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My mom thinks bad of me and hits me whenever she gets mad.

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  • My mom thinks bad of me and hits me whenever she gets mad.

    I'm 13, and home is like a living nightmare to me. I got into skateboarding a couple months back to relieve stress and because it's fun, ever since then she constantly claims I'm on drugs (which i've never done in my life) and blames everything on it. She gets angry at me for the littlest things, and does nothing but hit me whenever she's angry at me or my dad. It's starting to get to be too much for me to handle, and I'm starting to fall under depression. I try to stay positive but it's hard when you come home to this house. I got detention yesterday, and instead of just letting me deal with the consequences at school, she grounded me at home, and when I said what she was doing was too far she kept hitting me and we got into a big fight. I didn't hit her back, I pushed her away from me once to get her off me. She threw my skateboard at me, told me "Why are you such a ___? You are the biggest ______ I know, this is why no one likes you. Go up to your room and shut the ___up" I just want her to stop, but I don't want to call anybody for it. I don't want to have to move or go through therapy or anything, I think she just needs help with anger management but she doesn't seem to get it. I don't know what to do, because I have great friends in my town that I can talk to this about and that help me through it. Moving or going into foster care would make it so much worse. I'm really confused on what to do
    Last edited by ccsmod10; 05-24-2016, 08:37 PM.

  • #2
    Hello There!

    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway . It is a great first step to finding the information and help that you may need. Taking this step often takes much courage, which shows how strong of a person you in doing so. You are so strong for having gone through so much already.

    It sounds like you are considering your options because you are unsafe a home. We are sorry to hear that. No one should be made to feel this way. Home should be a place of love, support, comfort, and safety. You mentioned that you do not want to call anyone to let them know what is going on. Notifying cps does not always mean that you will be taken away. Sometimes it could be a way to get required anger management help for your mother There is not much anyone, including yourself that could control your mother’s behavior. You can only control your own. If your mother is interested in making some changes and is willing to talk about/seek help there are counseling services out there that could possibly help. SAMHSA( Substance Abuse and Mental Health Administration) at 1877-726-4727 can help locate some of these services or you can call u at we could search our database of possible counseling services in your city and state. Your well-being and safety is a great concern. By all means, if you do fear for your safety in the future, do not hesitate to take the necessary steps to regain your safety. This may mean calling the police or possibly reporting the things you may be experiencing. You mentioned having friends that you talk to. Do you have any other trusted adults, family members, or teachers that you can turn to for support in keeping you safe? Sometimes having them on your side can help create a sense of comfort or support that will keep you safe.


    You are not alone. We can discuss your options with you if you’d like, as well as answer other questions you may have. We’re confidential and anonymous. We’re also here just to listen, if that’s what you need. If you want more information about cps reporting, what that means, or what that can look like for you, we are here to help guide you throughout that process and report with you, or can also call Child Help at 1800-422-4453 that would be able to connect you to your states reporting agency if that is something that you are comfortable doing.


    Best Wishes,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      hi im 21 years old i have a dissability im the middle child i still live with my parent whenever my parents get mad they always yell and hit me they never hit my older and younger sister only me thats is soo un fair it a nightmare i felt alone

      Comment


      • #4
        Reply: Hi im 21 years old i have a dissability


        Hello,
        Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

        It sounds like you are being treated unfairly and with what might be consider abusive behavior.
        You don’t deserve to hit or yelled at by anyone.
        There are laws to protect you from abuse and if you would like to get help NRS can assist you with locating services.

        Let us know how we can help by contacting 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or www.1800Runaway.org (Live Chat).
        You are very brave to reach out to NRS we are here to listen and here to help.

        If you are any danger contact emergency services by dialing 9-1-1.
        You are not alone.

        We hope to hear from you soon.

        Take care,
        NRS

        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          Can My Mother Hit Me For No Apparent Reason

          Comment


          • ccsmod6
            ccsmod6 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,

            Thanks so much for taking the time to reach out to us. It sounds like you may be going through something pretty difficult right now and we are sorry to hear about it. It definitely is not okay for your mother to hit you, whether she has a reason or not. There is no good reason to hit a youth. That could possibly be considered child abuse, and you have the right to report it if that is something you're interested in. You can reach out to the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453 or you can go onto their website at childhelp.org to read up more about what abuse is and what is may look like.

