Tweet
I'm a 16 year old, bisexual female, my whole life has been filled with nothing but negativity from my mother and father, every single day I've been insulted, degraded, and neglected. My mother, despite knowing of my severe depression and anxiety, still treats me like garbage and openly insults me and talks about me to my siblings, to the point that my younger brother makes fun of me for having anxiety and depression.
When I think about my mother finding me dead I'm filled with so much joy it makes me cry, I don't fear death and I don't have any religious beliefs about an afterlife. I don't hold my relationships or future as a reason to live anymore, I don't care if people will miss me, I don't care what happens to anyone or anything anymore. I know I shouldn't feel this way but I do.
My uncle recently commuted suicide, and at his funeral all I could feel was envy, I wanted that to be me do badly that I didn't even care about my crying, hurt family members. I don't feel human anymore, I want to kill the monster that I am.
my counselor is transferring, and it's too late to call someone so I'm posting on here.
When I think about my mother finding me dead I'm filled with so much joy it makes me cry, I don't fear death and I don't have any religious beliefs about an afterlife. I don't hold my relationships or future as a reason to live anymore, I don't care if people will miss me, I don't care what happens to anyone or anything anymore. I know I shouldn't feel this way but I do.
My uncle recently commuted suicide, and at his funeral all I could feel was envy, I wanted that to be me do badly that I didn't even care about my crying, hurt family members. I don't feel human anymore, I want to kill the monster that I am.
my counselor is transferring, and it's too late to call someone so I'm posting on here.
Comment