it died down yet my mother always had it in her head that I was bad so I tried my hardest to please her to make her happy with me and satisfied* with me. But it seemed that no matter what I did it wasn't good enough. So there grew the feelings of worthlessness, of not being good enough and each failure drove self hate. So I never tried my best at anything never gave my all because I asked myself what was the point? My mother sent me to my father again after that, she said it was because she wanted to straighten me out and see if I could "change" and that only fueled the feelings I had of not being good enough. I stayed with my dad for a year with little trouble. I was content the only down side was the knowledge that I was being used occasionally* for free babysitting labor while my father ran the streets* and went out. (I'm his 8th child btw) when I came back AGAIN to my mother. We were forced to move almost immediately when I came. Oh yeah failed to mention all the times we moved around I lost count. It wasn't that long after I returned home and we moved when my stepfather began acting strangely and touching me making me feel uncomfortable. I was 15 when I returned home. I stayed quiet about it for a few months but when patting me on the rear turned into hugging, and hugging turned into laying next to me ( really close to me with an arm around me) and laying next to me turned into inappropriate conversations I eventually told and once again another case was opened. He had to move out then and while the case was going on he was out of the home for 2 years. I watched my siblings alot during that time* since he was gone and my mother was working I had to. Everything was pretty stressful for me and I was unable to maintain focus. I had a secret relationship* that lasted a year and a few months and he helped me cope but I wasn't allowed to have a boyfriend so eventually the strain and restrictions*my mother put on me led me to break up with him. Throughout all this time my mother would constantly put me down about how I don't want to be anything that I'm not going to be anything. All because I wanted to have a boyfriend, all because I wanted to go to the movies and mall with my friends. Friends that I didn't have. All of these things I was always kept away from. I never went anywhere, and I felt isolated it added to my already isolated mind that I kept from everyone. Not too long after I broke up with my last boyfriend I met someone else and I fell in love with him he was like my soul mate we learned everything about each other and he became a steady comfort, my best friend someone who I can run to when I needed something. But he recently came from a relationship* as well and 8 months into the relationship* I realized that he was talking to other females behind my back the whole time sexting them. It crushed me because he was the first person I let in that I loved with all my heart and he betrayed me. I started changing after that. I soon lost interest in the things that mattered I stopped trying to hang out with friends I be came severely depressed and no one even knew. Til* this day my mother is clueless about anything that I went through even being bullied in school. My relationship* became strained and soon I wanted to leave it, but he always convinced me to stay. It took him* until a few months ago to stop what he was doing but it's too late and I didn't want him anymore. When I graduated and started college a few months later I found a new opportunity* to be more independent, but my mindset soon changed. My mother refused to do anything for me well she had long since stopped, but when I needed her help she wasn't giving it. My boyfriend* provided me with everything for that I was grateful. We had talked of running away before when I turned 18 but I wasn't sure if it was okay to leave with a case. The case was soon to be closed but I was unsure. Once I started college I met someone else. He was 24 and although I was never into older guys he drew me in and I felt something that i hadn't felt in a long time. He soon took all of my affection and heart. Soon I told my bf that i wanted to leave him and he started talking crazy saying he was going to hurt himself and I was too scared for his life to leave. I became bitter depressed. I was trapped in the house not allowed to go anywhere watching my siblings all of the time no time to myself to study or do any work my interest in school dwindled and soon I had to drop out. Not to mention my bf was constantly stressing me out and the guy as well and of course my mother. I feel trapped trapped at home trapped in this situation. My mother had met my bf a year ago and came to knew him very well. So he was welcome to my house and he used that to his advantage to keep an eye on me he threatened to do something to the other guy that held my interest. I tried to leave again and he came to my house with bruised knuckles and a face covered in the tears and he begged and begged saying he had no life without me that he was nothing and that he couldn't live without me. I began to feel like he was forcing me to stay in the relationship* and on top of that I was hurting the other guy. Then he said that I was welcome to stay if I needed somewhere to go to start over which i wanted to do. I needed to get a job I needed to go back* to school things I couldn't do while at home. I have met his mother and she gave him the okay that I can stay. And I soon plan* to leave so that I can start over. I feel like that is my only option especially* when my now ex boyfriend won't leave me alone and wants to Suffocate and crowd me. He even tracked me to see* where I was and I feel* like there is no escape. My mother does nothing for Me and doesn't include me in family meals I literally stay in my room away from everyone unless I'm watching kids. I want to leave all of this mess behind and start over I feel helpless like I'm slowly going insane. I just want to know what my mother and the state will do if I leave will I be forced to come home or what.?