            You can also call into our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We can talk more to you about what you are going through and come up with options together. We are 24/7 so you can call in any time you'd like! We wish you the best of luck with everything.

        • #6
          Hi I am 11 years hold my mom constilny hits me. She twist my arm. And hit me a lot. I want to get help but I am too scared. Advice pls

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,
            Thank you so much for reaching out. It takes so much courage to share what you have shared, and you sound like a very strong young person. We want you to know that it’s never, ever, ever okay for your mom to hurt you. You don’t deserve it no matter what. Please know that you are not alone and that there are options for you. We want you to know that you have the right to file an abuse report with child protective services because it’s not okay that your mom hits you. You can do that by telling a teacher you trust or a guidance counselor at school. You can also do that by calling the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. You can also call us at 1-800-786-2929 if you ever need someone to listen, help you find help, or help you figure out your options.
            Thank you again so, so much for reaching out. We would love to hear from you, so please don’t ever hesitate to call. If you have a minute, we encourage you to give your honest feedback of our forum services at the following link: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think
            Stay strong, stay safe!

        • #7
          My mom hits me when I gets 90 in my test and always compare me to other children.

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey,
            Thank you so much for reaching out. It is really hurtful and mean that your mother compares you to other children, and it is absolutely never okay for your mom to hit you. You deserve to feel safe, supported, and loved where you are. We’re so sorry to hear that your mother isn’t providing that for you. It is concerning to us that you mention your mom hits you. Please know that this is not okay. While we are not legal experts, we can say that you have the right to file an abuse report. You can do that a couple of ways. First, you can confide in a teacher or a guidance counselor, who are mandated reporters and must report any abuse that they hear about to child protective services. Another resource is the National Child Abuse Hotline, which is 1-800-422-4453.
            Another option that you might consider is having a conversation with your mom about how she makes you feel when she compares you to other kids, and what she can do to support you better. Sometimes it can be helpful to have another adult there, like a guidance counselor or a therapist, while you have that conversation. Here are NRS, we are also able to help you have that conversation; one of our trained liners would be happy to call out to your mom with you and advocate for you. Yet another option you might consider is family counseling. If you need help locating an affordable counselor in your area, you can call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration referral line at 1-877-726-4727.
            Thank you again for reaching out. It takes a lot of courage to share some of your story, so we’re glad that you found us. If you ever need someone to talk to or help you figure out your next steps, we’re open 24/7. You can always call. Our number is 1-800-786-2929. We hope this was helpful. If you have a minute, we encourage you to give your honest feedback of our forum services at the following link: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think Your feedback really helps us serve young people like you  Good luck and stay safe!
            Last edited by ccsmod5; 03-28-2018, 06:44 PM.

        • #8
          Hi my name is Sarah and I’m 13 years old, I don’t think I’ve seen any mother hit their kids as hard as my mom does. My mom has been abusive my whole life. I’m usually very depressed most of the time except at school because my mom isn’t there and my friends are there. My mom hits my sisters and I and I want to help my sisters but I know that I will get hurt even more than them. I don’t think my dad really notices because he’s always at work but I love my dad so much. He never gets mad with me and he’s my favorite person ever. I never cause trouble but I’m not doing that good in school. My mom is by far the worst human I’ve ever seen. I’m typing this right after she dragged me to the ground, pulled my hair to the point where I feel like it’s gonna completely get ripped out of my head, and she punched and slapped my face extremely hard. This happened because I got really mad for my mom taking my phone and my ipad. And there’s been much much worse of from what she’s done. I never ever hit my mom or say bad words to her. I want her to go to jail or something but i just don’t really know what to do. I definitely don’t want a foster home and I still want to live with my dad. I’m so confused on what to do and I really want to do something about it because my mom has been ruined my life

          Comment


          • ccsmod11
            ccsmod11 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey there,

            Thank you for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you have been experiencing extreme physical abuse from your mother, and we are here to help in any way we can.

