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i want to run away but don’t want to hurt my mom?

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  • i want to run away but don’t want to hurt my mom?

    I’ve been wanting to leave since I was 12 (in 16 now), but been suffering in this family all my life. I want to leave so badly. My family never let me grow into the responsible teenager I dreamed of becoming. I just have severe mental illness and trauma. I’ve been through so much therapy but it didn’t work be after each therapy session or whatever I have to go back to the family that makes everything worse. I would give anything to experience an average childhood, without the violent fights, the yelling, the name-calling, the drinking, etc. it’s not happening to that extent now but they still fight all day and name call. I can’t explain all of it here but it just feels so toxic and dysfunctional to come home to every day. I want to leave so badly. I want to give my head and my heart a break. But I know my mom would start crying and she doesn’t cry often. I know she loves me and I love her but I can’t live with her and my dad (whom I haven’t talked to for 3 years, but still lives with us). I want to go so badly. Social workers can’t do much although they agreed it’s not good for me to live there. Sorry this is a bit much and my situation is definitely not that bad so I know I probably don’t need help or to leave my house but it just feels horrible, every single day. I’m so tired I don’t know what to do. I feel so trapped and I have no one to talk to about it, not even a friend. And my therapist is not seeing me anymore either. I’m so done. Honestly I might just leave tomorrow. We’ll see. Sorry bye.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 04-02-2019, 06:08 AM.

  • #2
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for contacting us, it takes a lot of courage to reach out and share your story. It must be really hard to live in a home that is so traumatic and causes you so much mental anguish. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.

    You mentioned some things like drinking and violent fighting that raises concern for your safety and well-being. Absolutely no one deserves to be abused or neglected. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It may also be a good idea to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    All the best,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Reply: Ive been wanting to leave

      Hello,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

      We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
      It sounds like that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
      We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
      Having your family react the way they do must be upsetting and frustrating.

      Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.
      NRS is here to listen and here to help.
      We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
      If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

      You are welcome to discuss your situation and talk about possible options for help.
      What you did today by reaching out was great. Good job.
      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Take care,
      NRS

      We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment

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