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Im 15 and I want to leave my house

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  • I can’t leave with these ppl anymore they are so mentally abusive I need to leave

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    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • I’m 15 and want to leave my house.

    my father is an ignorant manipulator. He constantly bullies me and give me anxiety and insecurities. I haven’t thought of him as a father for about 2-3 years. He never apologizes or ever tells me that he’s proud of me. I got two jobs and work my ass off just for him, but it’s never good enough and that I just “only care for myself” meanwhile I do almost everything he tells me to do.

    He is openly racist, saying the N-word as a “joke” and humiliated me publicly. He accuses me for stupid things and doesn’t have any empathy. Today, he accused me for staying up at 5am because I woke up at 1pm. I’m highly sure I am hypersomnia, but he would never test me. He uses his persuasive talking into making people believe he’s right, and because I have a speech impediment, I can’t bite back. Even if I were to bite back, he would just yell at me for trying to stand up for myself. He treats me like a slave and never lets me express my feelings.

    To be honest, he gives me thoughts of suicide but laughs about it if I were to talk about it. He’s horrible. No one in my household is there to defend me aswell because they all want to live up to his expectations. He’s horrible and I wish I can run away and never see him again

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with your father. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • I know it sound dramatic, but I really hate my mum, and I want to move out. My dad used to live with us and he was really abusive towards me, even threatening to kill me sometimes, but that wasn't even the worst bit. My mum would never defend me, and would even come up to me afterwards and tell me it was my fault and I should be easier on him. I attempted suicide a little while ago, and when we were in the hospital, she treated me nicely, but i realised it was all just for show, and since we came back home, she has been treating me like ********. I have no privacy, and all of my devices are being controlled remotely by my father, who doesn't even live with us anymore and is in some other country right now. She tells me I am ruining her life, and my brothers and makes me feel terrible about it every day. I am afraid that, should I stay in this household, I will try again. Life does not feel worth living, all because of her. We fight everyday, and I just can't take it anymore. Moving in with friends or family is not an option, as I had to cut off all of my friends because of my restricted phone usage, which made me feel cut off and forgotten about and even anxious, and all of my family live abroad and don't even speak English. Please help, what can I do.

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for reaching out to us at National Runaway Safeline. We know that it isn’t always easy to ask for help and we appreciate you sharing a bit of your story with us. We’re so sorry to hear about the abuse happening at home. You deserve to feel safe and accepted in your home. It sounds as though things have been incredibly difficult since your suicide attempt. We’re very glad that you’re still here with us today.
      You don’t sound dramatic at all. The situation you’ve described seems incredibly difficult. It sounds as though your mother wasn’t supportive at all when you were dealing with abuse from your father. It also sounds like she’s been very cruel to you herself. It’s completely reasonable that this situation has been hard for you and it makes sense that you feel you’d want to find some way to escape it.
      While we aren’t legal experts, 18 is generally the age when one is legally allowed to leave home. If you leave home before you are legally an adult, your mother would be able to file a runaway report. This would mean that you would be returned home by the police if found. Running away is not a crime, but any adult that you stay with could risk being charged for harboring a runaway.
      One option might be to report the abuse that’s been happening at home. We can’t be sure what the outcome will be if Child Protective Services (CPS) decides to open a case based on what you share. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly. If you’re ready to do that, we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may also help you to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.
      We understand that this situation has been incredibly emotionally taxing. Your mental health is important to us. If you feel that you need emotional support throughout this process, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, or NAMI, may be of help. You can visit their website at https://nami.org/ or reach out to their helpline at 800-950-6264. You can also text "NAMI" to 741741 for support.
      It sounds as though you’re worried that you may attempt suicide again. Your life has worth and our top priority is your safety. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. You do not have to face this alone. If you’re at risk of hurting yourself, the National Suicide Hotline might be able to provide support. You can reach them at www.youmatter.suicidepreventionlifeline.org or at 1-800-273-8255 for help at any time.
      If you feel as though you’re in immediate danger for any reason you can also reach out to emergency services or 911.
      Your life matters to us and we’re here to help you explore your options. You can call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you want to talk in more detail. We’re also available through Live Chat at www.1800runaway.org. We’re here to support you however we can.
      Stay safe,
      NRS

  • 15 [almost 16] and wanting to run away here in [redacted].

