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Calling CPS on my parents..?

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    im a 13 year old transgender boy from Atlanta, my parents are awful to me. they're unsupportive and refuse to listen to my psychiatrist and therapist. they constantly nit pick at me for every little thing whether its my appearance, something i say, the way i act, etc. they've prompted my self harm, suicidal thoughts, and thoughts of running away. my dad put a hole in the wall behind my door from slamming it open and he's gone thru my room and thrown everything away. my mom threw all my clothes away and bought girls clothes that she keeps in her bedroom. they made me take out my lip ring, and change my appearance to how they want it to be. i have little contact with any of my friends. they wont even let me shower on my own, because they dont trust me. CPS has been called on them before and i want them to take me away so badly. i hate it here, i just want an escape. at this point i feel my only options are the get CPS called on them again, run away, or commit suicide. i feel unsafe and extremely unhappy here, i have no privacy at all even online and im not allowed to have a social life. i want help, im scared.

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  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks for reaching out to us. Sorry to hear that things have been difficult at home. Home should be a comfortable and safe environment, and it sounds like you aren’t getting that right now. It is wrong for someone to hit you, and you do not deserve to be treated this way by your parents. Parents should act supportive, especially when you are going through difficult times. It makes sense that you feel belittled when they treat you this way. It is good that you have your siblings and online friends to be supportive of you. It may also help to seek out trusted adults that can help you. This could be a school counselor, a teacher, or another relative like an aunt or uncle. Ultimately you cannot control your parents’ actions. But, people like social workers can help you react in a way that may make things better.

    You mentioned your mom hitting you, which is never okay. It is understandable to be nervous about contacting CPS, but ultimately your safety is the most important thing. If you decide to file an abuse report, you can contact our hotline (1-800-RUNAWAY) or go to Childhelp.org for help filing the report. It also sounds like you are thinking about leaving home. Again, your safety is the most important thing, and it is important to have a safe plan, like where you would go and what you would do. We highly encourage you to call us on our hotline to make a safety plan if you are thinking about leaving home. It’s difficult when you feel like your parents aren’t being supportive. Hopefully taking steps like reaching out to trusted adults for help and continuing to lean on friends for support will help. We are here 24/7 if you need us, thanks for reaching out.

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm a 15 year old guy, and my parents are in their early forties. for about four years now my parents have treated me much worse than my siblings and I just want out, but I also feel like I'm overreacting about this and If I tell anyone about this then my parents are gonna hear and things are gonna get worse. for about three years until about a year ago my mom would hit me over the dumbest things and call me a baby when crying cause she's hitting me for reasons such as not eating all of dinner because I'm full and locking me In the garage because of it. things just as drastic as this have happened until about a year ago when we recently moved and my mom was joking about my bad Spanish (she's fluent) based on my bad grades. when I leave the room to escape her laughing with my dad at me she pulls my ear pretty hard so I lightly brush It off and say that It hurt. She screams at me saying I hit her and just starts slapping me and yelling and saying how disrespectful I am and other things I can't remember. after about an hour of screaming at me for "hitting" her I finally start yelling back and after about an hour or two she, for the first time ever, was reluctantly convinced that hitting me wasn't okay, but was Insistent that I had hit her, which I'd never do since that's what happens If I do. after that night, I don't think she's hit me since but she's found other ways of making me feel awful such as random comments of belittlement and random sparks of bad attitude that lead to the whole family having a trashy day. I In the past year have turned to online friends since I rarely get to see IRL friends anymore since I'm constantly grounded. and I've gotten Into the habit of waking up late doing everything I'm told to do, even If It's never enough, and wait until everyone Is asleep so I can hang out with people I enjoy being with. Anytime they catch me staying up even If it's Christmas break or a Saturday and I wake up on time they only care about the fact that I'm choosing to talk to people when no one else Is around. The reason being that I can't be myself around my parents, my feelings are denied and I don't believe In a lot of wat they do which Is fine but It turns to judgmental belittling about topics that apply to me and when I try to talk about It I get screamed at and told that It isn't how I feel or whatever the case may be. I've had a panic attack at school before and when I told my mom on the drive home she without question laughed and said that I didn't, didn't even ask me anything. most of the tension between me and my parents stems from me being up and my trash grades which aren't getting better and I've resorted to just not doing It properly because I realized I'm wasting my time. My mom Is generally the worse parent but as soon as I mess up or forget something or anything my dad Is the one to make my head hurt by screaming. I genuinely care about them and have tried to connect with them through things I enjoy doing such as card games but ultimately end up having them yell at me cause of a rule and leave the table. My siblings are pretty great In general tbh and I'm super glad that I have them. I don't know If calling CPS Is the right thing plus I don't wanna ruin the family or cause them to be unable to keep a job and make life for my five siblings as bad as how they treated me or worse. I want a peaceful way out but I doubt that's even possible.

