Calling CPS on my parents..?

[Unregistered]

So, just to get right to the point, my parents aren't the best. My mom gets verbally abusive to the point to where I want to hurt myself. My dad thinks that I'm faking being depressed and having anxiety even though I take medication for it and I was in a behavioral hospital for suicidal thoughts twice. My step mom is just a horrible person. She critizes my dad's parenting and also thinks that I'm faking being depressed and having anxiety. She gets mad at the stupidest things and throws a literal fit over it and gets violent and starts yelling. She says nasty things to me too. I almost slit my throat today because she said that if she was parenting my little sister and I , she would whoop us and stuff like that . She says that my sister and I basically runs the house. That's not true.
When I tried to go visit my mom, I got yelled at. I want to fix my mom's and I's relationship, but they thought I only wanted to go see my boyfriend. We were driving to Walmart with my siblings and my dad and step mom were yelling at me the whole time. It was frustrating. It proves they haven't been listening to me.
I talked to a lady on the suicide help line and she said I could possibly live with my friends or cousin because I am 16, and that a foster home is a last resort option for me.
But, I'm terrified. I can't talk about anything to my parents anymore without them getting mad. If I call CPS and they don't take the case, things will get even worse! I'm tired of bring treated wrong. I'm strongly considering suicide.

[ccsmod9]

RE: Calling CPS on my parents..?

Hello there,

Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

We’re really sorry to hear about how you’ve been feeling. We’re also sorry about all the verbal abuse happening too. Remember, abuse of any kind is NOT ok and is NEVER your fault. Thank you for deciding to share your story with us today, we’re really happy you did. It takes a lot of courage to reach out like you did today.

It sounds like things are really tough right now. It looks like you’ve already called a suicide hotline, but please, continue to do so ANY time you feel like life is getting to be too much. You’re worth saving. Your life is worth living. Don’t let these problems with your father and stepmom steal your future from you.

The lady on the hotline might be right. You could try and stay with a friend or relative, however we should warn you that sometimes the police could still return you home if your father filed a runaway report with the police. It’s hard to say what the police would do for someone who is close to being 18, but you could call your local police non-emergency number to ask them about their runaway policy. If you’re uncomfortable making that call on your own, you could try calling in here at 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929) and we’d be happy to make that call on your behalf.

You seem to be interested in reporting the abuse, but are worried about the outcome. There are a lot of fears and misconceptions that go along with abuse reporting, so we want to make sure you have the facts. If you take a look at www.childhelp.org, you might be able to learn more about abuse reporting and possible outcomes. If you wanted help filing a report (and you can do so without your parent’s being told it was you), you could try calling in here to us and we’d be able to help.

We really hope this information help you. Your safety is very important to us. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to us if you need any more help.


Best of luck,
NRS

[Guest]