    i've lived with my grandparents my whole life, and they're lgbtphobic [i'm secretly trans LOL]. my grandad is very nice to me and i do enjoy him, but he obviously doesn't know i'm not cishet. my grandmother on the other hand is all over the place with me. she forces me to be religious with her [she is strongly christian], and won't let me be who i am around her. i told her back in november of 2018 that i'm not religious, and she said that 'people like me aren't allowed on *her* property', then asked why i'm not religious, and once i gave her my reasonings [though i don't remember what exactly they were, but i remember saying something along the lines of 'wanting to be my own person' and similar], and then she thought that reason was not good enough and that she 'won't let me become like the rest of my family', and so i forcefully have to be religious and homophobic if i don't want to get yelled at or anything similar to that. she calls me slurs [the r slur mostly, i don't know/remember the others], and said at one point a couple months ago i was 'acting and dressing in a gender neutral way' when i was simply wearing a *sweater*, then proceeded to yell at me and said everyone is going to treat me harshly if i continue this. in december of last year she even threw out or burned some of my belongings because they were 'demonic' when they were literally stuffed animals, and said that if i was to continue to 'interact with these things', that spirits will beat me, torture me r/pe me etc etc and said if that does somehow happen to me she'll 'ignore me when i come crawling back to her' and that 'it's all my fault'. i only have one friend in person, and i secretly have some social medias such as instagram and discord because i've been so, so lonely, and i'm horrified of what she'll do to me when she figures out i have socials since i'm not allowed to have any, i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she figures it out. i want to come out clean about it, but once again i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she knows. i have to start drivers ed in may, but being here is making me so depressed. i've done some light self harm before over all of this, and i don't know of any relatives that would take me in since they're all also lgbtphobic, plus my grandmother doesn't really let me interact with the family. i want to run away so bad, but i'm also very nervous too after hearing that my state is well known for putting kids in juvie over simply running away, and i'm horrified for that. apologies if anything is unclear/misspelled here too, i'm incredibly stressed/worried and all that! i was planning on running away to a youth center [i believe is what they're called], but once again i'm highly nervous to risk all of this.
    Last edited by ccsmod10; 03-06-2022, 01:00 AM.

    Comment


    • Originally posted by Guest View Post
      15 [almost 16] and wanting to run away here in [redacted].

      i've lived with my grandparents my whole life, and they're lgbtphobic [i'm secretly trans LOL]. my grandad is very nice to me and i do enjoy him, but he obviously doesn't know i'm not cishet. my grandmother on the other hand is all over the place with me. she forces me to be religious with her [she is strongly christian], and won't let me be who i am around her. i told her back in november of 2018 that i'm not religious, and she said that 'people like me aren't allowed on *her* property', then asked why i'm not religious, and once i gave her my reasonings [though i don't remember what exactly they were, but i remember saying something along the lines of 'wanting to be my own person' and similar], and then she thought that reason was not good enough and that she 'won't let me become like the rest of my family', and so i forcefully have to be religious and homophobic if i don't want to get yelled at or anything similar to that. she calls me slurs [the r slur mostly, i don't know/remember the others], and said at one point a couple months ago i was 'acting and dressing in a gender neutral way' when i was simply wearing a *sweater*, then proceeded to yell at me and said everyone is going to treat me harshly if i continue this. in december of last year she even threw out or burned some of my belongings because they were 'demonic' when they were literally stuffed animals, and said that if i was to continue to 'interact with these things', that spirits will beat me, torture me r/pe me etc etc and said if that does somehow happen to me she'll 'ignore me when i come crawling back to her' and that 'it's all my fault'. i only have one friend in person, and i secretly have some social medias such as instagram and discord because i've been so, so lonely, and i'm horrified of what she'll do to me when she figures out i have socials since i'm not allowed to have any, i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she figures it out. i want to come out clean about it, but once again i feel as if i'll be unsafe when she knows. i have to start drivers ed in may, but being here is making me so depressed. i've done some light self harm before over all of this, and i don't know of any relatives that would take me in since they're all also lgbtphobic, plus my grandmother doesn't really let me interact with the family. i want to run away so bad, but i'm also very nervous too after hearing that my state is well known for putting kids in juvie over simply running away, and i'm horrified for that. apologies if anything is unclear/misspelled here too, i'm incredibly stressed/worried and all that! i was planning on running away to a youth center [i believe is what they're called], but once again i'm highly nervous to risk all of this.
      Hi, we're really thankful you're reaching out for help. It sounds like you've been in a living environment that's very stifling, and that your grandmother has been verbally and emotionally abusive, as well as controlling. Having to keep your identity a secret for your own safety can be very stressful, or can literally feel heavy. You do not deserve to have your possessions destroyed or to be threatened like you have been. If you have a relationship that feels safe enough with your grandfather, it might relieve some of the stress to share your worries with him. Additionally, even if they can't 'solve' the problem, sharing what you've been experiencing with trusted friends (digital or in-person) can help relieve some of the anxiety. It is true that in your state the age of majority is 18, meaning that if you did run away, your guardians would be able to file a missing child report; in your state as well there are particular penalties for excessively missing school (also called truancy). While there might be youth homeless shelters in your area, they would require consent from your guardians for you to stay there. If you do ultimately decide to run away, it can be helpful to plan beforehand how you will survive. If you want to talk with someone from National Runaway Safeline, you can live chat with us or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY 24/7. We are also confidential, so anything you share will not travel to anyone you don't want it to. An organization called The Trevor Project specifically provides counseling services for LGBTQIA+ youth; you can also chat with them (https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help/) or call/text them (1-866-488-7386) for support. Because you expressed you've been experiencing some depression and self-harm, you could also try contacting the National Alliance on Mental Illness (1-800-950-NAMI). The nervousness you expressed feeling is valid, and reaching out to any of the above organizations might be extremely beneficial in relieving some of those feelings.
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
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