im 13 and considering running away

[Unregistered]

I'm thirteen and live in an emotionally abusive household. My parents constantly invalidate my emotions and expect me to be perfect. They refuse to get me any sort of mental health diagnosis, even though I've asked to see a professional about my mental health. My dad always snaps at me at the smallest things, and threatens to take away things that keep me stable(Laptop, my pets, phone, etc) in order to get me to respect him. My mom always defends him and sometimes does the same stuff he does. My younger brother often physically hurts me and my parents say I cant defend myself since hes younger. I'm gay and trans and my parents are openly homophobic and transphobic which really hurts my mental health even more.

I want to run away. I have a plan for it, too, but I'm unsure if its a good idea. I've tried to talk to my family about how they act but they always invalidate my feelings on it and claim they cant be bad since they buy me things.

I live in California and my friend who's a few years older than me from Georgia plans on driving to California to get me as soon as they graduate highschool, which would be in 3 years. We both have plans on how to get money to support ourselves. I see most responses you guys make you say "How would you live and support yourself?"
I have plans of doing art commissions online as soon as possible to earn money, and my friend has a job. I cant call CPS due to intense phonecall anxiety and fear that my parents will know i called them somehow and I'd be punished, Or that my experiences somehow arent valid enough to be considered abuse.

[ccsmod6]

Re: im 13 and considering running away

Hey there,

Thanks for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You made a great first step to finding the help that you may need. It sounds like you are going through a lot and you’re feeling that those around you are not supportive. You deserve to be treated with respect, to experience acceptance and to feel safe.

We want you to know that you are strong for having gone through so much already. It is perfectly okay to deviate from what others or the common population believe to be “normal”. Your bravery and resilience is so admirable. You sound quite resilient for having gone through so much without having the acceptance that you do deserve for just being you. Remember that you are not alone. If you ever want to talk more about what you are experiencing or get additional support we are here 24/7 at 1800-RUNAWAY or our live chat service. The GLBT National Hotline at 1-888-843-4564 is another option to gain great support from those that are familiar with the issues and experiences of those that are also a part of the LGBTQ community. You can access their website link bellow to utilize all the other possibly useful resources they have to offer: http://www.glbthotline.org/

You mentioned that you were considering the options that may be best for you. By all means, if you do fear for your safety either now or in the future, do not hesitate to take the necessary steps to regain your safety. This may mean calling the authorities (CPS or 911) or possibly reporting the things you may be experiencing. We can help with this if you needed assistance. Calling out to agencies can be intimidating for some, but we’re here to help in any way we can.

It is great that you thinking ahead. Should you feel like leaving home is best, it may be a good idea to think about how you will provide necessities for yourself such as food, clothing, showers, healthcare and other basic needs. You may want to also consider how your parent’s will react to you leaving without permission. We are not legal experts here, but typically as a minor (under the age of 1 you need permission from your parents to leave home. It is not illegal to run away, but it would mean that your parents could file a runaway report with the police. This is usually done in an effort to try to return you home as the police are required to do so in most states.

If you can give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY we can try to find some youth agencies that can best help you.

Stay strong and be safe,

NRS