I'm a 14 year old guy and I live with my grandparents who adopted and raised me with an almost perfect life. It's just this pat year has gone to hell and I'm reaching a breaking point. I have a problem with focus and responsibility, and an addiction to video games, though I guess that's normal hearing from friends and peers. The problem is my parents (mainly my mom) take that badly and respond abusively towards me. Just yesterday my dad and I were planning on going to airsoft but I ended up waisting time on my Xbox, which upset my dad and I apologized and took responsibility for. Though my mom decided to yell at me for it after it was discussed already, and that was unnecessary. Later on that evening we were about to eat dinner, and my parents worked very hard on it. I go to ask if I could eat dinner in my room and that's when everything went down. My mom and dad (both drunk) began to yell at me and call me names (spoiled brat, passive aggressive, video game addict, psychotic, immature child, etc.). As if this didn't bother me enough they took it a step further and demanded i give up my phone and and laptops for punishment. Then after me walking around a bit frustrated with this I gave them up. Then they started asking me for my old iPhone 4S (no service but I can text on wifi), which I had lost a while back and don't know where it is. I told them this and of course they accuse me of lying and start to interrogate me. Then they yell louder, team up on me, and start searching my room. This is when my mom stars pushing me, grabbing my arm, and hitting me. I get away from her and don't even try defend myself because I don't want to hurt anyone sine I'm larger than them. Then my mom begins to yell things like (you're such an embarrassment, go live with your birth dad who made you and abandoned you, leave our family, you're a lying little brat child, etc.) and this honestly made me tear up hearing these things. So my mom pushes me on my bed, an my dad throws an open water bottle at me, then grabs pepper spray and threatens me. This whole time they're interrogating me were my iPhone 4S is, which I still have no idea. This is when I try to get out if my room, and my mom pushes me back and hits me. "Get out of my face!" She says. I finally get passed her and run outside and sit on our grass for a while trying to calm down, come to find out my mom locked me out. I find our extra hidden key and let myself in. I tell her I wanna move out and live with my birth dad because I can't deal with this. She says that she'll send me to military school. I try to call family to break up this mess, but my mom grabs me and scratches my arm to take our landline phone away too. I tell her I ought to call the police, and she threatens to take away my phone and delete it forever. So I decide against it not risking that. I go to my room an lock my door, then she yells to unlock it. I say no, because I just want to be left alone and her to stay away. Her and my dad take my door off the hinges and I am left to sleep on my stripped bed (my jeers are wet from the bottle) with an open doorway. My mom checks on me (tries to be sneaky but makes noise and runs off). I am currently sending this through my secret iPod, so this is my last resort. My mom has attacked me for things like this for the past year, and has never owned up to it, blaming me or everything. Please help me.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You deserve to feel loved and respected at home, and know that the treatment that you are enduring is never ok.

Though we are not legal experts, we are here to help you explore your options moving forward. One option is to report the physical abuse. Resources like ours (1-800-RUNAWAY) and Child Help (National Child Abuse Hotline, 1-800-422-4453) can help you decide if that is a step you would feel safe taking. Know, however, that many resources, including ours, have mandated reporting policies: they are legally bound to report the abuse if given your name and location. You can always ask if the number you are reaching out to has a mandating reporting policy if you do not feel comfortable abuse reporting. Additionally, contacting the non-emergency police number with hypothetical and anonymous questions is another option to have to gauge the rights of someone in your situation.

Another option you have is to reach out to a trusted adult, though some adults, including school personnel, may also be mandated reporters. They could support you and help you figure out a plan to find an alternative living arrangement. We offer conference calls

Finally, you can always reach out to us at the National Runaway Safeline (1-800-RUNAWAY) as we are 24/7, toll-free, and confidential.
Good luck and stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Im a 14 year old from san antonio and I stay with my dad and stepmom. Im constantly watching my lil sisters. I watch them atleast 5 days out of the week. Im also constantly inside i go out about 1 day out of the week. I hate it and just wanna leave.

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for contacting us, it takes a lot of courage to reach out and share your story. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. It makes sense that you'd want the same independence and freedom that others your age have. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.

It sounds like there are some issues in communication between you, your dad, and your stepmom. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your dad and stepmom so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hey so I don't know if this is where i post my questions or my story. I need help. I hate living with my parents. I'm 15 with an 18 year old sister. For a period of time I cried almost everyday whether I got into an argument with a family member or i was just so frustrated. I was diagnosed with anxiety and a mood disorder with depression. I take zoloft and I used to go to therapy, but I hate therapy. Like I tried to talk but i guess im not a talker. I work for my dad and my sister is my manager. My mom works in the school district i go to school in. I don't trust my sister anymore because I snuck out once and I told her and she told my parents. I look down on myself cause my parents always make comments like are you sure you wn that, or that has a lot of sugar in it. I swim and im pretty much in shape. My parents have also hit me but always use the excuse "Its legal in texas". Also when i was little maybe 7-12 i would get angry and so frustrated that i would just explode. and how they delt with that was holding me down and sitting on me to the point i cant breathe. they also treat me very differently than my sister. I know different kid different situation but, she can go drink smoke weed and party, but if i do anything remotely bad they flip out. After I snuck out they took everything away from me for 3 months,even my school issued laptop. now i have a lot dont get me wrong and i still love my parents but i cant live like this anymore. theres a lot more to my whole story but i just dont know if i should call cps or something cause i dont know if i'm being abused or just overreacting. I'm conflicted cause they both have reputations, but my physical and mental health should matter right? I mean I used to self harm and want to commit suicide. I still think about self harming but i dont do it. Ive started smoking weed and vaping as a way to numb myself cause i dont know how to deal with this stuff.

