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I Have to Get away

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  • I Have to Get away

    I’m not a runaway, just to start with. I have no intentions of running away either, I just have to get away. My parents have never been together, they had two kids and they decided they weren’t meant to be together, so they went their separate ways. Yeah an odd way to live life.

    Any who, for the most part I have lived with my mom the majority of my life, I spend the weekend with my dad. In recent years, she has become increasingly bitter towards me, I am her only daughter, and the middle child. I don’t exactly know the cause of her bitterness, because as time went on we just stopped talking like we used to.

    I would blame the way she was raised, which wasn’t exactly pleasant, her father was extremely violent, and I believe that is how she thinks she should handle things-I want to clarify she has never hit me, but sometimes her words feel like punches to the gut. I want to get away.

    She has always criticized me for the way that I look, or what I’m doing. A recent example-in my town they were having a protest on our bridge against the corona virus, I had no idea it was happening, yet I still went on a bike ride that day, across that bridge (I was at my dad's at the time) I didn’t even know it was happening.

    When I told her what I did she screamed at me, calling me a ********** and a liar and how I would never ********ing learn my place, I didn’t even join in that protest, I had no idea it was happening. I was in tears by the end of the conversation.

    she talked to me like an hour later, like nothing was wrong, and I wanted to shut down. I have wanted to move in with my dad for a very long time, but all she does is scream at me, never giving me an answer except for ‘no’ and I feel so trapped.

    I want to leave, because this environment is unhealthy and toxic and it hurts me to be around her. I love my mom, somewhere in me I know I still do, and I don’t want to hurt her. But I have to get away, I have to leave.

    It’s better, I know it is.

    I just don’t know how to tell her.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 05-01-2020, 03:29 AM.

  • #2
    Hello,
    Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

    We appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
    Some situations can be disappointing and even upsetting thus making things uncertain about what to do or where to turn. It can be tough trying to sort out your own feelings let alone trying to figure out the behavior of others. When communication is tough sometimes situations become overwhelming and frustrating. You do not deserve to be spoken to the way she did that day or any day. You have feelings and they matter.



    It sounds like things have been growing more and more difficult in the relationship between you and your mother. It’s not your fault that she chooses to behave this way. It took a lot of courage for you to reach out to NRS.
    Good job. It sounds like you have a nice relationship with your father. Perhaps you might consider speaking with him about how to approach the situation.
    NRS is here to listen and here to help.
    We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

    If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon. NRS is here to listen and here to help.
    We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or www.1800Runaway.org.

    We look forward to hearing from you.

    Take care,
    NRS

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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