15 and wanting to runaway

[Unregistered]

I want to runaway because I don't want to live with my mom anymore because she makes me really depressed and I take care of her and me (well I don't do the cooking because my grandma does that when she comes over) I've been taking care of both me and my mom for about 6 years because she won't do anything all she does is lay in bed and watch TV or do stuff on her computer. She does call me names a lot and has said before that she'd rather have me be dead. I used to have a good relationship with my mom but it seems as I got older she stopped doing things around the house and stopped caring about me she doesn't really pay much attention to me. I was recently raped by a guy I met online and it has made me really depressed and when I try talking to my mom about it she tells me to stop bringing it up. I just can't take living with her anymore and I don't have anywhere to go. My family just doesn't seem to like me at all they always make fun of me and never really talk to me. The only person in my life who seems to care about me is a friend of mine that I met online a couple weeks ago and I would go live with him but he lives in a different state and he's 18 and I wouldn't want to get him into trouble. I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't like talking to people 1. because I feel like such a burden to them and 2. I have a mental problem called Aspergers or Autism Spectrum Disorder that makes it extremely hard for me to talk to people and be social. I just really need help.

[ccsmod10]

RE: 15 and wanting to runaway

Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It is a courageous first step that you have taken to getting the help that you may need. You are a strong person for having gone through so much already. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation having to care for you and your mom for so long. That must be a very heavy responsibility to have. It is unfair that your mom says such things to you. It must feel very unwelcoming to not be accepted by your family. We want you to know you are a worthy person who does not deserve that type of treatment. Things seem to be very overwhelming at home and you do not know what to do.

You mentioned you considered running away. There are somethings to consider before you do so. This is not meant to put you down, but instead to create a safety plan. If you leave where will you go and how long do you plan on being gone? What will your mother say? Will you continue school? How will you survive (money, clothes, shelter, food etc)? How much do you trust the man who lives in another state? How will you travel here? What is you plan b? Sometimes thinking of these things help prepare for the future. If you need help to navigate creating this plan you can chat with us found on our website or call us at 1800-RUNAWAY if you are comfortable with that.
You mentioned that you were sexually abused by someone you met online. We are terribly sorry for having to go through such a painful situation. Even if your mom is not providing you with the support you may need to get through this, there are people out there that are. Have you told anyone else about this? Possibly your grandma, a trusted teacher, or school counselor? Would it be possible to make a police report? RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) is a good resources that could be of some assistance with finding how to cope within a healthy manner.

Living with Asperger’s or Autism Spectrum Disorder seems like it would cause a lot of obstacles for you. You mentioned that it makes it extremely hard for you to talk to people. Would you happen to already have a therapist or counselor that you could talk to? If not, you could possibly find one by calling SAMHSA (Substance Abuse & Mental Health Administration) at 1877-726-4727.

We hope this information was helpful to you. We want you to know you are not alone. We are here to listen and help as best as we can. Hope to hear from you soon.
Stay Safe,
NRS

[Unregistered]

Re: 15 and wanting to runaway

I'd just like to runaway and never come back and never talk to my family again. Seems like that's how they would like things anyways. I'm currently doing online school and would like to continue doing that even if I did runaway I'd just have to find a way to get enrolled into an online school wherever I decide to go if I do runway. If I do runaway I'll probably just find someone who wouldn't mind helping me with stuff until I'm 18 and can officially get a good job and live on my own. And I trust my guy friend more than I've ever trusted anyone I tell him everything. I've even told him things I've never told anyone else. I would love to runway to the state he lives in but it's pretty far from where I live (I live in Utah and he lives in Georgia) I would probably have to find someone to take me there or just find another way there. I guess my plan b would be to try and get emancipated when I turn 16 if I'm still not wanting to live with my mom or not wanting to be around my family anymore but I'm not sure if my mom would let me be emancipated. But that's all I really can do to get away and try and be happier in life. And about the whole rape thing we did file a police report the day it happened and not much has been done about that. I do have a therapist I talk to but she doesn't really help me much she just seems like she doesn't care about anything I say and it also seems like she kind of thinks I'm lying about things when I'm not. I have talked to my friend about me wanting to runaway and he just told me to stay with my mom and things will get better but I've been dealing with this for years and it's just gotten worse and worse I just want to give up and runaway. It just seems like nobody understands me or the things I'm going through. Everyone I've talked to just tell me to either get over it or just wait until things get better but I don't think things will get better unless I just runaway or get emancipated when I'm 16.

[ccsmod6]

Re: 15 and wanting to runaway

Hi there again,

Thanks for your response. It seems that you have thought about some possible options already and have thought of ways to stay safe if you left without permission as well as how you may legally leave home through emancipation. You shared some ways that you tried to get help, and we're sorry that you feel nothing has changed nor helped. It sounds like the most important thing for you right now is trust- and you feel that nobody understands you are believes how difficult it has been for you to go through everything. We're here as a support to you; ready to listen. Sometimes talking things out loud with someone may bring up an option or solution all on its own. If we can offer any support or resources, please know that we are available 24/7 by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). You may also chat with us by clicking the chat icon on our website.

We look forward to your call or chat soon.

Take care,

NRS