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I want to leave but I have nowhere to go

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  • ccsmod16
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We are sorry to hear about your situation with your mom. It sounds very difficult and stressful. You do not deserve to be treated that way.

    Since you are a legal adult, you do not need to go home. You are legally allowed to stay with someone else. You mentioned not having many other options. If you are interested, we can help you find resources in your area. There are emergency shelters and transitional living communities (this is a temporary, stable living environment with support to eventually live on your own).

    It is important that you take care of yourself. Talking with someone you trust can be super helpful along with other coping mechanisms such as journaling, drawing, music, or doing a hobby you enjoy.

    We are here to support you 24/7. If you would like to talk in more detail, please contact NRS either by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chatting online through 1800runaway.org. We care about your safety, so if you are ever in an emergency, please call 911.

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe,

    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    I serious help. I’m in a bad situation. My mom is a narcissist and has been extremely abusive to me all of my life and I’ve been staying with my boyfriend but he’s expecting me to go back soon, but I can’t. I’m so scared. I don’t know where else I can go. I have family but they’re all out of town and refuse to acknowledge any of the abuse I have been through and enable it and every time i stay with them I end up getting dragged back home. I’m finally a legal adult so I don’t HAVE to go back, but I’m not left with many choices. I’m desperate and need help I can’t go back. I cant leave town, I need to keep my job so I can save up money. This is so hard

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for contacting National Runaway Safeline. It was brave of you to reach out to get the support you deserve. It sounds unfair that your mother is putting all the responsibility on you and your siblings. Please know that if you are feeling unsafe, we can help you find the resources you need. It might be a good idea to see if you are able to call in or chat online (1-800-786-2929 or www.1800runaway.org). We have many resources that can help you find housing options, legal information, health care, and much more.

    You are going through a lot, and we appreciate you reaching out to us. Please feel free to contact us whenever is suitable for you as we are open 24/7. If you feel that you are in immediate danger, please do not hesitate to contact the police (911) to get immediate assistance.

    We hope to hear from you soon,
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hello. I currently live in Clarksburg, MD, with my separated mother and two siblings, both of which are planning on going to campus for college in the fall. I am also in college, but am at the community college near me to try to save money and get general credits out of the way. My mother is extremely manipulative and charges us way too much for a house that is in foreclosure now. She doesn’t chip in and blames us kids for everything, even though we are all working long hours each week. None of us have health insurance, and she refuses to get a full time job to provide benefits for her family. She has dog and cat sitting jobs that are paid under the table in most cases, but refuses to take responsibility for her kids. We get into arguments constantly because we all feel like we are being abused by her so that she can live payment free. I can’t keep this going for myself anymore. Like I mentioned earlier, I’m at college all year round currently to get an associates and then transfer, and she had the audacity to tell me to work full time to get health insurance if I wanted it that badly. My siblings and I are tired of her bull******** and want a way out. I don’t want to be a burden to others and wish I could live on my own.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there! Thanks for sharing a bit of your story with us. We’re so sorry to hear about the abuse you’ve faced from your father. It sounds like it’s been incredibly difficult to plan for the future without the support of your family. We’re happy to help you find resources and explore your options.
    One option for housing might be a Transitional Living Program. Transitional Living Programs are a type of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. If you reach out to us over phone or through our web chat service, we can absolutely look into our database to see if we can find options for you in Washington state.
    You mentioned that you’ve also considered moving in with your boyfriend, who lives in the United Kingdom, but lack a passport. One option would be for you to get your passport without your mother’s help. Two things you might need for this process are a copy of your birth certificate as well as a photo ID, such as a driver’s license. You would also need to pay a fee. Specifics vary from state to state.
    You can also order your own copy of your birth certificate if your parents won’t give it to you. Rules, ordering instructions and fees for each state can be found here (http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/w2w.htm). You might also be able to contact the vital recorder office in your city for more information.
    You mentioned that your mother feels trapped in her relationship and doesn’t know what to do. If you feel that she could benefit from some extra support, the National Domestic Violence Hotline might be able to help her. They can be reached at (800) 799-7233 or through http://www.thehotline.org/.
    In the end, your own safety is the most important thing right now. It sounds like you feel incredibly lost and unprepared to live independently. You do not have to be alone in this. Feel free to reach out if you’d like to discuss your options in greater detail. The best way for us to help you is over the phone or through our live text chat. We’d be happy to look for local resources for you, such as Transitional Living Programs, legal aid, food banks or other social services. We can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our live chat at www.1800runaway.org. We’re here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
    We truly hope to hear from you soon!

