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My mom makes me want to kill myself

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  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    Thank you for your response to another user’s post. Often forums are a place of support and understanding for many youth. It often may be validating and helpful for users to read similar situations as well as exchange feedback to one another. For anyone experiencing any difficulties or challenges, the National Runaway Safeline encourages youth to reach out to our 24/7 crisis support line either by phone or chat for immediate services.

    Thank you again,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Wow..Im really sorry for what your going through. I hope you keep doing your dreams tho!

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. You should feel loved and appreciated at home and it sounds like your parents have not been treating you fairly.

    You mentioned that your parents make you want to kill yourself and it raises some concern. We care a lot about your safety, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time.

    It can be stressful to try to live up to parental expectations and it makes sense that it would be a sore spot with you and your parents but it is absolutely not ok that your dad has been hitting you. Absolutely no one deserves to be abused. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My Mom and Dad make me want to kill myself or runaway. My Dad always hits me when I do something wrong and if I'm not doing well in school. My Mom always thinks I did stuff that I didn't do and when she asks the rest of the family if they did it and they say no she believes them. My Mom frickin likes our dog more than more me. She said that she can't wait till I get out of the house and like that hurts cause i'm her first born.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,
    It seems like you are having a tough time with your mom at home to the point you are feeling suicidal. You should never be treated like a slave and pushed to the point you feel like that is your only option. It’s understandable to feel frustrated by her hypocrisy and feel like drastic options are the way to go.
    Your life matters, and we want you to know we care about you and want to see things improve for you. There is hope here and things can get better, please reach out to 911 or the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 for immediate help.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I hate my mom so much, I do nothing wrong and she digs up the past. She's a hypocrite doing the things she says that aren't good. She's just some stupid woman bossing her slave. I'm going to attempt suicide by hanging myself. Bye.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod7
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there, thanks for reaching out. Sounds like you have been through more than anyone should ever have to go through, and you have been thinking about killing yourself for a long time now. We are so glad you are still here with us, your life is invaluable and you so deserve to make it through this and to have the opportunity to heal.

    It looks like you might be based in the UK, and if that is case we do not want to give you any misinformation about resources and options since are knowledge base is limited to the U.S. However, there are resources more local to you who are similar to us. We encourage you to reach out to them, you so deserve the support you are looking for:

    Local suicide prevention hotline:
    https://www.samaritans.org/

    Local Child Help hotlines:
    https://www.childline.org.uk/
    https://www.themix.org.uk/

    Best,

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    hi so im female17 turning 18 and need help/advise as i cant get any irl.
    before i turned 10yrs: my dad would rape me in my sleep and id tell my mother she didnt care, my mother chased me with a knife a few times but never got me other than a cut on my arm when i ran under the bed to get away (she said if i were to kill myself she will kill me first as i tried hanging/suffocation when i was 7-9yrs old) she’d beat me over every little thing esp in public, both parents tell me im an accident, lock me in a room with no light food water for over 24hrs, my dad would beat me and lock me in the under stair cupboard for day or two. however my mother would keep me home from school to spend time with her cause she was lonely but would be nasty to me (my dad would beat her 24/7 as he is an alcoholic and drug addict). also do not know any other people than parents and have one younger sibling and one older both favoured over me...they got hit every now and then thats it.
    after 10yrs old:
    still getting hit by both, dad still a drinker/drug user but doesnt hit my mum anymore but he has 4 baby mums and still sexually abuses me til 17 (watching me in showers still, leaving inapropriate pictures on my phone, watching me dress/undress, watching me thru curtains even though im dressed or asleep). haven’t got any friends because i went to a racist school who were rude as i don’t come from privillage and from the hood. (all these things continue til 17)
    13yrs:
    starting to feel suicidal again, hearing voices and seeing things, heavily; smoking weed, drinking, using mdma, prescription drugs n partying etc. staying out house late nights not returning home because i was too busy getting in police trouble (cases, arrests etc). i have really bad anxiety i cant leave the house without being high or i feel too ugly or worthless to get out of bed. and also in a emotionally/verbally abusive relation ship til 16. kicked out of high school 2 years before gratuation and this whole time period was a sucide mission

    16yrs:
    tried killing myself never worked drug tolerance too high and sick of it i wanna live. but cant get a job (legally on paper do not have any qualifications and cant get none because anxiety) come to find out im a paranoid schizophrenic so im house bound for life and need a carer but do not have. father left house and mother doesnt hit shes just more emotionally abusive than ever. self pity parties, one minute she loves me next she wants me to ‘******** off and die’ but another says she needs me. she is very lonely has no friends or family either. (sibilings moves out when i was 14 with relationship partners)
    not on drugs, no legal trouble just saying in a 8 by 12 bedroom gained weight from depression and just numb dont do anything.

    17: things are still the same however i wanna live life more than ever but i leave my bedroom and im now in a negative bubble, i have nobody (no friends at all or any social life, no family members as they do not like us because my mum left them for my dad years ago). but i cant physically do anything like get a job, work & earn, see people, socialise or get away from my toxic mother as i do not have the tools or can aquire the tools to do so. genuinely feel like theres no point of even living because i sit up waiting for the next day watching time pass numb. i do not want to die but what else do i have? please give advice. dont have to tools other than this online option to speak to anyone. only time i spoke to someone and was able an old friend when i was 15, her mother professionaly and diagnosed me with paranoia schizophrenia but only spoke to her for a few moths as i cut that friend off she was very racist towards others and lived far anyway .