            Sorry for the long novel

            Comment


            • RE: 18 year old runaway too

              Hello,
              Thank you for reaching out to us. Also, thank you for sharing your story with us. We are sure other people may read it and will be able to identify with some of your struggles. It seems like you have been through a lot of physical and mental abuse. You certainly don’t deserve that and it is great that you realize it and seem to make reports about the inappropriate things that do happen. It is great that you are trying to find the best path for yourself to be happy and pursue schooling; that’s very admirable. We aren’t legal experts here but we can speak generally. Typically since you are 18 you are no longer a minor, in most states. What that means is you are free to choose where you stay and what you do (within legal limits, of course.) It seems like it is important that you find somewhere that will make you mentally happy, or at least get you on the path to happiness. You have been through a lot in your life so far and it is great that you are trying to turn things around. If you need help choosing what path would be best for you, you can contact us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24/7 and are confidential and anonymous. We hope to hear from you soon. Good luck.
              NRS
              Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

              National Runaway Safeline
              [email protected] (Crisis Email)
              1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

              Tell us what you think about your experience!
              https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

              Comment


              • Is this kidnapping ?

                Hi, My mom is really hard on only me, I have 3 other brothers . She loves them an adores them but when it comes to me she treats me completely different, I've helped her and they haven't but she still treats them better than me she flips out if I ask one question. My brothers call me names and make me feel horrible. At school on Friday I got hives from an allergic reaction my hives are still there and getting worse have not seen a doctor, I have never token an allergy test so we don't know what I am allergic to. She called this nurse thing it my hives have not gone way. And a few days ago it was my brothers birthday and she wouldn't take me she said it was there day not mine . Today it was my youngers brothers day and I have to deal with it . She has told me to leave numerous of times and that me and my dad should go back were we used to live and stay there. I don't want to go back but she wants me to . She makes me feel awful to everyone thinks I'm just ungrateful and crazy. My dad has finally seen how mean she is to me and trying to figure stuff out. But he doesn't want to leave my mom and my brothers . My dad has cheated on my mom and has done bad things but my dad has never treated us like this . My dad has done all those things and she treats him better than me . No matter what I do I am always wrong and I'm sick of getting put down. If my friends mom buys me a ticket back home and takes me in would that be considered kid napping ? Even though my mom has told me to leave numerous times? And told me she was going to send me away. I do not want my friends mom to get in trouble

                Comment


                • Re: Is this kidnapping?

                  Hi,

                  Thanks for contacting us today, it sounds like you are going through a pretty tough time right now. You definitely don’t deserve to have your mom make you feel so poorly and keep you from getting medical attention. But it sounds like your dad is starting to be a bit more supportive, which might be helpful for you moving forward.

                  Here at NRS, we aren’t legal experts, so we can’t say exactly what could happen if your friend’s mom were to buy you a ticket and take you in. We can, however, talk in general terms. So, if a youth leaves home before they are 18 (in most states), then they can be considered a runaway. Running away isn’t illegal, it’s just a status offense. What that means is, a parent/guardian can file a runaway report with the police and that pretty much just labels the youth as a runaway so that the police know to return them home if they encounter the youth. As long as the youth isn’t caught doing anything else illegal and isn’t on probation or anything, being returned home is usually the biggest consequence.

                  However, there can be bigger consequences for adults who help runaway youth. We do know that if someone lets a runaway youth stay with them, then they could possibly get charged with harboring a runaway. This is usually a misdemeanor offense, however that can mean different things based on your state. Some other things that could make this more serious would be if you are crossing state lines, and possibly if your friend’s mom helped you runaway. Again, we aren’t legal experts, so the best way to find out what could actually happen would be to call your local police department’s non-emergency number and ask them hypothetically/anonymously what the legal consequences of your situation could be.

                  If you aren’t comfortable making that call, then you can always call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), our hotline is 24/7, or chat with us on our website, www.1800runaway.org, 4:30pm-11:30pm CST. We are totally confidential and anonymous and can make that call for you. We can also just talk about your situation, help you come up with safe options for yourself, and provide any referrals you may need.

                  Good luck!
                  Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                  National Runaway Safeline
                  [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                  1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                  Tell us what you think about your experience!
                  https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                  Comment


                  • I Need Help 😩

                    I'm 17 Years Old And I Need Help There Been So Much In My Life And I Wanted To See What Do They Do For A Runaway At 17 Years Old . 😩💯👌

                    Comment


                    • re: I need help

                      Hey there,

                      Thank you for being able to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline, it seems like you are going through a pretty tough time at this point in your life and we want you to know that we are here to listen and to help you in the best way we can. We’re sorry that things have been pretty rough in your life and we want to help you in the best way we can.

                      Unfortunately, we are not legal experts here at NRS but we can share some general information about your situation. So, because you are 17, in most states you would still be considered a minor which means that if you were to run away your parents are still allowed to file a runaway report. Typically, if you are found, you would be forced to go home. Running away is not necessarily illegal but it is a status offense, which means that you are not allowed to do it because you are a minor. The only way you would be arrested is if you were on some type of parole or probation. As I mentioned, we are not legal experts here, the best way to find out what would happen in your state and county is to reach out to your local police department and ask these general questions.

                      There are some things you might want to consider before you decide to leave home. I have listed some questions below, feel free to think about this before you make a vast decision:

                      • What else can I do to improve my home situation before I leave?
                      • What would make me stay at home?
                      • How will I survive?
                      • Is running away safe?
                      • Who can I count on to help me?
                      • Have I given this enough thought?
                      • What are my other options?
                      • If I end up in trouble, who will I call?
                      • When I return home, what will happen?