[ccsmod10]

Thank you for telling us your story and reaching out. It can be difficult telling others what has happened to you. It can be difficult to manage situations like this and you don’t have to do it alone. What you described is abuse and you should not have to go through that. If you haven’t already, you could consider reporting the abuse you’ve been experiencing. If you want more information about abuse reporting or if you want to file a report, you could call Child Help at 1-800-422-4453.

We’re also sorry to hear that you’ve thought about suicide in the past. Your life is very important. If you begin having those thoughts again and want to talk with someone anonymously, please don’t hesitate to reach out for help. One resource that might work for you is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. You can reach them at 1-800-273-8255. They also have an internet chat function through their website at suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

If you’re not currently getting mental health resources, it can be really helpful to get treatment. As your mental health suffers, you have -limited ability to handle the other stressors in your life. Smoking may help but those are only temporary fixes. You can contact the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) to connect you to mental health resources at 1-800-950-6264 or NAMI.org You may also want to talk to your school because they should have a counselor for you.

We’re not legal experts here at NRS. Generally it’s not illegal to leave home, but your parents could file a runaway report, the police could get involved, and they could bring you home. The people you’re staying with could potentially get in trouble for having you stay there if your parents didn’t give you permission to do so. You could consider calling your local nonemergency police department to ask about their policies. We also have legal aid resources here if you have specific questions about the laws in your state.

Having support during difficult times can also be helpful. Reaching out to your sister could be one way to build support at home. One service we can offer is to conference call with your sister. This way you could have a conversation with your sister but you would not be alone. For example, it may be hard for you to explain to your sister how you feel you have been unfairly treated and how things are effecting you at home. Sometimes those conversations go better in a conference call because we can advocate for you. If you want to reach us, you can chat with us anytime at 1800runaway.org or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re here 24/7, and we are ready to listen and help however we can.

[Guest]

I have a mother with multiple sclerosis who is now permanently in a wheelchair. I love her so much but the demands of her care are starting to be too much for me to handle. My Dad is not at all helpful with housework to the point where every minute of my day i am working. If I want dinner, I have to make it myself. I have to do everything and find myself taking care of my parents much more than they take care of me. I can’t live my life like this anymore but don’t know what to do.

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are dealing with something very difficult at home with your parents. It sounds like your mom is very limited in what she can do at home, but you don’t deserve to be doing all the housework and cooking at home. Feeling like you can’t do this anymore is normal and completely understandable. You are also the best judge on what you need as a living situation.

We wanted to share a couple of options with you. First, you can consider talking this situation through with an adult -- ideally someone who not only knows you but also perhaps your family. A school guidance counselor could be a good person for this. Support is important in difficult situations -- you must feel like everything is on your shoulders.

The other thing you can do is formally report what’s happening at home by filing an abuse report. Basically, what you are describing sounds like neglect. You can do this by calling the National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-422-4453). This can be a big step, so if you want to just talk through how the abuse reporting process works and what may happen when you make this report, we suggest you do not provide your name to the hotline until you are sure you want to file an abuse report.

Thank you again for reaching out to us and we hope this has been helpful. If you’d like to discuss this anymore, please don’t hesitate to call us at the National Runaway Safeline. You can reach us at 1-800-786-2929. We are here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

My mother yells at me EVER SINGLE DAY it's over the smallest things aswell. My God mom said I could live with her if anything is wrong but my mom took my phone so I i have no cell service because im typing this on my iPhone 4S that she thinks is sold to apple. She threatened to not feed me and she told me this morning that I had to stay in my room so since I had to stay in there, I couldn't eat. I sat in there hungry for about 2-3 hours. I just don't know what to do.

