Is it safe for me to call cps on my dad?

[Guest]

My father terrifies me. He has hit me before and was extremely abusive to my mother when they were married. My father has primary custody over me and my two sisters but only because I lied for him in court. I was scared of what he would do if I didn't. The one time I was somewhat honest he found out and flipped, I was so scared but he wouldn't stop yelling, he made me call the mediator (who I was honest with) the next morning and tell her I was just angry with him and I didn't mean it. He would manipulate me into thinking my mother didn't love me and that she was only in court to save face in front of her family. He's always been an abusive liar. Right now, my mom is trying to help by putting my sisters and me under her restraining order and then call cps once it's safe. I can't shake the feeling that if the restraining order doesn't go through he may be angry and hit me again. If it doesn't work I may be in danger. Even if it does work, I don't want another long, drawn-out custody battle. During the last one I attempted suicide and I don't want that again. I don't know if I would be taken from his care immediately or not. Please, answer my questions and help me.

[ccsmod15]

Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you’ve been going through such a tough time. We want you to know that no one deserves to be abused, and you should not have to go through that. We are here to support you and help you in any way we can.

Your safety is definitely a priority. If you haven’t already, you could consider reaching out to a trusted adult, relative, worker/teacher/counselor at your school for help and support. They may be able to help you brainstorm ways or places to stay safe. And if you ever feel that you are in danger, you could call 911 for immediate help. You could also go to this website to find a safe place near you: https://www.nationalsafeplace.org/.

It sounds like you have been considering making an abuse report. If you want more information about abuse reporting or if you want to file a report, you could call Child Help at 1-800-422-4453 or you could call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us online. It can also be helpful to take pictures or videos of things happening at home to have as proof if a case is opened.

We also want you to know that you are worth it and that there is hope for you. If you ever again feel that you are in danger of hurting or killing yourself, you could call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255; suicidepreventionlifeline.org) or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us online. Also, if you want further information about mental health resources, you could check out the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA); 1-877-726-4727; samhsa.gov; findtreatment.samhsa.gov/ to find resources near you.

We also have legal aid resources in case that would be helpful to learn more about the legal side of the restraining order.

There are also many resources that could help you with anything else you may need. If you want to talk more about what’s been going on, or if you would like more information about resources, you can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us online. Again, thank you for contacting us. It sounds like you’ve been going through a really hard time, but you’ve shown a lot of strength by working through these challenges and reaching out for help. If you ever need anything in the future, please feel free to call us or chat with us online. We’re always here to listen and here to help.