I just cant take it anymore.

[Unregistered]

I can't stand being at home anymore. My Mum and Step-Dad treat me like I am just one of their possestions. They tell me off for everything. Its always "You didn't do this properly" or "You didn't do this.". I get told off for not doing something that they didn't even tell me to do. They expect me to be able to read minds. They always tell me to do stuff without being asked. I do something they didn't ask (or more so demand) I do and they complain. They don't like the way I did it or they didn't want that done. Most of the time its just my step-dad my sister and I at home. Of course when ever my parents say something about the quality of my work my sister has to but In. I get in trouble if I say anything to my sister. They are always worried that I will say something and as a result of me saying this my sister will go and cut. I'm sick of it, I'm not living in fear of my sister cutting. It is not my fault she suffers from post traumatic stress disorder. My mum is always stressed because she also suffers from PTSD. Its all because of my biological father. He was abusive. My mum and sister will say that I am not to blame for what happened. I really don't feel like they mean it. My step-dad says he knows about what my father did. He may know but that doesn't mean he undersatnds . My mum is always working. I swear she cares more about her job than me. Her job always comes first she doesn't even care about me. On the extremely rare occasion that I do something that my parents are happy with they say I have learnt a day out. The other day I was doing some gardening and Mum said she was going to take me to the swimming pools as a reward. Today when I asked her about it she backed down. I could understand and accept this if it only happened occasionally. But it happens every time I have earnt anything. I hate being at home. I don't feel at home here. Its more like a prison.As its currently the school holidays my mum and step-dad are pushing me to socialise. I have been trying to organise stuff with my friends but they either don't like doing what I have suggested or are busy. My parents yell at me because my friends are busy. I can't control what my friends are doing. I have told family about how I am feeling but they will not listen to the full story. They just assume I am being a moody teenager. Or I am just being oversensitive. So speaking up does nothing. I tried talking to the school chaplain about my problems but he went and told his wife and broke my trust. I talked to a girl who I thought was my friend. She told everyone what I said. I have since moved schools. At my new school everything started okay but some boys started giving me crap. It doesn't help that my best-friend moved away. At school I get crap and at home I get crap. I just don't want to stay around if all I am going to get given is crap. The only thing I have going in my life is Scouts. (In Australia both girls and boys can be scouts.) I can't talk to anyone in my scout group because they just won't understand. Plus I don't want to make things all serious cause the reason I like going there is because it is a care free environment. People at scouts are starting to realise that don't want to go home. I am always the one who kinda hangs around until I actually have to go home.I really want to run away and leave my problems behind. If living with my problems has taught me one thing it has taught me that my problems are things I can not control. I know that I'm going to get told to reach out for help and all that kinda stuff. I have reached out for help multiple times. You can't reach out for help that is not there. The only person I truly trusted has moved away. Once upon a time I trusted other people. My mum dragged me away from those people. I used to live near them but now I live 3600 km away. I didn't want to move away. But because I am simply one of my Mum's possetions I had no choice. I would give nearly anything to go back. I really miss the home and the friends I had there. I CANT RUN AWAY I HAVE NO WHERE TO GO. I may not be able to run away but that does not stop me from wanting to. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE HELP. I need some advice.i will always want to go back to my friends from before I moved away. But legally a 14 year old girl can not move out of home. I know this help-line is American so you may not know places that I can go to. Which is okay I am not asking for places I can go to for help.I AM ASKING FOR ADVICE!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ccsmod6]

RE: I just cant take it anymore.

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like there is a lot of tension at home between you and your family. You mentioned your mother and sister suffer from mental health issues that also has been affecting you. It sounds overwhelming. We also imagine it is quite challenging for you to live at home where you feel judged and criticized constantly by your family. It seems you are just looking for support, love, and understanding from them. We are glad you reached out and shared some of your story. Your story speaks of resilience and strength within you, and it seems you may benefit from talking more about how this has been affecting you; a safe space to call your own.

We are here as support to you and want to help as best as possible. Unfortunately, we are unable to provide advice or suggestions. What we can do is listen and explore options that may help. Sometimes informal support such as family or friends may not be the best option. Counselors or therapists can help families and individuals navigate difficult transitions and changes in life. If you would like resources to help, we will do our best to locate some.

Please consider reaching out by phone chat so that we can help further.

We wish you will and look forward to hearing from you.

Take care,

NRS