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Im 15 and I want to leave my house

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  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there, thank you for reaching out to us. We are sorry to hear about the passing away of your father. It sounds like you have gone through some pretty hard times, you are so brave. You don’t deserve to be treated in such a way by your mom, it is unfair that she has left you for a week and that you are running low on food. You also do not deserve to be mentally or physically abused, you are a valuable human being. We are sorry that your mom wants to send you away to live with your uncle so far away, it is understandable that you want to run away.

    To begin, we would like to address the mental and physical abuse you go through. The first reference we would like to offer is the National Child Abuse Hotline known as Child Help, this hotline is free, confidential and available 24-7 and their number is 1-800-422-4453. We also offer help when it comes to abuse by providing the option to file an abuse report, so you may give us a call as well if you so choose at 1-800-786-2929. We would also like to offer NAMI as another option to have someone to talk to about what you are going through and their number is 1-800-950-6264. If you ever find yourself in the position where you have no place to go then we would like to mention https://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/ as a resource to find homeless shelters in your area.

    Again, we’re really glad that you reached out to us. It takes a lot to ask for help and you are trying to figure out your options which is really good to see. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We are also free, confidential and available 24-7 and we are here for not only resources but guidance as well. We’re here to listen, here to help.

    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 15 and I'm thinking of running away my mom hasent came home in a week and I'm runing out of food my mom wants to send me away to Florida with my uncle and I live in California can I get some help please I'm in a centuachin school and I get mentally and physically abused I'm just looking for guidance in life my dad passed away two years ago and he was who I chould go to for help but I'm rining out of options.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi,
    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.


    It sounds like you are in a tough situation with your parent’s not letting you see your boyfriend and being abusive towards you. You don’t deserve to face any abuse. It’s not your fault that she does this.
    Since their decision it sounds like you may be looking for some options to help cope with being separated.

    We understand how difficult it must be for you. It sounds like the two of you are support for one another.

    NRS would like you to know we are here to support you at this difficult time.
    Let us know how we might help, please contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) orwww.1800Runaway.org (live chat).

    We are here to help and here to listen. Sometimes having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My parents are divorced and I live in two separate homes, one with my single mother and one with my father and step mother. My mother is mentally/verbally abusive and I have recently tried getting out of her house but due to legal situations it is not working. My father recently found out that my "best friend" is my boyfriend and we have been with each other a lot, and have been showing affection to each other and my father did not like that I didn’t tell him. He and my psycho mother have always been very controlling over my friends and my social life. My boyfriend is all I have right now because my mother mentally drained my friends, to the point where they didn’t want to me friends with me anymore, and everyone left me. I talked to my dad about giving me freedom if I started being open with him about me and my boyfriend’s relationship, or just my life and we came to terms that we would be more easy going. A day later I asked him if I could go see my boyfriend, and he said no and is not giving me any freedom whatsoever. I haven’t seen my boyfriend in a week and now our relationship is becoming more and more distant because of my controlling parents. My mother is currently not letting me talk to him at all because she doesn't want me to have a boyfriend. I don’t know what to do. I have tried talking to my dad calmly about how I feel about my boyfriend and giving me at least some freedom with everything I have going on in my life, and he never listens and only does what he wants. It is to the point where I am being affected not only at school by my mom and dad, but it is affecting my social life/grades and mental health with my mom being mentally draining and my dad being controlling. I don’t know what to do at all and there is no one in my life I can trust to talk about this stuff with. I am wanting to leave my house because I feel that being independent and on my own would be way better than the situation I have going on now. I have thought about this for around a year now but now it is getting to the point where I can’t take it anymore. This is the second time my parents have broken up a meaningful relationship to me (the last one lasting two years) for absolutely no reason. I also am very close with my boyfriend and his mother and I talk to her about my situations that I would never feel comfortable talking to my parents about, because she is on the more understanding side while my parents are not. I want to continue seeing my boyfriend, and with his mom knowing about my situation, she has always been open to me coming and staying at their place. I have thought about running away/leaving for a long while but I am worried my crazy parents will involve the police and I really do not want to get them involved with that stuff, being such great people. Please help me out. I just want to be left alone.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 02-05-2020, 02:40 AM.

