My mom is abusive.

[Unregistered]

I m fifteen years old, a female. I have two brothers. On to the thing I need help with -- my mom is emotionally and physically abusive. She punched my brother in the face today, and took his phone to keep him from contacting anybody. He bled a lot and there s a bruise. She punched him because he stated his opinion on a restaurant. It s constantly, "you are a mistake. I wish I would have aborted you when I had the chance", "you ll never be loved", "I hate you", "you aren't the kid i wanted", and she s even told me to kill myself and then tried to take it back when I attempted suicide.*

She threatens that if one of us goes to CPS, she will make our lives worse. I m afraid if I go and ask for help, we ll still be in the house when they come and she will make everything worse. Another of the problems is that I wouldn t have a phone and I would probably have to switch schools if i left. I don t want to lose what I have left. If I try to reason wiyh her on how she makes me feel, it s always "oh, wah, go cut". My mom does not take us to the doctor when we need it, she keeps us from family and friends, tries to make it like she s always right. She belittles us and blames problems on me, and she always tells me about how I"m a failure and a ******** up. I have told my boyfriend and I have told my grandma some of what s been going on.

[ccsmod16]

Re: My mom is abusive.

Hi there, and thank you for reaching out to us tonight. It takes courage to do that, and we’re glad you did – that’s why we’re here, to listen and to help. It sounds like you and your brothers are in really tough situation with your mom.

The incidents that you have described, both the physical harm and emotional abuse–no one deserves to be treated like that. Everyone deserves to feel safe and protected, especially at home. No one deserves to be physically harmed – that should not be happening to you.

We’re very concerned about your safety – did your brother seek treatment for his injuries? We’re glad to hear that you have been able to confide some in your grandma and your boyfriend – it’s important to have support and we’re glad that you’re seeking help and guidance.

Has anyone noticed what’s been going on at your home, perhaps a medical professional, or school nurse? Or have you considered talking to someone in law enforcement or at the school – perhaps a trusted adult or teacher? It sounds like you’re concerned about what could happen if one of you reported to CPS. We understand that this can be a difficult and scary process. But if that’s something which you’d like to know more about, to explore in greater detail before you decide if that’s something you want to pursue, please know that we would be happy to talk you through the process, answer any questions you have and, if you decide you want to file report, can help you go through that process.

You might also want to consider contacting Child Help USA online at www.childhelp.org or, if you can get to a phone, at 1.800.422.4453. Like us, they have a 24-hour hotline, but also are trained to help you explore your options for reporting and get the support you need, and will even help you facilitate that if decide that’s what you want to do.

It’s understandable that you’d be concerned about your safety after what you’ve described – and that’s something that we can discuss with you, to help you and your brothers explore ways to ensure your safety, because that is important to us. In terms of your school – it sounds like that is important to you and you’re worried about having to switch. We can definitely talk through that with you – there may be several options where you’d be able to stay in the same school district, and still be safe.

Regarding your prior suicide attempt, do you still have those feelings? If so, have you considered or have you heard of National Suicide Hotline? The people staffing the site at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org and the hotline, which is 1-800-273-TALK, have special training in this area and may be a valuable resource to you if you’re still having those feelings.

From what you’ve described, you sound like a very strong person, and we want to provide you the support you need and deserve. If you’d like to talk in more depth about your options, please know that we are here 24 hours 7 days a week online or by phone at 1.800.RUNAWAY, and are ready to help. Best of luck and we hope to hear back from you soon.