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**Guest** · 08-28-2021, 03:48 AM

My mom makes me want to kill myself, she's just a ********** to me, Hella reactive, and blames me for everything. I'm already having a ********ty day and she just makes it worse, I'd be having a good day and she has to ye at me or call me a **********. She had a ********ty life, but that doesn't mean she should treat her kids like ********. It's no ********ing excuse. She punched me in my eye, and just told me other people have it worse and that if I don't stop being dramatic she'll give me something to cry about. I try to talk back, I get tired of her being such an ass. I'll never be heard out. I want to kill myself. Im not sure how.else to put it

**Guest** · 09-13-2021, 02:36 PM

My mother always pressures me to have straight A's in school and when i score lower that a "C" on any assignment in school she beats me takes away my phone shoes and cloths and tells me im a terrible person and that i deserve to die

**Guest** · 09-14-2021, 11:32 AM

Ok so i was getting ready for school and my mom was rushing me and i had my phone next to me and something popped up so i check who it is she yelled at me knowing i have anger issues and i was like dang ok she turn around and yelled at me and punch me i go so mad that i walked out the bathroom and kicked my shoes when i went to my room and i was so mad.this is no the first time she hit me she been hitting since i was 4 And she makes me wanna run away and kill myself i don't know what i should do i want to call the cops but if i do imma be in adoption and I don't want that so i planning on running away

**Guest** · 09-16-2021, 10:18 PM

i just feel like i need to vent here. ever since i had my 13th birthday it’s been going downhill ever since ( i’m 14 now but my god has so much horrible things gone down ) and i really can’t take this much longer. around april a few weeks after my birthday in march she took my phone, and i didn’t react to it nicely so i started talking bad about her to my online friends, and she saw. i continued doing it after getting caught once and eventually she had enough, and next thing i knew, she tells me to go shower randomly in the afternoon. i go upstairs to see what she means and i see she’s moved my bed to get my luggage and it sweeping out my drawers and wardrobe with their hangers and things still on it?? and she says ‘ you’re going to nigeria ‘ ( i think that kinda explains what my race/ethnicity is ‘ and i’m terrified. i’m screaming so loud for help, screaming no, begging for my life, but she doesn’t listen. ‘ maybe you need a new family ‘ ‘ you’re a horrible teenager ‘. skipping some parts, i crawl out a very tiny window and run out onto the street, hoping to get somewhere, but i just run into my aunt. she takes me back home and we talk it out for hours. eventually she doesn’t send me away and to this day i’m still at home. she’s threatened me with it multiple times, and apparently the ticket is still valid. i don’t feel safe around her knowing if i behave badly once ( i’ve always been a good kid, me acting badly then was a FIRST TIME thing. ) she’s going to send me away.

next, she always plans things for me, and doesn’t tell me. i cannot stress this enough how annoying it is. it was the holidays and i’m like oh i want to stay at home ( unless i’m going out with friends i like being home) and she’s like yeah sure. so some days later she tells me to pack my bags and i say for what. and she tells me we’re going somewhere. keep in mind she said somewhere, and never gave me details when or where. the NEXT day, we go to wales. some day during that i tell her i felt forced to come and she snaps at me saying ‘ all we did ( her and my aunt cause she came too ) for you, all the money for you to say that ‘ and i told her i didn’t want to come in the first place and she turned the lights off. this isn’t the first time she’s randomly told me to get ready we’re going somewhere and to be honest i hate it. i can’t stand being unaware of where i’m going. it’s like a trust fall but she fails me every.single.time. and even if she told me, i don’t like going out either, i just want to stay at home, enjoy the few weeks i finall have school. but that’s too much for her.

she always puts the blame on me. ive been noticing her do it more and more, it’s extremely infuriating. being an only child sucks sometimes, because when anything goes wrong she won't blame herself, she’ll blame me. for instance, when i lose something on accident, it’s ‘ my fault ‘ for not ‘ keeping it safe ‘. or when something happens to her and it’s not a good thing its ‘ my fault ‘ countless of times i’m blamed for something i haven’t even done. she makes existing a chore that i continue to do every day.

nothing takes the pain or stress away. everythings going wrong in my life. my ex is in the hospital in and out ( althought he’s my ex, he said he only broke up with me because he knows he’s going to pass away, and he doesn’t want me to be attached with him when he’s gone, even tho when he blocks me on most platforms, i can’t stand not talking to him ) and because we’re online friends, only an hour away irl it’s hard to keep track of him. i wish he was fine. i wanted forever with him but that’s not long enough. i cried all week sometime ago because i thought he was gone, i hadn’t heard from him in a bit. i read our old messages and cried, i missed what we had. i started thinking of how tragic it was he couldn’t read my messages anymore, how upsetting i can’t do everything i’ve wanted to do with him specifically. but worst of all to me, he’s never going to be able to read my messages. that’s what stings the most. i’d love my mum to take me to the hospital, i’ve longed to even meet him, i couldn’t care where, and finally kiss him ( even though i’ve never kissed someone, and i’m so socially awkward around him i’d be too happy to think about anything else ) to maybe just seal our love. i feel terrible for saying i have a crush on another guy, i feel like i’ve moved on too fast, and it looks like i don’t love my ex. but i do only like my crush, and i love my ex.

i think i’ve roughly drained myself. thanks for reading anyone lol. hope ur having a better day than me.

