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My parents are getting "too" involved and it's making me sna

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  • My parents are getting "too" involved and it's making me sna

    My parents are just starting to get too into my school life. My father keeps in contact with my teachers if i start to do bad, and i don't need him getting so involved. I try to remain calm when talking to him, but he just brings up the bad grades, and it makes me go over the edge. I get angrier and end up yelling because he uses that as his instant "make me feel bad, he has control" thing. I'm 15 and the thought of running away just seem better and better. I know he's just trying to help, but there is such a thing as too much help. I want him to just leave it alone because i always get my grades back up. He's just getting to involved, and if I try to tell him to stop he just goes back to the failing line. There's no reasoning with him, and i don't know how to resolve the problem. I want to run away for a few days or weeks just to show him what all his over involvement is doing. I just can't think of any other way to get him to listen. If I run away and come back maybe he'll give me a chance to talk. I just need some help.

  • #2
    Re: My parents are getting "too" involved and it's making me sna

    Thank you for posting a bulletin. It sounds like you feel your father has been too involved with your grades and it has been frustrating for you. We are sorry that it has made you feel bad to the point of wanting to runaway. We are glad that you contacted us though! It sounds like you have tried to remain calm to talk to him, but it has upset you when he brings up the bad grades. When your father contacts your teachers do you know what is said? You had mention that your parents are getting to involved with your school life, but mainly talk about your father. Is your mother has involved like your father? Have you talked to anyone else about this (mother, teachers, school counselor, friend or siblings)? Do you feel it would help? It sounds like your father is concerned about your grades; do you feel he has a reason to be? Are there other ways to communication with your father that might work?

    It sounds like you feel that running away might change things where he would listen to you. Have you run away before? If so, how were things when you returned? Do you think your parents would file a runaway report? Have you thought about where you would go? Have you considered any other options?

    We are a confidential 24/7 crisis line. You are welcome to call us here at 1800RUNAWAY (786-2929) to discuss your situation in more detail and possible options.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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    • #3
      Re: My parents are getting "too" involved and it's making me sna

      I haven't run away before, but have thought about it more than once, especially when there's no one around to stop me. My mom isn't as obsessed as my dad, but she at least listens if she bring up my grades. She lets me talk about why they're the way they are. I've thought about talking to my counselor, but I'm afraid he might call my parents and tell them. I know how to survive for a few days because I'm in Boy Scouts, and I have a good idea of where to run away to. It does upset me when my dad brings up the bad grades, but he won't let me explain at all, and talking to him is a hassle because he's at work all day. He's always cranky when he get home so I cant talk to him. If i try to talk to him on the weekends, he just tells me not to bother him. My parents probably would file a runaway report if I did run away. I know it would make them sad if I ran away, but it would only be for a few days.I just want to talk, and running away would be a distraction which would allow me to do so. I would come back, but I don't know how much trouble I would get in once I did.

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      • #4
        Re: My parents are getting "too" involved and it's making me sna

        Thank you for continuing to share your situation with us here at NRS. It sounds like you are still frustrated with the way your dad involves himself with your grades. You mentioned your mom not being as obsessive and that she listens. Is talking this over with her an option? You also stated that you have thought about talking this over with a counselor, but are worried they might tell your parents. What do you think would happen if your counselor did call your parents? Would going to counseling be another option?

        You mentioned running away, but only for a few days. What would your plan be? You mentioned Boy Scouts and being able to survive. What exactly does surviving look like for you? What would you do for food, shelter, and other necessities? We cannot tell you whether to run away or not, but if you would like to call us at our hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY, we would be happy to continue discussing your situation. Good luck, and if you need any additional assistance, you can call our hotline listed above.

        -NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: My parents are getting "too" involved and it's making me sna

          I am honestly at the edge of leaving. My parents are starting to control my life all together. I can drive now and I can leave whenever I want. I can get money by taking their credit cards and just leaving. i think i might just go away for years and not see them again until I'm older. This will show them all together that my life is mine and they cant control me. They just don't understand anymore, and talking to them is impossible. It's like they are trying to make me into what they want me to be, not what i want to be. I am actually thinking about packing a bag and leaving tonight while they are all asleep. They have just pushed me to that point and none of them will listen anymore. Please respond to this as soon as you can so I can get some helpful advice.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: My parents are getting "too" involved and it's making me sna

            Hello,

            Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Switchboard. It is nice that you took the time to check in with us about your situation. It sounds like you are about done with home and it is about time you get away. We imagine this was probably not an easy decision to make and we empathize with the struggles you are going through. We want you to know that we are always here for you wherever you go and whenever you decide to leave.

            We wish to hear from you directly if you wanted someone to talk to about what you are going through. We are confidential and anonymous. We are all trained the same way and want to provide a listening ear to our callers. We are supportive and can provide you with options for shelters. There are places you might be able to can that can require consent from parents but it is a matter of if you needed these resources to be safe.

            Have you thought about the alternative to leaving home? Have you talk about another adult about the matter? It sounds like your plan is to take the car and travel with one of your parent's credit card. Are they likely to check it when you use it on the road? It seems like leaving "bread crumbs" along the way. How do you feel about that? Do you think it gives them a sense of your direction? We hear you on needing to get away and it is something only you can know for sure that you are ready for.

            You mentioned taking the car on the trip. What if your parents decided to call it in as stolen? This can stay on your record for having grand theft auto. We raise these points to give you a sense of what may or may not happen but only you know for sure what your parents might do in this case. Have you thought about cooling off by going to another relative to stay for a while?

            It might help to just be away from home from your parents as you find the time to figure things out. However, if you wish to clear your head and get more support and resources, do not hesitate to call us at 1800RUNAWAY. We are 24 hours a day and you are guaranteed to speed with someone without judgment or bias. We wish you the best and good luck until we get a call from you.

            -NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment

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