            You said that this abuse is frequent and your mother has done this to you for your whole life. We want to let you know that abuse is never acceptable. If you ever feel in immediate danger, please call 9-1-1. Child Help, the national child abuse hotline, may be a helpful resource for you. Their phone number is 1-800-422-4453 and their website is childhelp.org. They will walk you through the steps of filing an abuse report. If you are interested in doing this but not comfortable with doing it on your own, you are also welcome to call us here and we will call Child Help along with you. Our phone number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), and we are completely confidential and available 24/7.

            You mentioned that you love going to school because your friends are there. That is great that you have a community of people you are happy to be around. Your school counselor or a trusted teacher may be another good resource for you. Expressing your struggles to them may also help for them to understand an external pressure that is negatively affecting your schoolwork. Please do keep in mind that school personnel are mandated reporters, and if you tell them about your abuse, they will have to file a report with the police. It sounds like this may be something that you are interested in, so that could be another way to approach the reporting.

            You said that you love your dad and would want to stay with him. It might be helpful if you are able to have a private conversation with him about this ongoing struggle with you, your siblings, and your mom. This can be a difficult conversation to have, and we here at the NRS provide have a conference calling resource. To use you would call in to us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), talk about your situation, and then call out to whomever you want to have a discussion with, in this situation perhaps your dad. We act as a line of support for you and do our best to keep the conversation productive and compromise-driven.

            We are here to talk through these options or any others with you. Once again, our phone number number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), and we are a completely confidential safeline available 24/7. We’re here to listen, here to help.

            Best of luck,
            NRS

        • #9
          I am 14 years old whenever I do something wrong. the littlest thing my my yells at me and slaps me. One time I ran away because she pulled my hair and punched me and slapped me just because I forgot to call my teacher to makeup a test. The next day they found me and said she wasn't going to do that again it didn't happen for 6 months then I forgot to do my homework and my teacher called my mom and my mom was so angry at me, she started to punch me and hit me again.

          Comment


          • ccsmod11
            ccsmod11 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you’re having a lot of problems at home, and to a lesser extent at school. We hope that we can help out.

            We want to let you know that your mom has no right to hit you. No matter what you may have done or not done in school, your mother should not be putting her hands on you to harm you. This is in no way your fault, and we want you to know you deserve to live in a safe and comfortable environment. We are able to file abuse reports to CPS, and we can talk with you about your situation if you want to. Just call us at 1-800-786-2929 in order to do this.


            We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum.** Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: **https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think.
            -NRS

        • #10
          My mother always hits or kicks me repeatedly and my father is on a buisness trip and his phone doesn’t work so i have no one to talk to I would cry repeatedly for hours on how much it hurts I even have a permanent mark on my nose from when she throws things at me she has even called the police on me 2 or 3 times now and I explain what happened and they don’t listen they all think I’m lying being she is “superior” to me it honestly makes me depressed and I think of harming my self the only person who understands me is my father I am contstantly bullied at school of all these resina I think. Of calling the police but I don’t have the guts to do it if anyone has advice please

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,
            Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like you’re in a very scary situation and we’re glad that you reached out for support. It takes a lot of courage to share your story. You don’t deserve to be abused and we’re so sorry to hear that the police did not recognize your situation for what it is. We encourage you to reach out to adults that you trust, like a teacher or a guidance counselor. Teachers and guidance counselors are mandated reporters, meaning that they must report any abuse they hear about to child protective services. In addition, you can also call the National Child Abuse Hotline for more information about what the process of reporting abuse looks like and what might happen if you do report. Their number is 1-800-422-4453. They can also talk to you about the possibility of having custody of you transferred to another person (like a family member) if you think that might be an option. It might also help to document any instance that your mom hurts you, either by writing down what happened or by taking pictures of any marks or bruises she leaves.

            You also mentioned that you think about hurting yourself. You don’t have to go through these feelings on your own. There is help out there. If you ever feel like you’re in immediate danger of hurting yourself, you can always call 9-1-1. Another resource that might be helpful is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. You deserve to be supported!

