I want to leave but I have nowhere to go

[Guest]

I'm 27 with a job that pays next to nothing, a husband who is as done with me as I am with him and little family or friends. I need to get out of here a.s.a.p but have no where to go and don't know what to do.

[ccsmod13]

Hello,

Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a tough spot and you want to move out of your home. If you are interested in shelter resources while you you find a more permanent housing option, you can go to www.homelessshelterdirectory.org or you can contact United Way(2-1-1) which is an information and referral line for resources/services. The Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD.gov; 202-708-1112) can provide you with your state's affordable housing programs as well as other supportive housing services.

From what you shared, your current living situation is placing you under quite a bit of stress. You deserve to get the support that you need while you take your next steps. If you are interested in counseling services you can contact the National Alliance on Mental Health at 1-800-950-NAMI or use their crisis text line to speak with a counselor immediately by texting "NAMI" to 741741.

We hope this information is helpful.

Good luck,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi... I’m turning 16 next month, and I have had enough of my family. I feel trapped and helpless. I need to get out of here because I fear that I might actually hurt myself. I have tried reasoning with my family, but that doesn’t help at all. My dad is abusive emotionally and physically. He has a mental disorder, and it has really taken a toll on the whole family. He’s been mistreating me ever since my sister was born, when I was three. My mom used to stand up for me, and used to comfort me. She was the “trusted adult” that I would turn to. But now, she seems to have grown tired of everything. She is very depressed, as am I. Unfortunately, she has been taking out her stress on my sister and I. She’s no longer the mother I knew before. She’s constantly yelling at me and going off on me. The littlest things will upset her, like if my sister and I get into a small disagreement. She loses her head all the time. Lately, she’s been very distant. She’s constantly pushing me away, and the only time she speaks to me is when she’s upset. I can’t even remember the last time she told me she loves me. I can’t even remember the last time she’s shown me any kind of affection. One time, she was so angry with me that she wrapped her hand around my next and had me pinned against the wall. I’ve had beatings before when I was younger, but that was most recent and very different. She’s never shown so much aggression towards anyone before. It scared and hurt me. She used to be my savior, and now she’s my biggest reminder of how messed up my life is. I’ve tried to talking to them, but it never works. I haven’t spoken to my dad in 2 months because of his last physical altercation with me. When I was trying to defend myself and get him off of me, he tried to get me arrested. So since then, I haven’t spoken a word to him. My mother and I seem to always argue, and I really miss my old mom. I even wrote her the most emotional letter I have ever written, and she failed to show any emotion other than anger and disappointment. It didn’t feel like a stab to the heart. It felt like she was slowly slicing my heart open. My heart literally hurt. I am completely destroyed. I never seen my life getting this out of hand. I’ve considered removing myself from this world so many times, which made me feel so much worse. They are constantly plotting against me when they think I’m in my room. I literally hear them discussing what they’re gonna do next to punish me. I have absolutely no control and no idea why on what to do. It seems to come down to two options. Leave home or leave this world. I don’t have anywhere to go though. I live in Florida and I’m only turning 16 in a month. That leaves me with little to no options. What am I gonna do?? Please help

[ccsmod2]

Hello, thank you so much for reaching out to us. We are deeply sorry to hear about the situation that you are in. We want you to know that all of your feelings are completely valid and understandable. You truly do not deserve to be in a household that causes you so much pain. It sounds like you have reached out to your mom in such a mature and gentle way, we are so sorry to hear that she continued to stay distant after you wrote such a beautiful letter. It can be very scary to open up your heart to someone and it was so brave of you to do so. Writing a letter to her filled with your true emotions was very big of you, it is not fair that you got nothing in return. We are so sorry to hear about not only the emotional torment you receive but the physical abuse as well. You really do not deserve to be treated in such a way by your parents and it is so terrible that they plot against you and how your mom has changed so much over time. It is completely understandable that you are considering running away or taking your life and we are so proud of you for bringing up these concerns to us.
To begin, we would like to offer the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline as a resource that is available 24-7, free and confidential. Their number is 1-800-273-8255. We would also like to say that if you ever find your life in immediate danger, we urge you to dial 9-1-1 for support. Along with these numbers we would like to offer the number of Child Help which is the National Child Abuse Hotline and their number is 1-800-422-4453. If you ever find yourself in need of a place to stay then the Homeless Shelter Directory is a resource you may be interested in to find somewhere safe to be. You can find the website at https://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/ . Along with this, we ourselves also offer to find resources or information. If you are ever in need of support, guidance or need to make a plan, find shelters, come up with some ideas for next steps or just have someone to talk to then please feel free to call us at 1-800-786-2929.
Again, we’re really glad that you reached out to us. It takes a lot to ask for help and you are trying to figure out your options which is really good to see. You are so brave and we are proud of you. You are a valuable human being and your life is worth so much. We are always here for you, free, confidential and available 24-7 if you want to call or chat with us. We’re here to listen, here to help.