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  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that your dad is treating you in such a hurtful manner. Everyone deserves to be treated with kindness and respect and you are no exception. It makes sense why you might feel so negatively towards them and why you want to leave. It might be a good idea to consider filing an abuse report to CPS or DCFS. If you want to learn more about what that means and what could happen, please contact the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. If you are thinking about running away, we would be happy to go over what options you have and how to go about making a plan that is both effective and safe. If you are interested in having that conversation, please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I feel terrible. Being at my house my dads mentally abusive. I spend month my time in my room because I never want to go and face them. Every time someone puts there hand up by me I get scared and think I’m going to get hit I hate it here and I want to leave

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for taking the time to write us here at NRS. It can certainly be stressful at home when the adults in the household are not supportive. Emotional abuse does get overwhelming and it can be tough to cope with on your own. Abuse of any kind is never okay and not your fault. Doing your own research while thinking about the decision to leave is really responsible and resourceful!

    Generally speaking, your parents are your legal guardians until you turn 18. This means they can decide where you live. If you do choose to leave without permission, your mom can report you as a runaway to the police. Running away is not illegal, but it is a status offense. This means that if your mom knows where you are staying then she can have the police return you home.

    The easiest way to leave home as a minor is with your mom's permission. In this case, she would be allowing you to live somewhere else where you are safe and being cared for. A helpful step is to start reaching out to friends and family members you might be able to stay with. Sometimes having an adult advocate on your side can make communicating your needs more effective to your mom. Perhaps an adult family member or a friend's parent can talk to your mom with you about your experience at home and the possibility of you leaving. The other option you mentioned was emancipation. Emancipation can be a lengthy and difficult process, and in some states you have to be 16 before you can start the process. To be emancipated and gain the rights and responsibilities of being a legal adult (renting an apartment, enrolling yourself in school, working full time, etc) you need to show a judge that you are already living separately from your guardian, you are able to financially support yourself, and that emancipation is in your best interest. Emancipation does often require the full participation and cooperation of your parent. If you would like to talk more about starting this process and the criteria, we can connect you with legal aid in your area. You can call us at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services and we would be happy to find resources for you.

    Child Help is an organization that advocates for young people in abusive and unhealthy situations. You can contact them at 1-800-422-4453 or go to childhelphotline.org to talk more about strategies for coping with the emotional abuse at home and options for having a trusted adult intervene to help. They an also be another resource to add to your support system while you navigate this challenging time.

    We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options.

    Stay safe,
    NRS
    Last edited by ccsmod13; 01-17-2020, 10:23 PM.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 15 and my mother is verbally abusive towards me and it effects me mentally I want to leave home but have nowhere to go I've researched about whether minors can buy there own homes and live without consent from there parents but it only comes up with emancipation and I know that my mum is really deceiving and will pretend to be supportive what should I do??

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod10
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for telling us your story and reaching out. It can be difficult telling others what has happened to you and you are very brave for doing so. Losing a loved one is hard and dealing with all the emotions that come after it cant be easy. Sometimes talking to someone about how you feel can help. You can contact the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) to connect you to mental health resources at 1-800-950-6264 or NAMI.org You may also want to talk to your school because they should have a counselor for you.

    You also mentioned that you do not feel safe at home. If you haven’t already, you could consider reporting the abuse you’ve been experiencing. If you want more information about abuse reporting or if you want to file a report, you could call Child Help at 1-800-422-4453. If you don’t feel safe and feel like you need to get away immediately the Nationalsafeplace.org provides a safe location for you to meet a staff member who can take you to a designated place where you can discuss all options about how to stay safe. You can text 44357 the word “safe,” and your location( Ex: 44357ChicagoSafe) to find a safe location in your area. Once you arrive let someone who works there know you need help connecting with a staff member.

    One service we can offer is to conference call with your parents. This way you could have a conversation with your dad but you would not be alone. For example, it may be hard for you to explain to your dad how you feel about his relationships with other women and how that effects you. Sometimes those conversations go better in a conference call because we can advocate for you. If you want to reach us, you can chat with us anytime at 1800runaway.org or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re here 24/7, and we are ready to listen and help however we can.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I want to leave my house really bad, my dad started dating right after my mom died and even when she was sick. It doesn't feel like home anymore, I want to live with other family member but I have none that is willing to take me. I stay in my room till the ladies are gone, I'm scared to live in my own house and most of them are very rude to me.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. It sounds like you have a tough situation going on at home. It shows a lot of strength reaching out to us and we are here to listen. We are going to talk about a few things and we are always here 24/7 to talk more about any options we bring up and brainstorm more if those don’t seem to fit your situation best. You can always call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us at 1800runaway.org.