                      Please remember that we are here 24/7 and would love to talk through some options with you. We wish you the best of luck in whatever it is you decide to do and also hope to get your call soon.

                      Stay strong,

                      NRS
                      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                      National Runaway Safeline
                      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                      Tell us what you think about your experience!
                      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                      Comment


                      • help

                        im 11, and a massive, stupid burden to my family. especially science my dad died, and we moved into an apartment, and are struggling for money, so I'm leaving. (planning, at least) i have a fake name, and I'm gonna buy a phone by raising up money. i need help with this. I'm 11 in alabama, can i get arrested at all? any type of detention center?

                        Comment


                        • Re: help

                          Hi there,

                          If you have contacted NRS today through another means (for example, live chat, email or bulletin) for the same issue, it would be helpful to let us know that you have already contacted us. NRS understands it takes courage to reach out for help; therefore, we would like to minimize the need for you to repeat your situation and avoid offering you duplicate services.

                          Thank you for contacting us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have been going through a lot at home with your dad passing away and has got to be really hard. We’re glad that you have contacted us, we’re here to help the best that we can.

                          So you shared that you feel like you are a massive burden to your family. This has got to be such a difficult feeling to have. Is there something specific happening at home that makes you feel this way? One option might be to communicate this feeling to your family, to see if there is anything that they can do differently in their actions. It can be hard to confront family or friends about issues or feelings that you are having, which is one of the reasons we offer conference calling here at National Runaway Safeline. If you were to call us at 1800runaway, we could make a call out to a legal guardian and conduct a call and mediate the communication between the two of you.

                          We’re not here to tell you what to do, we just want to make sure that you are safe in whatever decision you make. There are a few things that can be helpful to think through before running away:

                          What else can I do to improve my home situation before I leave?
                          What would make me stay at home?
                          How will I survive?
                          Is running away safe?
                          Who can I count on to help me?
                          Am I being realistic?
                          Have I given this enough thought?
                          What are my other options?
                          If I end up in trouble, who will I call?
                          When I return home, what will happen?

                          There is always someone here to listen and here to talk. Please do not hesitate to call us or chat us. We’re here to support you.

                          Good luck and stay safe,
                          NRS
                          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                          National Runaway Safeline
                          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
                          Tell us what you think about your experience!

                          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

                          Comment


                          • What would happen?

                            My friend just turned sixteen and her mom isn't the best. Her mom doesn't treat her appropriately and according to her age. Her mother is trying to protect her from whatever happened in her childhood so gives her no freedom. It is from school to home and home to school unless she is around. Her mother is always on top of her and sometimes even hits her for mistakes that she has done. Her mother always screams at her for little things and my friend no longer wants to be in this situation. I would like to know if she is able to leave the house without consent and live with her father which has always been nothing but good to her and treats her according to her age and takes good care of her.

                            Comment


                            • RE: What would happen?

                              Hello,

                              Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline and sharing with us some of what has been going on at home for your friend. We are so sorry to hear that things at home with your friend and her mom are not going well. It is really awesome that she has her dad and you to turn to for support during this tough times. We are glad that she has you guys to help her through.

                              We are not legal experts, but I can speak in general terms. Generally, the age of majority is 18. If your friend decided to leave before she turns 18, then her legal guardian (which sounds like her mom) would be able to file a runaway report with the police. If your friend was found then she would just be brought back home to her mom. Running away is not a criminal offense, it is a status offense. This means that because of her age she cannot do anything without parental consent, that from your legal guardian. Anyone that helps her or she is found staying with could be charged with harboring a runaway by the police or her mom. Harboring a runaway is a criminal offense, misdemeanor offense. This is some general information about what might happen if she decided to leave.

                              It sounds like your friend is being mistreated at home. No one deserves to be mistreated regardless of what is going on. One option that your friend has is to report the mistreatment to your state Child Protective Service. You can reach them by calling Child Help USA at 1800.433.4453.

                              You also stated that she wants to go to her dads and that he has always been good to her. That is great to hear that she has a parental figure that is treating her right. Maybe he would be able to step in and talk with you friends mom in order to help the situation for the youth. Another option could be your friend turning to a trusted adult to help her out wither situation.

                              We hoped this helped and we would like to discuss your friend’s situation in greater detail. You can have her give us a call or you can on our hotline or you can chat with us during our chat hours. We hoped this helped and we look forward to hearing from either of you. We wish you two the best of luck.

                              NRS
                              Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                              National Runaway Safeline
                              [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                              1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                              Tell us what you think about your experience!
                              https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                              Comment


                              • runaway

                                something just went down at my house and its really really bad. my dad does not know about the situation yet nad i hope it stays that way but i have a 23 year old brother who i can go to.. if i just leave a note saying t hat i can't be home right now i just need some air and that i'll be home in a few days, would they have the right to still call the cops and would they make me come home still? please answer ASAP

                                Comment

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