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  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there. Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you did. It sounds like you're in a tough spot and trying to find the best way to let your mom that you're no longer interested in living with her. Because you're legally an adult, making that step is entirely up to you. It's definitely understandable to be concerned about your children's health if they're being exposed to secondhand smoke. Communicating with your mom about how you're feeling might be a good starting point, perhaps even directly asking her if she can avoid smoking in your home. If you're in a space where you firmly no longer want to live with her and she refuses to leave, it might be a good idea to look up your state's information on evictions. Many times if you live somewhere colder, you cannot legally evict someone during the winter months. If you have a lease, it's also a good idea to review it and have an understanding of who is on the lease. If both of you are, unfortunately you won't be able to just kick your mom out. The lease is a binding agreement that both of you signed. Another option might be for you, your fiancé, and your children to move. Either way, it sounds like communicating with your mom might be a really good starting point for you to determine next steps.

    Good luck.

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi there I'm a 27 year mother with two kids. I have a mother in law who treats me like ********. She calls me names like **********, stupid, and a ********ing moron. She acts like I'm stupid. Not only that she smiles in her room where the boys like to go in and talk to her. I dont think she realizes that she is causing secondhand smoke. She claims that she is worried about their health but I'm most certainly am.

    When my mother was pregnant with me she smoked that's how I know about my health problems. But my kids health is my concern. I need to know what I can do to help my kids get away from their grandmother who lives with me and my fiance. I need help

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    replied
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services. Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

    If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe and stay strong,

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm a 14 year old girl turning 15 on January 1st, I've lived with bulling ever since I started school. Recently the best family I had Died due to brain cancer that could not be operated on. This summer I was diagnosed with severe depression and i'm on 50 mgs of anti-depressents they don't help. I have two cats who help calm me down when I'm emotionally struggling. My parents have two children, me and my sister who is 5. I've been told everything is my fault and It's just mentally busing me I get called names by my mother and my father likes to tease me which does hurt me. I've gotten to the point where I planned my suicide several times but I don't due it because of my boyfriend. I've been with him for almost 3 years now and he helps me but, once I go to that place of denial I can't get out of it. I don't know what to do at this point, I think suicide is the option but it isn't. Do I call CPS and make a report does this count as child in dangerment? Most of the things I have my parents bought would I be able to keep them or not? I really don't want to loose contact with my boyfriend. Please help me in this situation.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,
    Thanks for reaching out to us. We are so sorry to hear that your siblings have had such a tough time with your mom. It sounds like you have been concerned about your siblings for some time, and you have questions about who to report to anonymously. It is never ok for anyone to make your siblings unsafe, and it sounds like they have a good source of support with you.

    You have the option of filing an abuse report with your local child abuse organization, and you can discuss your concerns about being identified with the person taking the report. Being anonymous when you report does not make the report any les valid. When anyone makes a report, the most important factor is to make sure you are able to provide as much detailed information as possible about the incidences of abuse that you have observed. Organizations like Child Help can help you identify the child protective services organization near you if you feel comfortable reaching out to them directly. They can be reached at 1-800-422-4453, or by visiting their website at https://www.childhelp.org/ . You can also reach out to us if you want to talk about what’s been going on. We can also help you file the report if you would like our support in doing so.

    Please know that we are here to support you. We cannot tell you what to do, but we can do our best to share resources that can support you in figuring out the next steps you can take to help your siblings stay safe. You can reach us 24/7 by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), or via chat by visiting our website at https://www.1800runaway.org/ . We are here for you. Stay safe!
    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm worried about the safety of my siblings. I have four siblings, the middle three are adopted, the littlest is my only biological sister. The middle and adopted three are 2 boys, 11 and 13, and a girl, 8. I am the oldest and my parents are biologically mine. The three middle sibling are mistreated by my mom almost on a daily basis. She'll get mad at them for no good reason. Ex: playing an educational school game they are required to play by a teacher. She slapped both of my brothers across the faces and left them both in tears when this happened. Often times my 11 year old brother, who is emotionally sensitive, will begin trembling, crying, and has trouble breathing like he will pass out when my mom treats him this way. My mom has pinned down my 8 year old sister and beat her up over a lie she told. The sad thing is that my mom treats her biological children, my littlest sister and I perfectly fine. I'm worried that her treatment of my adopted siblings is becoming dangerous to them. Them getting slapped, punched, choked, and shoved is a normal thing, though not quite daily. My dad is mostly kind to them but sometimes will lose his temper at them. He is at work a lot though. I just am not sure who I can talk to this about who won't tell my mom I have done so.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    Thank you ever so much for reaching out to us. We are so sorry to hear that things at home with your parents has become so painful, both emotionally and physically for you. We want you to know that you deserve to live in a space where you feel safe, and it is never ok for anyone to place your safety in jeopardy. Please know that while we cannot tell you what to do, we will do our best to share information that may be helpful.

