I want to leave but I have nowhere to go

[ccsmod5]

Hey there,
Thank you for reaching out to NRS. We are glad that you are asking for help. It sounds like life at home is truly horrible for you and very harmful to your mental well-being. You deserve to be unconditionally loved and supported for the beautiful human that you are and we are sorry that you are feeling forced into a life of marriage and experience threats and gaslighting often from your parents. That is not right. We are here to help support you as best we can.

Although we are not legal experts here at NRS, but since you are legally the age of an adult in most states (over the age of 18 years old), you are able to leave your parents’ home without parental permission. That being said, we can offer transitional youth shelters for you in your local area that would be able to get you away from home. If you call us (1-800-RUNAWAY) or reach out via chat at 1800runaway.org (click on the “chat” button), we’d be happy to provide those resources for you.

If a shelter is not an option you would like, then perhaps consider if there is a trusted friend or family member that has your best interest and would allow you to stay with them.
You mentioned dealing with depression is the 988 Suicide & Crisis Hotline, dial 988 on any phone and the Mental Health America Agency that can help you locate a local mental health support group at 703-684-7722 or reach out on their website at : www.mentalhealthamerica.net. We care about your well-being, and you deserve to be supported—if these resources do not help, please reach out and we can provide further support.

If you do decide to leave home in the meantime, perhaps consider bringing along your valuable items if you decide to not return back home to your parents. So, if you are seeking a job once you move out, think about bringing along your ID’s, Birth Certificate, medical records, etc. If you take any medications, you may want to think about making sure you take what you have now and plan on how you will get it in the future. We are sure you already considered this, but just think about vital items you use on the daily that, if you were not to return home, they would be difficult to replace.

We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon, our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

Please be safe,
NRS

Hey, I’m a 19 year old girl who hates but loves my family. They’ve abused me when I was little, I’ve been verbally abused too and still am to this day. I cannot live the life I want. They treat me like I’m a doll and they are in control of me. They threaten me and gas light me. I’m already depressed, I was diagnosed with it for 7+ years and my depression came from schools bullying and from my parents. I hate my life. I understand they think thing’s differently since they lived in a different state but I tried to explain how things changed but they don’t care, they want me to be married soon but I’m not ready. I really wanna run away, but I also don’t wanna leave my mom behind. At this point I’m stuck overthinking.

[ccsmod10]

We are not able to give people apartments. We can connect people with shelters or other housing programs in their areas. We believe that everyone deserves to live somewhere safe and achieve happiness and freedom, and will always do what is within our power to help people toward that goal.

For specific housing program referrals, we prefer to provide them over our confidential chat service or over the phone, since the information needed to provide them could be used to identify people. For that reason we prefer not to conduct that over our publicly visible forum.

578 I want to know what your help is towards us do you give an apartment or not
I really don't even understand they are only there to tell us that we have to put up with something that we don't want, for example, there are teenagers who cannot live with their parents and the only thing I hear is that they are still minors and what are they living for?and it is the truth

So I'm 18 years old. Going to be 19 in March. My stepmom wants me to get a job and I've been really trying. But in my town, no ones really hiring. (My town is small and in the middle of nowhere). My stepmom has been slowly getting really toxic to me (I live with her, her brother, my dad, and my 3 siblings. She's also pregnant). She said something today that makes me think they're going to stop paying for food for me to eat. I can't drive and I don't have a car anyways. I have no where to live (my birth mom has two kids with her and is struggling to find a place of her own so I cannot stay with her.) I need someone to reach out with ideas of what to do. Thank you

[ccsmod11]

(If you feel you are in immediate danger for any reason, please call the police or go to your local emergency room.)

Hi,
Thanks so much for reaching out. First of all, we’re so sorry to hear about how your mom treats you at home. You deserve to feel safe and accepted.

