Hi, thank you for reaching out. It sounds like you are being verbally abused by your parents and you never deserve to be treated this way. You deserve to be in a home where you feel safe and are not being abused in any way. It sounds like you have a place you can go if needed, which is always helpful to have a safe place. Though we want you to know that the people you stay with could be charged with what’s called harboring a runaway. It sounds like you are at risk of hurting yourself if you have to stay at home any longer which is understandable given the way you are being treated. We care about your safety and don’t want anything bad happening to you. One option is to report the verbal abuse you have been experiencing to Child Protective Services and we can help with that process if you are interested. If you would like to talk more about what you are experiencing and how you are feeling, please call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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Im 15 and I want to leave my house
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Guest repliedIm 15, and Im being verbally abused by my parents, my mom kicked me out to my dad's house but I still see her every day to go to school, and my dad is very verbally abusive, saying very very hurtful things, I have somewhere I could go if I ran away but Im scared theyd get in trouble, and at this point even if I was put into foster care I wouldnt be mad but if I stay in my parents house any longer I dont feel safe with myself
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(If you feel you are in immediate danger for any reason, please call the police or go to your local emergency room.)
Hi,
Thanks so much for reaching out to us. It sounds like you’re looking for some independence and you want to live on your own.
If you get permission from your parents/guardians, you are able to leave home and live wherever you would like. However, some things may be difficult to do such as signing documents or getting a job since you are underage.
If you’re looking to leave home without parent/guardian permission, there are a few legalities that are important to consider. If you do choose to leave home without your parents’ permission, they could choose to file a runaway report with the police. The police will then find you and bring you home. Although you wouldn’t get in any trouble with the law, there is a possibility that any person you are staying with could be charged with harboring a runaway, which is a criminal charge. This issue goes away once you turn 18, since in most states you will be considered an adult.
The way to get around this would be to get written permission from your parents (an email, text, note, etc) stating that you can stay wherever you are trying to go. That way if they decide to press charges, you have proof that they gave you permission.
There is also the possibility of emancipation, which is its own process involving going to court and proving to a judge that you can support yourself. You would need things such as paychecks from a job and proof of a living space (as well as other things) to do this. If you feel emancipation is something you want to pursue, we recommend doing some research online and contacting your local juvenile courthouse to have your questions answered. You can also think about filing an abuse report if you feel that is relevant to you.
If you feel safe to do so, we would encourage you to talk to your parents about how you’re feeling and tell them how their rules are affecting your happiness. You may be able to get a better understanding of where they are coming from and make a compromise that helps you feel more comfortable at home.
We would love to hear more about your story and give you more personalized and confidential help, but we’ll do the best we can below. Please feel free to reach out to us directly any time to talk to a real person. The NRS is here 24/7 via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-880-9860).
Good luck!
NRS
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Guest repliedI am finna be 15. And I want to leave my house and live on my own or have a roommate
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Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you are experiencing a tough time at home. It can certainly feel overwhelming when home doesn't feel like a safe place. We recognize the strength to reach out and talk about what you are going through.
How long have you felt like your dad has been toxic? Did anything happen recently (or generally) that seemed to intensify your dad's anger? What things have you tried to deal with the situation?
We encourage you to reach out either via phone (1-800-RUNAWAY) or via text (click the “CHAT” button on the top of our homepage). This better allows for communication to ensure you have the information/resources you need to make an informed decision. It generally is more difficult to do this via the forum.
Take care,
NRS
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Guest repliedi am 17 and i want to run from home because my dad is always angry at me and toxic
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Hi there, thank you for reaching out. It sounds like you are wanting to leave home and that one of your parents is also wanting you to leave. Legally, you are allowed to stay somewhere else if your parent gives you permission. It can also be an option to talk with your other parent if they can help mediate things and maybe keep the peace between you and the other parent. If you would like to talk further about your situation or alternative options that can help, please call our hotline or chat us online. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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Guest repliedI'm 15 and I want to leave my parents house and also because one of my parent wants me to leave to.