**Guest** · 09-24-2021, 07:04 PM

Everything I do, she's makes me feel like I'm never good enough. I get treated like ******** and like a freak by everyone in my family but she always says I should be nice to everyone. I get yelled at for being lazy just cause I don't wanna go anywhere on my day off or if I enjoy something she says it's worthless. I thought she was supposed to care about me.

**Guest** · 09-28-2021, 05:16 PM

I ********ing hate my mom I really don't know why she being like that every day so I stabilized her

**Guest** · 10-28-2021, 11:58 PM

Hey I’ve never done this before but I need to rant. I just turned 14 like 3 weeks ago bwt. My mother is the absolute worst. She wants me to be that perfect little girl who’s good at everything. She compares me everyone. She insults, but not just any insults. She tells me to go kill myself. She tell me that no one would want me as a life partner. She calls me names. And since I’m adopted she makes it even worse by saying that my biological mother left me on the street for a reason. I hate so much. I cant express it. I cant hang out with friends. It’s like I’m a bird in a cage and she won’t let me out. I’ve gone into this worst position in my life months before. I started to cut myself (DON’T WORRY IM 4 OR 5 MONTHS CLEAN). She saw the cuts and was like “Are you that depressed that you wanna die so bad.” She doesn't care about me. I’m so sick of her. She wants to kick me out of her house. She hits me to the point were I BLEED. Then suddenly she starts to act like she “cares”. Legit the police came over my house 4 times because of her. I have to go to school looking at nothings happening at home when it is. I just want a rest from her. I want to go live far away from her. I hate her, and I can’t express how much I hate her.

**Guest** · 11-21-2021, 07:57 PM

Ever since I was little, I have always been mentally and physically abused by my mother and sometimes my father. I turned 12 just recently. Yes I am young and no I do not care if at my age you were playing with barbies because honestly, thats one of the biggest lies I have ever heard. Back to what I was saying, I am an Asian and my parents have always fitted the Asian Parents Stereotypes but I have not like never. When I was 7 or around that age, I was getting criticized by my parents non-stop and was even called a dumbass at some points. By the age of 7, I was mature but not as mature. For instance, I was respectful and kind. I wasn't perfect but I was a parent's favorite. Everywhere I went with my parents, they would spot one of their friends and the only thing my mom would do was lie about how I acted making me sound perfect. I am pretty sure the only thing she cares about is reputation. See they knew they were abusing me and managed to somehow gain my sympathy and guilt-trip me into not calling the cops and honestly I don't even know what to do. My mom told me many times when I was 7 that I was the reason she wanted to kill herself. Now looking back at what my family has done, I now realize that I am not in the wrong, my parents are. It is very hard for me to call the cops, because I am an over-emotional person, sensitive, and I can't do it. I don't trust either one of them when they say that they love me. I FEEL AS IF MY WHOLE EXISTENCE IS A JOKE, I WANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY AND NOT BLAMED FOR A LOT OF THINGS. YES I DO TALK BACK AND MY PARENTS GET TIRED BUT THATS NO EXCUSE FOR ANY OF THE THINGS THEY HAVE DONE TO ME. THEY HAVE DRIVEN ME TO INSANITY. Thinking about this makes me want to kill myself, but it's fine.

**Guest** · 12-07-2021, 02:18 PM

My dad told me to jump when I told him I way lgbtq.

**Guest** · 01-02-2022, 02:21 PM

Hi im 17, Female. I have a stepmother, but she seems to think she’s my real mother and it’s only got worse since I’m almost finished with school. All I want to do is runaway or end it. I try to talk to people about it but they walk away and never wanna talk. Then when I get bursts of rage I seem to get the urge to cut or better yet I wanna punch her but then she would try to kill me like she has in the past with the belt to the face and 1 time a knife. Sometimes I wish she would’ve done it. I wouldve been happy to see her have a first degree murder on her record. Since she doesn’t give a ********, she only cares about her sweet little niece that lives with us because she has family issues. Which doesn’t help since I’m always babysitting and I don’t like kids at all because they even got me a job at a daycare once, after that I have seen most flaws with having children. But she seems to never threaten the child as she still does with me and she seems to want to punch me more often which I hope one day that she get caught by my dad hitting me or giving me death threats. Since she keeps on saying she wants to kill me.