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for sharing all that with us. We honor your feelings. You certainly don't deserve the sort of torment your mom is putting you through. That's totally unfair, unkind, and uncalled for. It sounds like she isn't even aware of all the damage that she's causing. If you feel that what she says is emotional or verbal abuse, you have the right to file a report with your state's child abuse reporting hotline or through www.childhelp.org at 1-800-422-4453.

    We are pretty concerned when you talk about killing yourself -- even if it's "just talk." That's pretty serious and clearly is coming from a place of pain.. If you ever feel suicidal, please reach out for the help you deserve. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is staffed by people trained to talk about suicide, so they are a great resource. You can reach them at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org or call 1-800-273-8255. You can also reach out to us anytime to talk about suicide or anything else on your mind. We are confidential and open 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chat at www.1800runaway.org. We want you to be safe. Things can get better and you have many options besides suicide.

    It's great you are opening up about all this. You have a right to be seen and heard. If you ever want to talk about what's going on, please call or chat with us. We're here to listen, here to help.

    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Ok so I’m 15 and I haven’t decided or anything but sometimes I have suicidal thoughts because of my mother. She always takes her anger out on me, There is no physical abuse but sometimes when she shouts at me or criticises me I feel like I want to end it all. She says I can’t do anything sometimes and it feels as painful as a knife in the back.. When she shouts I talk back sometimes saying that if I had a choice to kill you or myself, I would kill myself because she would have to live with the guilt. This is nothing serious because it’s all talk but it feels good to say it in the open world.. When she shouts at me I normally feel like running away and starting a new life but I know that impossible.. On top of all this my mother doesn’t hear herself. She doesn’t know how one of her scoldings digs so deep in to my heart... It’s like mental torture... My mother keeps saying that when she is gone I will regret it but in my mind when she is gone the home will be more peaceful... Whenever my mother goes on vacation everyone else in the house is relieved and at peace when she returns the hurricane starts all over again...

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are dealing with a lot right now, and we want you to know that we are here to help.
    We are sorry to hear that the relationship between you and your mother isn’t good. One option to consider is to try and talk with your mom about how you are feeling. We know you mentioned that she makes fun of you when you try and talk to her and you do not deserve that. At NRS we offer conference calling where if you call us we can call out to your mother and help you have a productive conversation. Conference calling helps the conversation go smoothly and we are there for support.
    We know you mentioned feeling sad and thoughts of suicide, you do not have to deal with these feelings alone. We want you to know that you are worth living and that your life is valuable. Suicide is a permanent decision to a temporary situation. If you ever need someone to talk to or having suicidal thoughts, please call The National Suicide Prevention Hotline at: 1800-273-8255. There is always someone willing to listen and willing to provide support.
    You mentioned using drugs to deal with all of this, you probably already know that drugs are an unhealthy way to cope with everything. Drug addiction is a serious disease, if you feel you need help pleas contact SAMHSA (substance abuse and mental health services association). They can be reached at 877-726-4727.
    We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options, please give us a call. We are here to listen and here to help 24/7. Best of luck!
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My mom makes me want to kill myself ive never been a sad person and I’m only 14 but the constant pain and struggle I go through with her is the worst she’s mean to my brothers and she yells at me and makes me feel worthless and I’m a male and I’m scared to talk about it cause of embarrassment but it hurts it does every day I wish I could go live with my grandma again, I play Xbox with my best friend who lives by my grandma and I love him to death I’ve known him for like 8 years but we play gta everyday and he’s the reason I could never kill myself but I feel like it would ease the pain to be gone my mom thinks I’m ok but I’m not I had a relationship that kinda broke me down a little bit when it ended and I can’t talk to my mom about it because she makes fun of me and I can’t deal with that drugs are my way I will never leave them

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    replied
    Hello,
    Thank you for reaching out during this difficult time. We are sorry to hear you don’t feel supported by your family at home, you have the right to feel safe and wanted! You are not a failure! You mentioned you were thinking about hurting yourself. The National Suicide Hotline https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ is a good resource for talking through your problems. You also mentioned you were sexually abused by a family member. This can cause lots of unseen issues including trouble sleeping, low-self esteem and many other issues. This was not your fault. The Rape Abuse Incest National Network https://www.rainn.org/ is another good resource for you. Please reach out to them if you are feeling like hurting yourself or needing additional support. You can also contact us at any time at 1-800-RUNAWAY if you would like more options. Please stay safe and reach out any time.

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    hi,
    i want to prepare for my upsc..and im not that supported here at home..they did pay for my online class,but they always pull my spirits down by saying that i"m unfit,a failure and that i have bron to just distroy things,and i have been ill treated by many people..and i have a few illness,it has distroyed my self esteem and everything i bear,above all i was sexually abused by my own cousin..i:m not able to seep at nighys..no one to share pain..i just want to live life at my means as long as im alive

    im not able to tell more im tooo broke to pour it out

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We are sorry that things are not going well between you and your mom
    You don’t deserve to have harsh things said to you or be made to feel suicidal.
    It seems that it’s been pretty hard for you. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by what has been going on. It also sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change.

    Your safety and well-being is important.
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.

    Sometimes when communication breaks down with someone you are close to you making it difficult to know just where to turn. You did well reaching out today. We would like you to know NRS is here to listen and here to help. Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of.

    Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
    If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    also here is a link and number you might consider looking into for crisis services. SAMHSA 1-800-985-5990 http://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/disa...tress-helpline
    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe and stay strong,
    NRS
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 04-14-2020, 03:41 AM.
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