    It sounds extremely frustrating to be at home and be yelled at over things like homework and grades. It is not okay to be yelled at extensively over grades when there are better alternatives to having discussions about education. Have you thought about talking to someone within the school about your grades and how to involve your parents in a more positive discussion? That can be an option to think about bringing up with someone you trust like a teacher or school counselor. They may be able to talk with you and your parents in collaboration about how to best address school grades and bring up how your parents have been yelling at you if you are comfortable. You can also think about this option with other people like a friend, family member, or trusted adult. This can help bring a mediator to the topic of grades, but also help bring in a different perspective about how they have been treating you and how that has been affecting you, not only about grades too.

    We are also here as an option too. We do have a conference call service where if you feel comfortable and are able to call us, we can help facilitate a call between you, your parents, and ourselves to talk about what you want to help bring compromise and listening to all sides. We know you mentioned that you aren’t often allowed to have choices, and even if you and your parents are in the same house this is always an option too.

    We appreciate your honesty and bravery with reaching out to us today. We are always here for you to listen and brainstorm what you may think works best in your situation. Don’t hesitate to reach back out if you want to talk further. Best of luck and stay safe!

    Best,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 15 years old and I'm a Muslim girl. Every day, I'm trying to get all A's to impress my parents. Whenever I had missing work, or if I was failing a class, either my mom or my dad would yell at me. My mom said: DO YOU HAVE A BABY RIGHT NOW?? DO YOU?? YOU DON'T, SO NEXT TIME YOU'D BETTER GET ALL A's. NOW GO AND DO YOUR MISSING WORK!! My dad would usually grab me by the ear and start yelling insults in my ear. Whenever I turned in my missing work, but still have a poor low grade, they always assume that I did nothing, even though I was sure I finished it all. They don't give me freedom choices at all. They don't even let me join after-school clubs because I have to take care of my youngest sibling. They don't even let me go to birthday parties at all. I just wish I had more freedom and more
    choices

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us at NRS. It sounds as if you are dealing with something very difficult and it is good that you are reaching out for assistance. We are not legal experts, however we can provide you with some general information.
    As someone who is under the legal age or majority, you would need your legal guardians’ permission to stay with anyone else. If you were to leave without their permission, it would be considered a status offense (similar to breaking curfew). You could be picked up by the police and taken back home. You mentioned that things were getting out of hand, if you feel as if anyone is in immediate danger - reach out to the emergency line for your local police (911).
    Please feel free to reach out to NRS again if you have any other specific questions again, or if you would like to talk over anything. Our 24/7 toll free line is 1-800-786-2929. Again, it is great that you reached out - your school counselor or your favorite teacher/coach could also be great resources.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My mom and dad are always fighting, they bring us, kids, into it, its been hard on us because my dad is not always around and he doesn't pay any bills in the house, he says some means things about my mom to his friends which drive my mom crazy, its been going on for so long I'm just tired and I want to leave my house, my sisters always have mental breakdown and this is getting out of hand right now. If I do leave can I live with someone my parents don't know or are that an illegal

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  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are in a very frustrating situation. It must be frustrating to feel like you aren’t been heard. Maybe you can try to talk to a friend, family member or someone you trust about what you are experiencing. Sometimes it helps to talk with someone and get it all out. Speaking with a therapist could also help. If you ever want to find a therapist you can contact SAMHSA at 1800-662-HELP. If you feel like you are in an unsafe environment you can always contact Child Help at 1800-422-4453 and report any abuse whether emotional or physical. You deserve to be treated with respect and to feel safe and loved at home.
    We aren’t legal experts but remember if you were to run away before you are 18 years old there are risks 18 years old is the age that you are considered an adult and can leave your parents’ home without permission. If you leave now then your mom could report you as a runaway and if the police locate you they would return you home. Also anyone you stay with could run the risk of getting harboring charges. If you want to explore your options you can always contact us at 1800-RUNAWAY. Best of luck!
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