[Guest]

I want to leave because of my siblings but have nowhere to go and my mom doesn't want me to leave but I want to what do I do

[ccsmod0]

Hey there,

18 years old is generally the age that an individual may leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian. We are not legal experts here but we can speak in general terms. If you are under 18 and leave home without permission, your parent/guardian may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city so we cannot predict exactly what would happen in your case. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. However, in that case there may be services (family counseling, etc.) available to you as a youth in crisis/runaway but again, police procedures related to offering those services can be different based on your location or the details of your situation. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.

If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
We hope to hear from you soon.

Be safe and stay strong,
NRS

[Guest]

My family do not treat me right I want to run away but I have no were to go and I want to still finish school but I can’t on my own and I don’t have money and I don’t know what to do

[ccsmod3]

Hi there,

You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your parents permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

Be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

i am a girl of 19 i live in india kerala.. i m horribly depressed and tortured by my parents. i want to leave my home immediately or i will commit suicide by today itself. where should i go?

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline. Unfortunately we are based in the United States. Because we are based in USA our knowledge or resources in other countries are limited.
We are sorry to hear about what you are going through that sounds awful. You may want to consider calling your local police. We want you to know that you are valuable and worth living. In India the Suicide Prevention Line is +918376804102. Best of luck
NRS

[Guest]

im an 18 year old girl from zimbabwe. l am really fed up with life. l am always being shouted at for stuff l didn't do. My guardian has a lot of mood swings. all my relatives appease her as if she was som e goddess so none of them fully understand me. l really want to run away from home because l can't deal with it anymore. my grades are really good

[ccsmod0]

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and we understand it takes courage to reach out for help. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/.
We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

[Guest]

Hi. My name is James. I am 19 years old. I’m a transgender youth from Orland Park Illinois. I cannot stand living with the lack of support in my life, but I am broke and unable to leave the house to get the job I want due to the recent pandemic. My mother would only allow me to have one job she’s approved of and it is not up my alley. I am a college dropout and I suffer from a lot of anxiety and depression. I have autism and was recently hospitalized for suicidal ideation. The doctors told me to get out of this environment as soon as possible, within a few months, if I could. It has been too long since then. I need out. My parents are starting to forget to use my pronouns again and get annoyed when I correct them. A lot of what they and my brother do trigger my PTSD and other issues. It is not good for my health. But, yet again, I am broke, and have no money to pay for transportation, medication, housing, or even a phone bill on my own. Every time I tell them I’m leaving they talk me out of it due to these reasons and the fact that no one would ever take me in. What should I do? I’m starting to lose hope.

[ccsmod15]

Hello,
Thank you for reaching out during this difficult time. It sounds like you are feeling trapped at home and are lacking resources. Although you are not thrilled about the job your mom is approving of, it might be a good idea to take what you can in order to save up money so you can move out and pay for transportation and housing. There are housing groups in Chicago, IL that might be able to help you get on your feet. You can check out the National Homeless Shelter Directory at https://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/ to find other shelters in your area. You can also reach out to your local United Way by dialing 211 to see if they have any specific LGBTQ+ youth shelters in their database.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

I have no money my family doesn't want me around. My friends don't. I have nowhere to go. I feel trapped and I don't even know if I want to be alive. Soon I'll literally have nowhere to go. I've contemplated suicide but I don't want to hurt my mother. I need a refresh but have no money

[ccsmod16]

Hi,

Thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It sounds like things have been very difficult and stressful for you. Your family not wanting you to be around, and contemplating suicide sounds scary. You don’t deserve to be treated this way and we know that you have been very brave to reach out to us and ask for help; that takes a lot of courage.