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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Guest repliedI'm 15 and i want to run away. today i jump on the counter top island and the chicken thingy broke. and now im thinking about running away
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems that you are going through a lot at home, and it is getting worse. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
It seems that you are interested in leaving your home at 15, and you have done so in the past without success. It seems that you want to know if you can leave at your age without getting yourself or anyone else into trouble. Although we are not legal experts, the answer to that question will depend on the city and state you are located in. In many states, the youngest that youth are generally allowed to legally move out is 17 or 18. In some states, young people may file for emancipation. Most states have an age minimum for youth in order to file for emancipation which is generally 16
We can look up legal aid resources that may be able to help you with the process. Please do not hesitate to call or chat if you have questions, need legal resources, or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.
If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please contact our 24/7 crisis support line either by phone or chat.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
National Runaway Safeline | National Runaway Safeline
Call 1-800-RUNAWAY if you are thinking of running from home, if you have a friend who has runaway, or if you are a runaway ready to go home.
www.1800runaway.org
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Guest repliedI don’t know what to go back I can’t go on walks anymore I don’t have my phone anymore and I scared to sleep or ask eny thing of her I tried running but the police just brought me back and I can’t take the yelling or the humiliation I don’t want to go back I’m at a friends house but I can’t stay here and I have until Monday and I don’t know were to go
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Originally posted by Guest View Post15 [almost 16] and wanting to run away here in [redacted].
i've lived with my grandparents my whole life, and they're lgbtphobic [i'm secretly trans LOL]. my grandad is very nice to me and i do enjoy him, but he obviously doesn't know i'm not cishet. my grandmother on the other hand is all over the place with me. she forces me to be religious with her [she is strongly christian], and won't let me be who i am around her. i told her back in november of 2018 that i'm not religious, and she said that 'people like me aren't allowed on *her* property', then asked why i'm not religious, and once i gave her my reasonings [though i don't remember what exactly they were, but i remember saying something along the lines of 'wanting to be my own person' and similar], and then she thought that reason was not good enough and that she 'won't let me become like the rest of my family', and so i forcefully have to be religious and homophobic if i don't want to get yelled at or anything similar to that. she calls me slurs [the r slur mostly, i don't know/remember the others], and said at one point a couple months ago i was 'acting and dressing in a gender neutral way' when i was simply wearing a *sweater*, then proceeded to yell at me and said everyone is going to treat me harshly if i continue this. in december of last year she even threw out or burned some of my belongings because they were 'demonic' when they were literally stuffed animals, and said that if i was to continue to 'interact with these things', that spirits will beat me, torture me r/pe me etc etc and said if that does somehow happen to me she'll 'ignore me when i come crawling back to her' and that 'it's all my fault'. i only have one friend in person, and i secretly have some social medias such as instagram and discord because i've been so, so lonely, and i'm horrified of what she'll do to me when she figures out i have socials since i'm not allowed to have any, i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she figures it out. i want to come out clean about it, but once again i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she knows. i have to start drivers ed in may, but being here is making me so depressed. i've done some light self harm before over all of this, and i don't know of any relatives that would take me in since they're all also lgbtphobic, plus my grandmother doesn't really let me interact with the family. i want to run away so bad, but i'm also very nervous too after hearing that my state is well known for putting kids in juvie over simply running away, and i'm horrified for that. apologies if anything is unclear/misspelled here too, i'm incredibly stressed/worried and all that! i was planning on running away to a youth center [i believe is what they're called], but once again i'm highly nervous to risk all of this.