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. It seems like your mom isn’t fully understanding how her daily yelling and threats of not feeding you is making you feel. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your mom so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

My grandma threw a computer at me because I forgot to take the dogs out at midnight

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out to NRS. From what yo shared, it sounds like things have been escalating physically at home. It is not okay that your grandma threw something at you. You deserve to be treated in a way that makes you feel safe.

If you feel like what is happening at home is abuse, the national child abuse hotline may be helpful in providing support and options for you. You can contact them at 800-422-4453 or go to www.childhelphotline.org if you would like to talk more about what has been happening at home.

We want to be a support for you while you go through this challenging time. We can best help you by phone or chat, so that we can talk more in detail about your situation and help you discover your options. We are here 24/7 to help.

Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

I am a 16 year old girl. My parents are divorced. I live with them equally. I want to run from my dads house and stay with my mom permanently. My dad will turn my phone service off for weeks at a time. He has so many rules that I have to follow and he will scream at me for the littlest things. For example today I had a mandatory play practice for my high school, I had an SAT prep class and he wanted me to go to the victory parade for the Washington Nationals. The play practice was mandatory and he expected me to leave early and go to the parade. He got mad at me because I didn’t go to the parade with him. Whenever I do something that takes time away from him he gets mad at me. I have tech week this week and he doesn’t like it because I’m staying with my mom all week. He always wants the schedule equal but I try and make it more for my mom and less for him because he gets mad at the littlest things. A few weeks ago he made me ride his motorcycle without a helmet.

[ccsmod15]

Hello! Thank you so much for reaching out, we appreciate you seeking help.

It sounds like you’re going through a lot right now with your dad, and you find yourself spending most of your time wanting to go to your mom’s house. It’s really great that you have a big support system there to help you, and we want you to know we are here as well to assist in any way that we can. You may want to consider talking to your mom about not wanting to be with your dad anymore, and see if you all can sit down and talk further about this situation. We’re so glad that you tech week motivating you to push forward in school, and are looking forward to it!

Unfortunately we aren’t legal experts, but if you decide to run away without your guardian’s approval, your guardian can contact the authorities, and file a runaway report. Whoever you end up staying with, may face some consequences. This may be tricky since both your guardians have parental rights. An option to maybe explore would be to contact your local non-emergency phone number, and let them know what the consequences of running away are.

Again, thank you so much for reaching out. We know you’re in a very hard situation, and we’re so proud that you are wanting to seek help. Please feel to reach out to us anytime on chat, or by phone at 1800) 786-2929, and we can call out anywhere on your behalf as well. Best of luck!

[Guest]

I deal with issues because of my weight I’m 16 I was put on diet pills at 13 I deal with anxiety and depression I had a in hospice stay. My dad is always Im overweight I’m constantly being yelled and screamed at I can make one slight mistake and to him it’s the end of the world. My dad believes depression is stupid and that I should be able turn my feelings off like the switch of a light. I have many panic attacks I feel like nobody gets me my own grandma kicked me out of her house. I deal with verbal and emotional abuse. I don’t know if I can deal with it anymore. I fight myself not to start cutting again or swallowing pills. What should I do. Please help.

[ccsmod3]

Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are struggling with a lot at home. It’s unfortunate that your dad doesn’t acknowledge your mental health issues. Depression or Anxiety isn’t something you can just get over. It takes time to learn coping mechanisms to combat depression or anxiety. If you ever want to talk to someone about what you are experiencing, call NAMI at 1800-950-NAMI. Sometimes it helps to talk to a guidance counselor, friend or family member who you trust about what is going on and explore options or just vent.
It must be incredibly lonely to feel like no one understands you. If you ever want to speak with a professional about your mental health issues or about your family contact SAMHSA at 1800-662-HELP and they could help you locate a therapist in your area. You stated that you also deal with emotional and verbal abuse as well. If you want to talk to someone about reporting the abuse happening in your home you can contact Child Help at 1800-422-4453. It’s not having any support at home and you don’t deserve the way that you have been treated. You deserve to be in an environment you were you feel safe and loved. You can’t really control how your family is but you can control how you respond. It seems like you want to continue responding in a healthy way and you are aware of some of the ways you have been coping that are not as safe. If you ever get the urge to cut or harm yourself in anyway please contact To Write Love on Her Arms at www.twloha.com or Suicide Prevention Line at 1800-273-8255. Remember we are here 24/7 if you want to talk or explore your options. You can call us at 1800-RUNAWAY. Thanks for being brave and honest about your experiences. Best of luck!