We hope that you will reach out to us again through our live services, because we address each person and their unique situation with personal service and to focus on options that are specific to you. We can search for shelters for you and listen to you and believe you.

The best way for us to help you is by talking with you through our confidential services, and we are here for you 24/7 either by calling 1-800-786-2929 or via live chat through www.1800runaway.org
We are confidential and are here 24/7 to listen and help.
Sincerely,
NRS

[Guest]

hello l am 12 years old and l want to leave home because l feel like l am all alone and no one wants to hang out with me or be with me.

[ccsmod4]

Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.
We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance.

If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I’m 15 and I do t know what to do. My dad causes stress on my entire family with his aggressive behaviour. It’s like no one talks any more in my house. We yell than stomp off to cool down. We come back just to yell again. I want a break even for a few weeks but I don’t want to make my mom upset. I love her but my dad can be awful. We all just scream until we can’t. I’m afraid to ask my friends to stay with them because it’s embarrassing and my family judges me. I don’t even think my mom would let me stay with someone else because the fact that our family is falling apart embarrasses her. She hates that she married my dad but she’ll never leave him.

[ccsmod3]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Best of luck!

[Guest]

I'm 17 i was told if your parents are split up and you live with and if you leave while underage you have to move with the other but i don't want to move with the other i want to move with a friend or someone else in my family what do i do ?

[ccsmod6]

Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. While we are not legal experts, we do have a great deal of experience working with runaways. It is not illegal to run away. Your parent/guardian could file a runaway report on you but this would NOT mean that you would get arrested or charged with anything. It typically does mean that the police could return you home if they encountered you and that would be that. Some police can be more understanding about what is going on at your home. In our experience, police will oftentimes return the youth back to their guardian almost no matter what. Police typically do not actively search for a runaway youth. However, they will go where the parent/guardian directs them if they know where you are staying. Additionally, police can sometimes be more lenient about runaway situations the closer you are to 18. You can attempt to calmly, respectfully, and persistently deny them consent to touch you or take you anywhere, and they may give up on trying to return you home. They also may not, in which case you should comply with what they tell you to do for your safety. For situations with split up parents, where you live is usually determined by the guardian with custody at the time. So leaving for the other parent’s house might also be considered running away.

If you want to talk more specifically or in depth about your situation, please give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat with us at 1800runaway.org.

[Guest]

Hi, I’m 15 years old and live in Los Angles. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I live with my parents, and I have an ok relationship with my dad, but my mom is always yelling at me, calling me names, invading my privacy, and she has slapped me a couple of times. I feel trapped and depressed and angry. I don’t have a lot of money, I have nowhere to go, and I wouldn’t be able to survive on the streets. I’ve also started cutting myself and thinking I’ll just be better off dead. I feel so scared and unhappy, I don't know what to do.

[ccsmod4]

Hello,

You mentioned some things that raise concern for your safety and well-being. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. It generally ranges from no danger (the youth stays in the home, some services are given, and the case is closed), moderate danger (they will provide family services with possible temporary displacement) and high danger (they will remove the youth from the home and offer certain services).

If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

Another option may be to talk with someone like your father about the situation. It would probably feel good to have him be supportive and provide some level of safety and comfort. Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. NRS is here to listen and here to help. It is also important to practice self- care. Hurting yourself does not have to be an option. There are other positive ways to explore how to cope.
One avenue you might explore is this self-help link we are listing. www.twloha.com
To Write Love on Her Arms is a nonprofit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire, and invest directly into treatment and recovery.
You did a great job reaching out to NRS.
Please be safe and reach out soon by phone or chat so that we may help.
Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

hi I am 19 I have no good relationship with family. I need to get out of here by the Friday!

[ccsmod15]

Since you are over 18 you are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.
NRS

[Guest]

Hi I’m 12 and I have been having suicidal thoughts... I live in Memphis, Tennessee and I have a friend that lives in Michigan City, Mississippi and I think he might let me stay... I only got like 100$ to get there and I have no transportation. ( my bike broke ) I’m always getting in fights with my grandparents and at one point my grandma even said that she don’t want me over at her house... I need help...