It sounds like you might be being abused at home. If you would like to, you can file an abuse report yourself against your mom and an investigation can be launched. This report would be completely anonymous. Feel free to do some research on your own if you’re interested in learning more, or we would love to chat with you here at NRS to walk you through the process.

If you feel safe to do so, we would encourage you to talk to your mom about how you’re feeling and tell her how they way she is treating you is affecting your happiness. You may be able to get a better understanding of where she is coming from.

It also sounds like you might be thinking about leaving home. This is a very difficult and personal decision and we support you no matter what you choose, but your safety is very important to us. If you do choose to leave, we ask that you reach out to us via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-880-9860) to get personalized and confidential help. Thanks again for reaching out and best of luck!

Hi I’m 12 my mom calls me the b word everyday I be. Called that for 12 years of my life I get a abused 24/7 and I’m so tired

Of it and I don’t want to be around her anymore

[ccsmod16]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We are sorry to hear about your situation with your mom. It sounds very difficult and stressful. You do not deserve to be treated that way.

Since you are a legal adult, you do not need to go home. You are legally allowed to stay with someone else. You mentioned not having many other options. If you are interested, we can help you find resources in your area. There are emergency shelters and transitional living communities (this is a temporary, stable living environment with support to eventually live on your own).

It is important that you take care of yourself. Talking with someone you trust can be super helpful along with other coping mechanisms such as journaling, drawing, music, or doing a hobby you enjoy.

We are here to support you 24/7. If you would like to talk in more detail, please contact NRS either by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chatting online through 1800runaway.org. We care about your safety, so if you are ever in an emergency, please call 911.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Be safe,

NRS

I serious help. I’m in a bad situation. My mom is a narcissist and has been extremely abusive to me all of my life and I’ve been staying with my boyfriend but he’s expecting me to go back soon, but I can’t. I’m so scared. I don’t know where else I can go. I have family but they’re all out of town and refuse to acknowledge any of the abuse I have been through and enable it and every time i stay with them I end up getting dragged back home. I’m finally a legal adult so I don’t HAVE to go back, but I’m not left with many choices. I’m desperate and need help I can’t go back. I cant leave town, I need to keep my job so I can save up money. This is so hard

[ccsmod15]

Thank you for contacting National Runaway Safeline. It was brave of you to reach out to get the support you deserve. It sounds unfair that your mother is putting all the responsibility on you and your siblings. Please know that if you are feeling unsafe, we can help you find the resources you need. It might be a good idea to see if you are able to call in or chat online (1-800-786-2929 or www.1800runaway.org). We have many resources that can help you find housing options, legal information, health care, and much more.

You are going through a lot, and we appreciate you reaching out to us. Please feel free to contact us whenever is suitable for you as we are open 24/7. If you feel that you are in immediate danger, please do not hesitate to contact the police (911) to get immediate assistance.

We hope to hear from you soon,
NRS

Hello. I currently live in Clarksburg, MD, with my separated mother and two siblings, both of which are planning on going to campus for college in the fall. I am also in college, but am at the community college near me to try to save money and get general credits out of the way. My mother is extremely manipulative and charges us way too much for a house that is in foreclosure now. She doesn’t chip in and blames us kids for everything, even though we are all working long hours each week. None of us have health insurance, and she refuses to get a full time job to provide benefits for her family. She has dog and cat sitting jobs that are paid under the table in most cases, but refuses to take responsibility for her kids. We get into arguments constantly because we all feel like we are being abused by her so that she can live payment free. I can’t keep this going for myself anymore. Like I mentioned earlier, I’m at college all year round currently to get an associates and then transfer, and she had the audacity to tell me to work full time to get health insurance if I wanted it that badly. My siblings and I are tired of her bull******** and want a way out. I don’t want to be a burden to others and wish I could live on my own.

