im thinking on running away with my kid

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I LIVE WITH MY DAD and things here are getting worse his temper is out of control and he smashd in a door with his fist when i wouldnt let him in we were fighting and he choked me and he uses pressure points on me to get me to talk i think its time i runaway with my daughter shes 10months old and i dont want her seing him kill me and so i think its time for me to go im 21 going on 22 and im a young mother and i have dealt with him for 6 years and its never gotten this far but this time it went pretty far and i dont know what will happen next time he does this i need to runaway but dont know where to go or what i would do once i did run away i have money but its all in one account his account i have acess to it through password but if i did tht hed be able to trace me and then hed kill me what can i do where i can go to get away from him safely? help please idears? and before i leave im going to lave a messege on why i left with my kid what can i do ? he needs to see tht what hes doing is wrong and it needs to stop and he needs to see it for himself what can i do ?
i dont know what else to do this was his last chance and he messed up and now im thinking of running ill have my stuff packed and all i have no other family members who i get along with and so i dont want them finding me either what i can i do suggestions?

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Re: im thinking on running away with my kid

We’re glad you felt comfortable reaching out to us and sharing a little bit of what’s been going on. It sounds like you’re absolutely justified in wanting to leave home with your daughter. We’re so sorry to hear that you’re dad is hurting you. Home should be a place where you feel safe and don’t have to fear what another person is going to do to you. We hope we can offer you some guidance of places you can turn to for assistance when you do leave your dad’s house.

Just so you’re aware, because you are legally an adult you have every right to leave and no one can make you go back home. It wouldn’t even be considered running away. However, we recognize your fear that your father will find you and hurt you even worse.

You mentioned that you don’t have any other family members that you can turn to for support. Is there anyone in your life that you can think of that may be willing to assist you if/when you do decide to leave?

Although the person hurting you is your father, this may still be considered domestic violence. There are many domestic violence shelters throughout the US. Most of their locations are kept confidential because the people staying there are trying to escape similar situations as you are. There is a National Domestic Violence hotline that could likely assist you with how to leave him safely and a safe place you can go to once you do leave. Their 24 hour hotline is 1-800-799-7233 and their website is http://www.ndvh.org/. On the website is a “get help in your area” section that might be able to point you to an organization near you that could further assist you.

Also, the following website may have a list of helpful resources in your area: http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/fysb/co ... locate.htm. The first group of resources is normally emergency shelters and transitional living programs. It’s important to remember that you may have an additional barrier to finding shelter because you have a child, but that there are absolutely shelters out there for young adult mothers!

We could also look up resources in your local area that may be able to help you. You can either call our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY or if you’re unable to do so, you can post another bulletin with such information and what specifically you’re looking for.

The most important thing is your safety and your daughter’s safety. Remember that if you’re ever in immediate danger, you can absolutely call 9-1-1 for help. The National Domestic Violence hotline website also has a section called “safety planning”. This may be helpful to you when making preparations to leave, including things to remember to bring with you (like identification, important papers, etc). Lastly, many states have petitions you can file with the local court, sometimes called “orders of protection”. It’s kind of like a restraining order, except it’s something you can get faster. For the emergency orders of protection, often times the defendant (person it’s against), does not have to be present. This is obviously something to look into once you get out safely, but just keep in mind as a future option.

We wish you all the best in finding a safe way to leave your dad’s home. If there’s anything you’d like further assistance with, please don’t hesitate to call us or the Nat’l DV hotline. We’re both available 24 hours. Remember, you’re not alone in all this.