My Dad considers beating and threatening me as discipline

[Guest]

This just happened last night. My dad thought that I was being disrespectful and backed me up against a wall and choked me. He told me that if I spoke to him like that again, he would make sure that I’m dead. I really didn’t want anyone to know about this, for both the well being of others and my parents, but I don’t know what to do. I already punish myself by slashing and beating myself in the head, hoping I would never wake up again due to fear. I don’t know if he knows about that. But I don’t want him to find out. Who knows what he’d do. Help?

[ccsmod15]

Hi, that sounds like an incredibly difficult situation, and it was really brave of you to reach out. No matter what’s happening at home, no one has the right to choke you, and you deserve to feel safe at home. We’re not legal experts, but one thing you could consider is child abuse reporting. If you did want to do this, there are a couple of ways you could go about it. You could call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453, and go through the reporting process with them. If you wanted support or assistance while doing this, you could always call out to our number first (1-800-RUNAWAY), and we could call out with you. The other thing you could do is disclose what’s going on at home to a mandated reporter like a teacher or counselor, and they would be required to file an abuse report. If you did decide to file a report, it should open an investigation, meaning the police or a social would likely come to your home and ask you and your parents questions and hopefully find you a place to stay where you can feel safe.

You mentioned feeling like you don’t want to wake up, so it sounds like you may be having some suicidal thoughts. If this is the case, or if you’re having any concerns with your mental health, there are a couple numbers you can call. You can always reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 if you’re feeling suicidal, or even if you’re just looking for some coping strategies. The National Alliance on Mental Illness, or NAMI (1-800-950-NAMI), and the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services, or SAMHSA (1-800-622-HELP) are also both good resources for the feelings you described.

You’re going through an incredibly hard situation, but know that you’re not alone. If you ever need to talk through some of this, or discuss more options, we’re available 24/7. We’re here to help and we’re here to listen. Reach out to us any time at 1-800-RUNAWAY.