[ccsmod6]

Hi there! Thanks for sharing a bit of your story with us. We’re so sorry to hear about the abuse you’ve faced from your father. It sounds like it’s been incredibly difficult to plan for the future without the support of your family. We’re happy to help you find resources and explore your options.
One option for housing might be a Transitional Living Program. Transitional Living Programs are a type of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. If you reach out to us over phone or through our web chat service, we can absolutely look into our database to see if we can find options for you in Washington state.
You mentioned that you’ve also considered moving in with your boyfriend, who lives in the United Kingdom, but lack a passport. One option would be for you to get your passport without your mother’s help. Two things you might need for this process are a copy of your birth certificate as well as a photo ID, such as a driver’s license. You would also need to pay a fee. Specifics vary from state to state.
You can also order your own copy of your birth certificate if your parents won’t give it to you. Rules, ordering instructions and fees for each state can be found here (http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/w2w.htm). You might also be able to contact the vital recorder office in your city for more information.
You mentioned that your mother feels trapped in her relationship and doesn’t know what to do. If you feel that she could benefit from some extra support, the National Domestic Violence Hotline might be able to help her. They can be reached at (800) 799-7233 or through http://www.thehotline.org/.
In the end, your own safety is the most important thing right now. It sounds like you feel incredibly lost and unprepared to live independently. You do not have to be alone in this. Feel free to reach out if you’d like to discuss your options in greater detail. The best way for us to help you is over the phone or through our live text chat. We’d be happy to look for local resources for you, such as Transitional Living Programs, legal aid, food banks or other social services. We can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our live chat at www.1800runaway.org. We’re here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
We truly hope to hear from you soon!

National Runaway Safeline

Hello, I’m a legal adult at the age of 19 and I’m trying to find a way to move out of my parent’s house. It’s been unsafe due to my father’s aggression and mental abuse. My mom can’t do anything or in her power to leave him since he’s controlling all of us. I live with my dad, mom, and 2 siblings who are underaged, and I really wasn’t prepare for what is to come when he immediately wanted me to leave. He was going to drop me off in the middle of an empty parking lot with all my belongings so “I can experience” what people have to go through. I have a job, but I only have $300 in my account which is not enough for me to live on my own. I tried every method especially asking my close relatives and friends, but it truly is disgusting how the truth of this world unravels under ‘Family being there for you no matter what’. It’s a lame saying at this point and everyone has to face the realities. I live up here in the state of Washington (NOT D.C.).

I was not prepared well enough for this event. I’ve been living under this situation since I was 13 years old, and yet, I have no one who can teach me the ropes in person to get this right and plan carefully.

My original plan was to move in with my boyfriend, since his family is open to having me, but he lives in the United Kingdom. I’ve told my mother I needed a passport but she kept delaying it because of my father—and she believes my father will change. My father is long-lost at this point so my mom has no excuse to say that. I told her if she wants to stay with my dad and continue life under his abusive ways, then might as well my father will get rid of me and my siblings. But if she chose us, then we told her to divorce with my father. My mother told me she can’t afford divorce papers and such and doesn’t know where to start. All the funds I have went to things I need especially food. But since my work cut hours from me, they are unable to grant my request into working more hours.

I am not entirely sure how to government system works along with this, but my mind works more like a teen than an adult—with the lack of knowledge in that subject of being independent, I’ve been isolated my whole life and not sure what to do to survive

[ccsmod5]

Hi there,


Thanks for reaching out to us, it sounds like things at home have been pretty overwhelming. We hope to help as best we can. We're sorry your feeling this way, here are some option of leaving the home legally if that was what you were looking for. The easiest way to leave home is with your parents permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).


Be safe,

NRS

I’m fifteen, sixteen in april, and i am so insanely done with my family. i literally cannot function there and simultaneously be happy. it’s not possible. i’ve wanted to move out since i was 11 and that desire has gone anywhere or gotten any less intense. i need to leave my house because i’m going insane but i don’t have anywhere to go. i want to live alone but i’m underage and i don’t have any friends who could “adopt me”. what do i do?