[Guest]

I'm a 12 year-old girl and my parents aren't the best in the world. Both my Mom and Dad are verbally abusive towards me and my siblings. Just today my 6-year-old brother was crying because his IPad case broke and my Dad exploded on him, calling him hurtful names (useless, idiot, mistake, etc.) And of all this, my mom is yelling across the house "SHUT THE F*** UP!" Which obviously only made matters worse.

My Dad is also really late to everything. I'll ask him kindly to pick us up from a 4-hour play practice, and my sister and I would be the last ones to be picked up, and when he picks us up, he yells at US because we "Didn't tell him sooner" or whatever. Not to mention both my parents drink a whole bottle of wine an hour, right in front of us the kids.

I'm even starting to have suicidal thoughts because of how strict and manipulative they are. They force me to Cook, clean, do laundry, and take care of my little siblings, all while I'm still a growing child who needs attention, which is something I don't have in this world.

What should I do? Though they're verbally abusive, they're still pretty good parents by paying for all my needs and expenses. Send Help Please

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to NRS. Thanks for contacting NRS and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you with figuring out your next steps in this difficult situation. Asking for help was really responsible and smart of you. We are sorry to hear things are so unstable and stressful at home. It is your parents's responsibility to take care of you and your your siblings, and it is unfair they are making you take on so much responsibility. You deserve to feel safe and supported where you live.

You know your situation better than anyone and what options might be worth it for you to consider. The national child abuse hotline, Child Help, sounds like it could be a helpful resource for you during this challenging time. Their website has a lot of information on it about different types of abuse and how to get help. You can contact them 24/7 at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org/hotline/ to talk more about your experience at home. They might be able to help you come up with a safety plan to better cope with the stress and to get support from a trusted adult who may be able to intervene.

We are available 24/7 to be a listening ear and support you you in your next steps. If you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation at home, you can reach out anytime by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat at 1800runaway.org.

-NRS

[Guest]

im a seventeen year old girl from louisiana and i have two younger sisters. my older sister (she is moved out and in a different state) supports my desire to get mine and my younger sisters out of this house. i think a fine option would be to live with my cousins (they live in florida). my parents are verbally abusive and the house alone is unsafe to live in. my father leaves his hand-gun on the couch, under the couch cushion, on the passenger seat in his car (which is where i sit when he drives me to school). my mother is an alcoholic. they aren’t physically abusive, but as a child i was physically abused a few times by my mother when she was drunk. my mother was even considering taking my younger sister out of therapy because she was worried her therapist would contact authorities and my younger sister would be removed from our home. my father doesn’t take mental health seriously, which is dangerous because my younger sister is very suicidal. and it is even more unsafe because my father leaves his hand-gun around. he says it doesn’t matter because we don’t know how to load the gun. anyways, my sisters are 14 and 9, and my childhood was ruined by my father and mother screaming at me, my mother being drunk all the time, my father lying all the time to my mother, and me having to raise my little sisters as best i can because my parents are not proper parents. i need to get us out of here, i am losing my mind. because of the awful childhoods we have had, my older sister developed a very serious eating disorder (my father would make comments about her being overweight, and when she was quite young, he pressured her to work out and get skinny), anxiety, and depression. i don’t have depression, but for five years now i have been addicted to burning myself and cutting myself. and i have attempted suicide once because i was so terrified of what my father was going to do to me when he found out i had secretly been talking to my friends online. you heard right. they isolate me. and when they found out i was bisexual (they’re christian), they made me visit a christian therapist every friday for two hours, to “help” me with my “homosexual temptations”. my younger sister has depression, anxiety, an eating disorder, and she cuts herself. i am very worried about my youngest sister. i don’t want her to turn out like me and my other sisters, just because my parents take away our childhoods. how do i get us out of here? i don’t have a car, a job, or any money. the phone i’m using, i had to secretly buy. it is the only way to prevent myself from going insane from them forcing me to be isolated from the world. i need to get me and my little sisters out of here. what do i do?

