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Hello... this is a lot of information so I will try to be as quick and concise as possible. To begin, I am seriously considering running away from home.
The situation is complicated. I'm 18 - so I'm a legal adult. All my life I have been neglected by my single mother. She has never done it intentionally,
it is just that she works full time so she has no time or capacity for me. She was in an abusive marriage for 20 years and her job causes her high levels
of stress, so she simply cannot deal with anything else - including me. She has a lot of emotional and other problems, but she does love me and she never tries
to hurt me.
I have been depressed, alone, and underweight my entire life. My health has just declined and declined as the years have gone by. I was a child so I could not
help myself, and any time I tried to ask for help I was responded to with negativity or no results. It is normal for me to go without food, or eating very
little for weeks at a time. Each week between Thursday-Sunday it is not common for me to eat at all because we will be out of food. When we go to the store
to buy more, we can never afford much food because my mother doesn't make much money. I am so unhealthy that I am not in the condition to work. I recently
worked 2 jobs but it did not make any difference in my financial situation. If anything it accelerated the rate of my decaying health.
I think that honestly, I need to be hospitalized. I know that I have serious health problems, but I also know that we can't afford it. We can't even afford
visits to the primary doctor. My mother and I both need therapy, and we need financial help. But we are a part of an invisible demographic.
Statistically, our yearly income totals to just over enough to qualify for any help. In the eyes of the government we are well enough off. But in reality,
all of that money disappears to bills and taxes and we are left with none. Our monthly budget for food and groceries is about ~$100. I can't remember a time
in my life when we weren't just barely surviving. I thought for so long that that was just how we lived, and that there was no way out. Nothing has ever
changed even when I've tried to talk to my mother about it, or there are big break downs and things like that. I don't know if there is any kind of help
that we are entitled to out there, but I do know that my life will go on like this indefinitely until something drastic happens that forces change.
We cannot help ourselves alone.
So my question is, what is there for me, or for us? What can we do? If I ran away, where could I go? Would it be better or worse for me, and could I
even get the help that I need? My primary concerns are for my physical health and mental health/emotional stability.
The situation is complicated. I'm 18 - so I'm a legal adult. All my life I have been neglected by my single mother. She has never done it intentionally,
it is just that she works full time so she has no time or capacity for me. She was in an abusive marriage for 20 years and her job causes her high levels
of stress, so she simply cannot deal with anything else - including me. She has a lot of emotional and other problems, but she does love me and she never tries
to hurt me.
I have been depressed, alone, and underweight my entire life. My health has just declined and declined as the years have gone by. I was a child so I could not
help myself, and any time I tried to ask for help I was responded to with negativity or no results. It is normal for me to go without food, or eating very
little for weeks at a time. Each week between Thursday-Sunday it is not common for me to eat at all because we will be out of food. When we go to the store
to buy more, we can never afford much food because my mother doesn't make much money. I am so unhealthy that I am not in the condition to work. I recently
worked 2 jobs but it did not make any difference in my financial situation. If anything it accelerated the rate of my decaying health.
I think that honestly, I need to be hospitalized. I know that I have serious health problems, but I also know that we can't afford it. We can't even afford
visits to the primary doctor. My mother and I both need therapy, and we need financial help. But we are a part of an invisible demographic.
Statistically, our yearly income totals to just over enough to qualify for any help. In the eyes of the government we are well enough off. But in reality,
all of that money disappears to bills and taxes and we are left with none. Our monthly budget for food and groceries is about ~$100. I can't remember a time
in my life when we weren't just barely surviving. I thought for so long that that was just how we lived, and that there was no way out. Nothing has ever
changed even when I've tried to talk to my mother about it, or there are big break downs and things like that. I don't know if there is any kind of help
that we are entitled to out there, but I do know that my life will go on like this indefinitely until something drastic happens that forces change.
We cannot help ourselves alone.
So my question is, what is there for me, or for us? What can we do? If I ran away, where could I go? Would it be better or worse for me, and could I
even get the help that I need? My primary concerns are for my physical health and mental health/emotional stability.
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