    National Runaway Safeline

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hello, I’m a legal adult at the age of 19 and I’m trying to find a way to move out of my parent’s house. It’s been unsafe due to my father’s aggression and mental abuse. My mom can’t do anything or in her power to leave him since he’s controlling all of us. I live with my dad, mom, and 2 siblings who are underaged, and I really wasn’t prepare for what is to come when he immediately wanted me to leave. He was going to drop me off in the middle of an empty parking lot with all my belongings so “I can experience” what people have to go through. I have a job, but I only have $300 in my account which is not enough for me to live on my own. I tried every method especially asking my close relatives and friends, but it truly is disgusting how the truth of this world unravels under ‘Family being there for you no matter what’. It’s a lame saying at this point and everyone has to face the realities. I live up here in the state of Washington (NOT D.C.).

    I was not prepared well enough for this event. I’ve been living under this situation since I was 13 years old, and yet, I have no one who can teach me the ropes in person to get this right and plan carefully.

    My original plan was to move in with my boyfriend, since his family is open to having me, but he lives in the United Kingdom. I’ve told my mother I needed a passport but she kept delaying it because of my father—and she believes my father will change. My father is long-lost at this point so my mom has no excuse to say that. I told her if she wants to stay with my dad and continue life under his abusive ways, then might as well my father will get rid of me and my siblings. But if she chose us, then we told her to divorce with my father. My mother told me she can’t afford divorce papers and such and doesn’t know where to start. All the funds I have went to things I need especially food. But since my work cut hours from me, they are unable to grant my request into working more hours.

    I am not entirely sure how to government system works along with this, but my mind works more like a teen than an adult—with the lack of knowledge in that subject of being independent, I’ve been isolated my whole life and not sure what to do to survive

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,


    Thanks for reaching out to us, it sounds like things at home have been pretty overwhelming. We hope to help as best we can. We're sorry your feeling this way, here are some option of leaving the home legally if that was what you were looking for. The easiest way to leave home is with your parents permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

    Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).


    Be safe,

    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    I’m fifteen, sixteen in april, and i am so insanely done with my family. i literally cannot function there and simultaneously be happy. it’s not possible. i’ve wanted to move out since i was 11 and that desire has gone anywhere or gotten any less intense. i need to leave my house because i’m going insane but i don’t have anywhere to go. i want to live alone but i’m underage and i don’t have any friends who could “adopt me”. what do i do?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
    While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
    By all means, if you do fear for your safety either now or in the future, do not hesitate to take the necessary steps to regain your safety. This may mean calling the authorities or possibly reporting the things you may be experiencing.
    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can also try to call out to shelters with you or on your behalf to advocate for you. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    i need to leave my parents house but have no where to go. i cannot live with other family members, i dont have a car and just lost my job today and all i have is some savings for a car. ive been kicked out before and im trying to leave before it happens again because i dont get along with her and all she does is argue with me about anything i have to say and just threaten to hit me or kick me out again and this toxic and crazy ways i cannot deal with anymore i barely leave my room as it is and she always has to know all of my business and i cannot take it anymore if anyone has anything or tips i can use them pls

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out, we’re sorry you have had to handle the situation you described. It sounds like it can be overwhelming. Since you are 18, you are considered a legal adult in most states. Therefore, you can make decisions on where you want to live. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can. Transitional Living Programs usually serve from ages 17 – 24, each program can have slight differences. If you would like us to help one closest to your area call or chat with us so that we can help.
    We look forward to hearing from you.

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hello, I am 18 years old. I am an adopted teen, who needs a backup plan due to threats of being harmed and kicked out. I am about to graduate from high school, and am currently taking a career course that will award me a certificate to be able to work as a Clinical Certified Medical Assistant (CCMA). Are there any options for me to stay close to my school, or am I too old?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time and we want you to know that you are not alone.
    You do not deserve to be abused in any type of way, and we are sorry to hear that you are dealing with this. We understand that it can be scary not to have anywhere to go, one option would be to see if you can stay with any friends or family members. We can also help you look for a shelter or transitional living program.
    We are available 24/7 to offer you support and to help you explore your options. You can chat with us or you can call us at 1800-786-2929. We wish you the best of luck!
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    I am 19 years old my family is mentally an emotionally abusive and has threatened physical abuse but I have nowhere to go and don't know what to do

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS
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