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline and sharing your story with us, it takes great courage to reach out and we appreciate you taking the step to reach out for us.
It seems like you and your sisters have gone through so much over the years and you seem super mature for your age especially having to go through all of that. It does seem like you all have been in an unsafe situation that seems emotionally and mentally exhausting.
You mentioned wanting to leave and take your sisters with you, we are not legal experts but we do have some information. Because you all are minors if you were to leave without permission your legal guardian can file a runaway report. If the police were to find you guys they most likely would bring you guys back home. One option to consider is to file an abuse report and in the report you could mention that you have tried to attempt suicide and your sister is also suicidal, and talk about how there is a hand gun in the house. Usually CPS would take this matter seriously and do an investigation. You can file an abuse report by calling Child Help at: 1800-422-4453. You can also consider talking with your school counselor about what has been going on and they may be able to figure out a plan and provide resources for you.
We know you have mentioned suicide and we want you to know that you and your sister’s lives are very important and you all are valuable. Suicide is a permeant decision to a temporary situation. If you are your sisters are ever feeling suicidal please call The National Suicide Prevention Line at: 1800-273-8255. There is always someone willing to listen and willing to provide support. You are not alone in this.
You also mentioned that your mother is an alcoholic and that your mental health has suffered. That can be really difficult to live with and can be super frustrating. One resource that you may find to be helpful is called SAMHSA (substance abuse and mental health services administration). They can be reached at 1877-726-4727. Another great resource is NAMI (national alliance on mental illnesses) they can be reached at 1800-950-NAMI.
We hope that this information may be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to talk more about your situation please give us a call (1800-786-2929). We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support. Stay strong, you are not alone in this! Best of luck!
NRS

[Guest]

I'm a 15 year old girl living in southern Ohio. For the most part, I've grown up with a d.ecent life, and one I was tricked into thinking was a normal life, a good life. Over the past few years, things have gotten worse, to say the least.
My dad seems to order me and mom around constantly. He'll have us do 50 million different things for him, things like making him a sandwich done in this specific way, searching around for pills or whatever. Now, I suppose this wouldn't be a problem if it wasn't constant. I feel like a servant in my own home. Basically, we're obligated to do everything dad should do for himself, except go to the bathroom, or a very occasional time he needs to look like he hasn't been laying in his own pathetic filth indefinitely. He constantly says this is because he doesn't feel good. He's been "not feeling good" for upwards of a year. I try to say it would help him if he tried to exercise, and if his diet wasn't 80% sugar and sweets. I tell him maybe he should get his act together, get back on his diet, cause this is only making things worse. He never listens, and me trying to help is only seen as backtalk. Additionally, me and mom get yelled at if we don't make sure he has chocolate on hand to eat whenever he wants it. Honestly, its a miracle we can support ourselves. We've been living off of tax returns my parents forgot they had to file for the past month I think, because dad just doesn't wanna work anymore. Or do anything.

My mom has been subject to the same treatment, possibly longer than I have. Due to this, she always seems stressed. She's turning into an alcoholic, and what I think is depression is keeping her unmotivated to do anything either. I'm the one who cleans up everything. The only thing I don't do at home is make our dinners, that's the only thing she'll do. I love my mom, she's the only parent I feel I can actually talk to, but I just can't do everything. I can't keep the house clean, all the while I have schoolwork and all this other stuff my dad wants me to do. Because of this, the house is a mess. My room is the cleanest one in the house, which is saying something. I guess I live in a pigpen. Dad doesn't see that I can't be a perfect little robot and do everything, so he often complains about this too.