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Guest replied15 [almost 16] and wanting to run away here in [redacted].
i've lived with my grandparents my whole life, and they're lgbtphobic [i'm secretly trans LOL]. my grandad is very nice to me and i do enjoy him, but he obviously doesn't know i'm not cishet. my grandmother on the other hand is all over the place with me. she forces me to be religious with her [she is strongly christian], and won't let me be who i am around her. i told her back in november of 2018 that i'm not religious, and she said that 'people like me aren't allowed on *her* property', then asked why i'm not religious, and once i gave her my reasonings [though i don't remember what exactly they were, but i remember saying something along the lines of 'wanting to be my own person' and similar], and then she thought that reason was not good enough and that she 'won't let me become like the rest of my family', and so i forcefully have to be religious and homophobic if i don't want to get yelled at or anything similar to that. she calls me slurs [the r slur mostly, i don't know/remember the others], and said at one point a couple months ago i was 'acting and dressing in a gender neutral way' when i was simply wearing a *sweater*, then proceeded to yell at me and said everyone is going to treat me harshly if i continue this. in december of last year she even threw out or burned some of my belongings because they were 'demonic' when they were literally stuffed animals, and said that if i was to continue to 'interact with these things', that spirits will beat me, torture me r/pe me etc etc and said if that does somehow happen to me she'll 'ignore me when i come crawling back to her' and that 'it's all my fault'. i only have one friend in person, and i secretly have some social medias such as instagram and discord because i've been so, so lonely, and i'm horrified of what she'll do to me when she figures out i have socials since i'm not allowed to have any, i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she figures it out. i want to come out clean about it, but once again i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she knows. i have to start drivers ed in may, but being here is making me so depressed. i've done some light self harm before over all of this, and i don't know of any relatives that would take me in since they're all also lgbtphobic, plus my grandmother doesn't really let me interact with the family. i want to run away so bad, but i'm also very nervous too after hearing that my state is well known for putting kids in juvie over simply running away, and i'm horrified for that. apologies if anything is unclear/misspelled here too, i'm incredibly stressed/worried and all that! i was planning on running away to a youth center [i believe is what they're called], but once again i'm highly nervous to risk all of this.Last edited by ccsmod10; 03-06-2022, 01:00 AM.
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Hi there,
Thank you for reaching out to us at National Runaway Safeline. We know that it isn’t always easy to ask for help and we appreciate you sharing a bit of your story with us. We’re so sorry to hear about the abuse happening at home. You deserve to feel safe and accepted in your home. It sounds as though things have been incredibly difficult since your suicide attempt. We’re very glad that you’re still here with us today.
You don’t sound dramatic at all. The situation you’ve described seems incredibly difficult. It sounds as though your mother wasn’t supportive at all when you were dealing with abuse from your father. It also sounds like she’s been very cruel to you herself. It’s completely reasonable that this situation has been hard for you and it makes sense that you feel you’d want to find some way to escape it.
While we aren’t legal experts, 18 is generally the age when one is legally allowed to leave home. If you leave home before you are legally an adult, your mother would be able to file a runaway report. This would mean that you would be returned home by the police if found. Running away is not a crime, but any adult that you stay with could risk being charged for harboring a runaway.
One option might be to report the abuse that’s been happening at home. We can’t be sure what the outcome will be if Child Protective Services (CPS) decides to open a case based on what you share. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly. If you’re ready to do that, we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may also help you to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.
We understand that this situation has been incredibly emotionally taxing. Your mental health is important to us. If you feel that you need emotional support throughout this process, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, or NAMI, may be of help. You can visit their website at https://nami.org/ or reach out to their helpline at 800-950-6264. You can also text "NAMI" to 741741 for support.
It sounds as though you’re worried that you may attempt suicide again. Your life has worth and our top priority is your safety. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. You do not have to face this alone. If you’re at risk of hurting yourself, the National Suicide Hotline might be able to provide support. You can reach them at www.youmatter.suicidepreventionlifeline.org or at 1-800-273-8255 for help at any time.
If you feel as though you’re in immediate danger for any reason you can also reach out to emergency services or 911.
Your life matters to us and we’re here to help you explore your options. You can call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you want to talk in more detail. We’re also available through Live Chat at www.1800runaway.org. We’re here to support you however we can.
Stay safe,
NRS
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