            Thank you again for reaching out. We hope this was helpful and we encourage you to reach out by phone if you need additional resources or need help figuring out your options. Our number is 1-800-786-2929 and our lines are always open. If you have a moment, we'd appreciate your feedback of our crisis services at the following link:
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think
            Stay safe!

        • #11
          My mom hits me and I don’t like it it hurt a lot and I don’t like being hurt I am 12 years young and I am hit from mother because I am gay my name is ********. Can someone help.
          Last edited by ccsmod11; 05-04-2018, 07:01 PM.

          Comment


          • ccsmod11
            ccsmod11 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey,

            Thanks for reaching out. You do not deserve to be hurt in anyway at all, especially for being gay. Recognizing that it is wrong that your mother is not treating you the way you deserve and asking for help shows a lot of courage.

            Child help is the National Child Abuse Hotline that can help report your mother and talk to you about the process and answer any questions you might have. You can call them at 1-800-422-4453 or look at their website at childhelp.org.

            There are several hotlines that assist folks who are going through struggles like yourself that might be helpful, LGBT National Hotline 1-888-843-4564 and LGBT
            National Youth Talkline 1-800-426-7743.

            Finally, you can always call or chat us to talk more about what’s going on. We are confidential and can provide support, because you are important, and like all the people above, are here to help. We’re available 24/7.

            Again, thanks for reaching out. It takes a lot to ask for help and you are trying to figure out your options which is really good to see. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We’re here to listen, here to help.

        • #12
          My mother has never understood my feelings, my emotion and she always says so casually that I cannot have any depression. I bring depression on my own wish. I am depressed because my mother don't like my boyfriend she always says abusive word against my boyfriend and hit me with sharp weapon like bettlenut cutter or knife. How I will meet with my boyfriend whom I love .How to tackle this woman?
          Last edited by ccsmod4; 05-18-2018, 04:13 AM.

          Comment


          • #13
            Reply:My mother has never understood my feelings

            Hello,
            Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

            We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
            We are sorry to hear that things are not well between you and your mother.
            It would be nice if she could acknowledge your feelings because they are important.
            It is also unfortunate that she has hit you with objects and speaks badly of your boyfriend. Neither of you deserve that. It is not your fault that she does these things.

            We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

            If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.
            We hope to hear from you soon.

            Take care,
            NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • #14
              Hello, I'm a 15 year old female that needs help in my family situation. In my family my mother is a wonderful caring person but... she doesn't belive in any sort of mental illness and I'm sure that I have some form of depression and I really want to go to some therepy because I think it would be very benifical and I didn't know how to start the conversation so I went to my conseler and she was quite helpful but my mother denied that I needed any sort of help.. and my father often yells and screams and calls names and punches items in the house and has only a few times smacked me in the head. I feel I need to leave my situation but I don't know how my mother has started crying often because he yells at her so bad I've been trying to look at runaway shelters but I don't know how that's going to work as you need permission to stay there

              Comment


              • ccsmod2
                ccsmod2 commented
                Editing a comment
                Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand that it takes courage to seek help. We are very sorry to hear about the way in which your parents have been treating you. Mental illness is a real issue and it is very brave of you for wanting to get help. You mentioned that your father has emotionally and physically abused you. Abuse is never okay and you don't deserve to be treated that way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help (1-800-422-4453 ) www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody. Please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat if you have any questions or just want to talk.

            • #15
              im 11 years old. whenever my mum says not to do anything, its always something silly . but then i do it and forget she said not too. then my mum always screams and shouts in my face and sometimes hits and smacks me . i don't know what to do, please help me . i have no phone too call your number ... thank you .

              Comment


              • ccsmod8
                ccsmod8 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hello there -

                Thank you for taking the time out of your day to get into contact with us here at the National Runaway Safeline, we are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. From your message to us, it sounds like your going through a very hard time right now and seem to be very overwhelmed with everything that is going on especially if your mother keeps yelling and screaming at you. It must be very frustrating to feel a little helpless right now. No one deserves to go through something like that.

                It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and we understand it takes courage to reach out for help. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources (youth shelters) and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: http://www.childhelplineinternationa...where-we-work/.

                We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.
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