**Guest** · 02-21-2022, 01:49 PM

Im 14 and a male.
Whenever I try to revise for my tests in high school, my mom always gets annoyed if i am not doing it quick enough. I normally get good results on most of my tests but I do not do very well in religious studies. When my mom shouts at me for not revising one day, I understand why, One thing i do not understand is why she shouts at me for 10-30 minutes and starts hitting me with objects that she has - normally a tv remote or something. I try to stop her hitting me but she continues. She favours the other two of my brothers and always talks about how I should be like them - they are both older than me. I have never in my life seen her shout at them for longer than a minute. When the oldest brother out of the three hears this he gets involved and starts shouting at me (he is 21 right now). This has been going on for the last 4 years. Ever since i went into high school they have despised me. One day my oldest brother found out that I was talking to someone that was lgbtq online. He then took me on a walk for an hour asking me questions on why I was talking to this person and how i could go to hell if I was. This really made me annoyed as I just wanted things to keep to myself. I Thank God he never told anybody else. Recently, things have started to go downhill again. I started revising for exams and my mom hates me now. She doesnt understand that shouting at me and hitting me all the time makes things worse. After she shouts at me I always feel suicidal but I know I would not have the courage to do that as there is no point - my life would be a waste. I just want to dissapear. I know I will never run away because there is nowhere to run to where I can be fed and have a shelter above my head. I hate some parts of my life but I know that this will not last forever. The moment I move to live in an apartment or house I can do anything I want. Right now I just need mental help and guidance so this does not happen again. I hate it when my mom shouts at me and when my brothers get involved.
Thanks

**Guest** · 03-18-2022, 03:14 PM

Is there actually help out there for adult children of abusive covert narcissist parents? My father died 4 years ago due to diabetes and cancer. Since his death I see more and more the issues with my mom. I used to think I just had adhd and depression from my dad. I used to think I just had poor taste and settled for loser guys but as I've gotten older I've learned and realized I'm codependent as a result of the way I was raised. There was a lot of enmeshment. The more abuse I suffered after my dad died the clearer it became. My mother not only never kept me safe as a child but also welcomed the abuse into the home. When I would ask for her help is was as if I was being punished for something. I still dont know what I dI do wrong. I had a daughter when I just turned 18 who became her new weapon/priority. Fortunately my daughter does not see it for what it is. My daughter still feels so much love and I hope to keep it that way. My mother uses her own age and physical disability as an excuse to get me, my daughter, her mother and anoyone else to do things for her physically and financially. When I became aware of this and decided to become more independent my mother grew angrier that she couldnt use me as much. My mom seems to hate when she cant control me and being called out on her own toxic behavior amd manipulation and excuses. Stupidly I still try to talk to my mom sometimes but then when I do I feel myself go into this whole. This meaningless whole. Like I don't matter. She has my 14 year old daughter. My sister has my dog. What do I have? Really?

**Guest** · 04-17-2022, 05:58 PM

tbh i love my mom but i hate her more then i love her i wanna run away but it sucks cause i cant i have no family no where to go to she took my phone away js for having a boyfriend but when my sister was my age she let her its so dumb and she takes all her anger out on me and abuses me emotionally but i cant open up to no one about it bc no one understands i deeply wanna killl myself but i cant bring myself to do it bc im religious and i don't wanna go to hell so i cant lmfao but yuh im funny lol

**Guest** · 04-23-2022, 07:47 PM

Hi, im a 13 year old. Last year my mom threaten me, that shes gonna threw me out of the house at the age of 12. I tried to get but when she found out she LITTERALY beat me up with my dad. She always bodyshames me. Once I drink or eat she starts to yell at me. When i dont eat she starts to yell at me. I think she wants me dead beacuse she is drowing me to suicide. She also told i was a mistake and i shouldnt be alive. I have two younger siblings. Once when i asked her to buy me a bottle for 4 $ she said no. But the next day she bought my sister a skate for 16$. My younger siblings also hate me. They beat me up, call me weak, say i should die and they wished they never had a sister like me. They guilt trip me alot. At this point i just wanna run away. She also screamed at me for breathing. So i think abt either: running away, asking for help or suicide. My brother has SA me and MY MOM KNOWS IT AND SHE DOSENT CARE.

**Guest** · 05-31-2022, 09:50 PM

my mom makes me want to kill myself. she always degrades me, pulls my hair, yells at me for no possible reason, put me down so she can get up, and always makes sure im not feeling happy. she beats me if i forget to say ma'am/sir after i say yes or no. if i don't excuse myself from the table, she'll yell at me in front of my 5 year old sister. my mother has never felt a need to actually think about what i feel for a second. i sometimes wish my dad fought for custody of me, but no. he had to go of and date the girl he cheated on my mom with. i love my stem mom more then my bio mom. my mother never lets me make my own choices, she takes the things i love away from me, she threatens me with different things every. single. week. the only thing keeping me alive right now is my sister and dogs. my mom is single mother of two daughters and is a work at mom home, so i dont expect her to do thins from stress, and the only disability she has is dyslexia. i am debating on either ending it or running away to my dads.

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