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  • Don't know what to do

    Hello to anyone reading this.

    I've found myself in quite the predicament, and I don't know what to do. I don't want to leave either parent for good, but I know I can't stay with them.

    Before I begin with the actual problem, I'm 14 years old, and I live with my mom and stepdad for one week, then go to my dad's for the next week and it switches back and forth except for holidays which are rotated every year.

    My mom and I have never agreed on much, and arguments between us happen often. She hardly ever listens to what I have to say, and if I favor my dad's perspective in any way at all, she loses it, and will refuse to talk to me for hours on end at times. Still, I love her and treat her as the lesser of two evils as I've started to get through to her about what I'm involved in, more specifically, what I'm not involved in, as she used to make me talk to my dad for her.

    When I say my mom hardly listens to what I have to say, my dad is that much worse about it. He always seems stressed, and constantly yells at me. He also tells me that I shouldn't have an opinion because I'm only a child, but insists that I do adult like things, i.e. parts of his job, (creating spreadsheets, advertising for his company, etc.) and making me plan his trips, even if I'm not going, (flights, hotel reservations, rental cars). He argues every chance he can get it seems, and if he asks me to look something up, I can read exactly what an online entry says, but if it isn't what he wants to hear, he'll deny every bit of it until the subject changes. He will also stick to our schedule to the fault of not letting my mother see me even if he isn't home, and will do just about everything to keep me from her.

    I really don't know what to do other than to ask my mom if I can stay with her full time for now, but I also don't think it'll work out in the long run. I've looked into emancipation laws in my state, and I can't apply for it until I'm 16, with both of my parent's consent. Is there any other option for me? Can I do anything at all for myself?

  • #2
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard when there's so much tension between you and both your parents. It's not fair to you to have to relay messages and play mediator for your parents. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do. If you do plan to leave home it's important to make sure that you have a plan in place to ensure that your housing, safety, and necessities are all covered.

    It sounds like your dad is having some trouble listening to you when you are trying to express your thoughts and feelings about the work that he makes you do for his business. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your dad so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    Stay safe,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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