    It sounds like you haven’t felt supported at home with your parents, and you’ve self-injured as well as contemplated suicide. We want you to know that there are organizations, much like ours, that are available if you wish to talk about what you’ve been experiencing. Organizations like The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, available by phone at 1.800.273.TALK (8255) and by visiting https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ , are there to provide you support when you’re in a crisis. You’ve mentioned instances where you’ve been hit and been made to feel unsafe at home. You have the right to report anyone that is hurting you to your local child protective services, regardless of your religion. It is not ok for anyone to hurt you or make you feel unsafe. Know that organizations like Child Help, available by phone at 1.800.422.4453 as well as at https://www.childhelp.org/ can help you identify your local child protective services office if you feel comfortable making an abuse report. You also discussed concerns that you may be depressed. It is really great that you’ve been so proactive to check in on yourself by trying some self-assessments online, and we would encourage you to explore whether there are mental health resources in your area that can support your efforts to find out whether you are clinically depressed. Organizations like the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), available by phone at 1.800.950.6264, by texting NAMI to 741741, or visiting them online at https://www.nami.org/Home , can help support you as you explore ways to take care of your mental health. Much like us at the National Runaway Safeline, these organizations are here to support you. Please know that you are not alone.

    Whatever you decide, we will do our best to support you and help you stay safe. You are welcome to reach out to us if you need help identifying resources that can support you, or if you are in a crisis and need someone to talk to. We’re here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!

    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I retook it:

    26 points


    Scores 20 and greater suggest severe depression; patients typically should have immediate initiation of pharmacotherapy and expedited referral to mental health specialist.

    Functionally, the patient finds it is “extremely difficult” to perform life tasks due to their symptoms.

    WARNING: This patient is having thoughts concerning for suicidal ideation or self-harm, and should be probed further, referred, or transferred for emergency psychiatric evaluation as clinically appropriate and depending on clinician overall risk assessment.


    Gosh, I'm so sorry for derailing this thread. Please feel free to leave my additional comments out! It's just for some background info.

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    This is the 16 year old female again, I wanted to add something:


    (EDIT: I've never been diagnosed for depression. I'm not sure that I deserve that. I took a PHQ-9 questionnaire on September 10, 2019 and had a 17/27 and was told "that moderately severe clinical depression is likely". I've become worse since then so I'll retake it and see what the score has become.)

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm a 16 year old female. My days consist of being berated, hit, and verbal, mental, as well as psychological abuse. I have other siblings but they do not suffer, I'm the black sheep of this family. I began self harming through cutting in 2018, at 13 years old. There were some "off times" where I resorted to hitting or biting myself due to not having access to blades, however I have started cutting once again with countless blades and a utility knife. I have suicidal ideation everyday, and have attempted suicide multiple (secret) times, but I have come to the conclusion that I will not kill myself due to my devotion to God, no matter how much I want to. Alas, I still engage in self injury and mutilation and I aim for the brink of death, but not quite death in itself.

    I've expressed my wish to commit suicide only two times before, both at 12-13 years old, begging my parents on my knees to love me and understand me.
    "Do it." was the reply. They thought I wouldn't.

    This issue is only with my parents. My extended family, primarily on my mother's side, love and cherish me. Unfortunately, they're across the world in a different country, and I've seen them only once in 7 years.

    The reason I have never reported anything is because I always held on to the hope that when I woke up one day, we'll all get along well. My parents would ask how my day is going then I'd sit down at dinner for a meal with my family; laughing together. That I wouldn't be told to go to hell, that I wouldn't be cursed at and hit when trying to explain myself. That my bitter days would be left in the past.

    Another reason I'm afraid to report is due to my religion. No, it's not my religion that's holding me back, but people's misconceptions. I love my God, as you know now, the reason why I won't end my life. Religion plays no part in this, I'm not forced to do anything that has anything to do with belief, but what will people think when they see a girl like me? I don't fit the mold.

    I've woken up from my delusion now. I'm the villain of my family, no matter what I do. I would run away, but I live in a bad area and I'm sure I'd show up dead. Even after anything, I want my family to live pleasantly without me. I don't want this to be something that weighs on their mind, that I'm such a burden, and for this to darken their days. But I'm sure their quality of life will be better without me, so I guess it's quite inevitable.


    I apologize for my ramble. I'm not sure if the reply to this will be one made by a person, but if it is, thank you for reading what no one else has heard.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with your parents. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I live with my parents, grandma and two younger sisters. I absolutely hate it when my parents fight. Its almost always about money, about my dad spending all his paycheck on who knows what. He also take money away from my grandma, and rarely pays her back. He

    Leave a comment:

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