I want to be free from my parents, but am in a complicated situation.

[Unregistered]

I'm in a difficult situation. I am a fourteen-year-old male living in new york state. I do not have a good relationship with my parents and sparing you the details
I feel as if I need to disconnect from them. However the problem is this, nothing they do can be legally classified as abuse, even though I feel emotionally hurt. I'm
below the legal age for emancipation, and getting a job where I could support myself would be difficult, but I AM looking. To add to the mix I have a brother with down syndrome
who I can't abandon. All of this is weighing down on me and I just want to know if there is anything I can do. Thank you for listening, I appreciate the help of another person.

[ccsmod15]

Re: I want to be free from my parents, but am in a complicated situation.

Hi,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like things are really difficult at home right now. Home should be a place where you and your brother feel safe and loved. We are here to help you explore your options.

You mentioned that you do not think you would qualify for abuse, however the laws can be confusing. While we are not legal experts, generally speaking you can file an abuse report for physical, emotional and/or verbal abuse. If you’re feeling emotionally hurt by your parents, this may fall within the definition of abuse. If you would like assistance looking into this option, we can help answer your questions. You can also contact your local police or child protective services (CPS). You are not alone and you have options.

You also shared that you and your brother live together with your parents and that you do not want to leave your brother. That is very responsible and loving of you. Have you tried sharing what has been going on at home with anyone you trust, such as a family member, close friend or someone at school (teacher/counselor/coach)? Perhaps one of these individuals could help speak to your parents about how you have been feeling. It must be really difficult feeling this way at home and it takes a lot of courage to reach out for help.

Other options could be seeing if there is any other family member or close friend that you and your brother could stay with for a while, with your parent’s permission. While we are not legal experts, generally speaking if you were to run away or leave without your parent’s permission they could file a runaway report and if the police found you, they could make you go back home. So when considering your options of staying somewhere else for a period of time, for things to settle down at home, getting your parent’s permission would help you. We could also help you look up youth shelters or alternative living arrangements (ALAs) in your area.

If you would like further help exploring any of these options or others in more detail, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling us at 1-800- RUNAWAY or chatting with us live on our website at www.1800.runaway.org. We look forward to hearing from you.

Take care,
NRS