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My mom says yes my dad says no

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  • My mom says yes my dad says no

    So I'm 17 I'm working one job 30+ hours a week, i have money saved and am still saving. I've maintained up to 3 jobs at once and never had my mother involved. I currently live in Florida. My dad lives in Cali, he says I can't move back and be on my own, my mom says I can if "that's what I want". I have a place lined up with some friends In a safe environment, I'm about to sit for my official GED. Can my dad file a run-away report if my mom agreed? I don't have time to be emancipated either way I'm moving in 18 days... Just want to know if legal action can be taken against me. Oh and my dad sent me to live with my mom when I was 16. Did he give up his rights as a parent?

  • #2
    Re: My mom says yes my dad says no


    Thank you so much for reaching out to us. It sounds like you’ve been working really hard to make sure you’re able to support yourself and you’ve made arrangements to stay somewhere safe. We’re sorry to hear that your parents are disagreeing, it can be confusing to figure out what to do and what might happen when parents haven’t agreed on a youth's ability to live independently. You’ve asked about your dad’s ability to file a runaway report and whether he gave up his rights as a parent when he sent you to live with your mom. We’re not legal experts, but we will do our best to provide you as much information as we can.

    From what we know to be true, whomever is your parent or legal guardian has the right to file a runaway report if you are still considered a minor. We can’t say with certainty whether that changes because you are now living with your mom vs living with your dad. It sounds like it is unclear whether or not he still has custody of you at all. Perhaps it would be helpful to confirm with your mom, since she is who you were most recently living with. If she is unable to confirm who has custody, your next option might be to reach out to someone familiar with family law in your state. They would have a better idea of whether or not your dad can file a report. If you don’t know what legal resources might be available to you, feel free to give us a call, we would be happy to help you identify an organization that might be able to answer your questions.

    We understand that this situation can be really confusing, especially since not only have your parents disagreed about whether or not you can live on your own, but they’ve not made it clear who currently has custody of you. If you’d to find out about local resources that might be able to answer your questions, you can reach us by phone 24/7 at 1.800.RUNAWAY (786.2929). We are also available via chat every day from 4:30pm – 11:30pm CST. Best of luck to you.

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)


    • #3
      I have a similar question. I’m 16 years old, my mom has full custody of me and my dad is paying her child support he’s been paying child support for years. The last time I lived with him was when I was a baby before him and my mom broke up. Not saying I haven’t seen him in that long cause I have, i do go and spend the night at his house sometimes but I don’t live with him. My question is .. I’ve been in a relationship for 3 years with the same person my family loves him his family loves me they recently moved to Pennsylvania for reasons and offered me to come with my mom is fine with it she said yes but my dad is saying no . If I go will I run into any problems? Can he file me as a runaway ?


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. We are not legal experts so we cannot say for sure what will happen. You may want to seek legal aid in order to determine whether or not you need your father's consent. Since your mother has full custody, you may not need your father's consent. If you have any other questions or concerns please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), or email. We wish you the best.
        Last edited by ccsmod2; 12-30-2017, 12:48 AM.

    • #4
      i am 16 years old and my parents have 50/50 custody of me and i this weekend is my dads weekend but i was invited to go to wenatchee washington for the weekend which is like two hours from my house and my dad said yes but my mom said no. and the kicker is that i would leave on thursday which is technically my moms day and she still said no. if i go can my mom file a run away child report or can my dad be introuble for it?


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
        While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
        We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); (click on the chat button).
        If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
        Be safe,

    • #5
      Hi, I'm 16 and currently living with my mom and my dad really hasn't been in the picture for basically all my life. Yes, life comes with challenges that are not easy at all but I'm getting to my wit's end with my mom. And yes I have done things for her to treat me differently in certain manners. But my question is that I want to get a job but my mom is saying "No" would it still be possible for me to get a job if my dad says "Yes' I can get a job. while living with my mom!!!


      • ccsmod16
        ccsmod16 commented
        Editing a comment
        thanks for reaching out; we are glad that you did. It sounds like things are hard at home between you and your mom. We are glad that it sounds like things are better with your dad.
        As far as your question, we just don't have a way to know the answer. We don't know if your mom would call your boss; we don't know if in your state you can legally work with or without parental consent. It might be possible for your dad can work with your mom to see if he can get her to agree to you having a job.
        We work best when we can have a conversation with people, so we hope you will reach out to our live services to talk this over more and hear more of the situation to see if there is a way to work this out.
        We truly hope to hear from you soon.
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