He complains about everything. He gets me sick and worried about everything to the point where I never really know if the end times are looming over my head or not. It feels like it. These two argue all the time, or complain about each other to me with me being stuck as the middle man. Mom complains about the reasons stated above, and additionally that he always micromanages her. Dad complains because he expects everything should be done as his command. This is driving me insane. Being stuck in this house only makes me feel worse, its disarray a cruel reminder that I can't fix everything, as well as these two arguing. I hate it, I hate it so much.

I've vented to my boyfriend a lot about this. (Keep in mind it's very long distant, we can't really help each other in person) We've run over options. I'm considering waiting this out until I can drive (if I don't fail any tests then about 6 months) then run away. I'd try to see if I could stay at a friend's house, but I don't really have many friends irl. I've been homeschooled since I was 8, and the only place I can really be with other kids is once a week at the local church youth group. I only have one friend there, and I doubt he and his family could take me in. My boyfriend thinks we should call CPS, but we're both scared of the consequences. I think I agree with him. I don't know what to do anymore.

[ccsmod15]

Thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It sounds like you are living in a very difficult and very stressful situation. Not only do you have to deal with the control and complaints from your father, there are the constant arguments between your parents – that lands you in the middle of their relationship. Also, being homeschooled, you’re stuck being at home without the benefit and escape from the house on a daily basis. This is not right and not OK. You deserve to grow up in a safe and supportive home where you are not expected to do all the work and to feel so on edge all the time.
It is understandable that the condition of the house reflects the general unhappiness and depression present in your home. We are glad that your boyfriend is supportive and hears you. We are also glad that you have at least one friend at your youth group.
As far as reporting to CPS, that is always an option that you do have and you can reach out to Child Help at 1-800422-4453 to talk things over with them about what might happen, your situation might fall under the category of neglect. It is understandable that you encourage you dad to make some changes to help his health, and in turn, help you, but it is nearly impossible to reason with someone to make a change. In the end, the only person we can influence is ourselves.
Given that, we would really hope that you might reach out to us through either our phone hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or by chatting with us through www.1800runaway.org We would like to talk this over with you; we are here to listen and help.
We hope to hear from you soon
Sincerely, NRS

[Guest]

Dad pushed and threatened me

So I’m a 15 year old boy, and my dad who is 68(yes I know thats old as hell for me to be his son), has threatened me in the past. But tonight when he was talking lots of ******** about my 30 year old sister( from mom’s other marriage), I told him he doesnt even care about his wife when he said he doesnt care about my sister, because years ago he broke my mom’s arm when she was drunk. He stormed up to my room and started pushing me against the wall, calling me “dip********” and the usuals. He finally stopped and then I said “get the ******** away from me.” He came back in the room and pushed and threatened me. Now I’m like 2 inches taller than him and probably could have bested him in a fight, but he has access to weapons and I don’t feel like testing that, or be registered as a delinquent. What should I do?( my mom supported me after this). I’m scared ********less that he could seriously hurt me if I even spoke to him.

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thank you so much for taking the time to write us. It takes a lot of courage to speak up and share difficult situations like this. It sounds like your dad has been making home intimidating and dangerous for you. His actions are not okay and he should not be threatening you or harming you in any way. Choosing to de-escalate the situation considering your dad has access to weapons sounds like it was a really smart and mature response on your part. This is a scary spot to be in, but you have been doing your best to get through it.

You do have the option to report your dad for child abuse. This would get a social worker involved to make sure that home is safe for you and your mom. There is a resource called Child Help which is the national child abuse hotline and it is available to help young people who are in dangerous or abusive situations at home. They can provide support with making the report as well as talk with you about how to get people involved to intervene. You can contact them by calling 1-800-422-4453 or go to www.childhelphotline.org.

If you ever feel like you or someone else in the household is in physical danger or if your dad threatens you with a weapon, you can call 911 for emergency services.

You have been so strong in dealing with this difficult situation, and you do not have to go through it alone. We want to talk more in detail about what you would like to do so that we can better support you. You can contact us 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at 1800runaway.org.

We look forward to hearing from you soon,
NRS