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17, Being abused and want to move out.

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  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Hi I’m a parent I live in L.A.

    Hello,
    Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you might want to consider speaking with a lawyer since this involves custody. You stated your daughter is being abused by mom. You or she can also file an abuse report with child services in her home state.
    She does not deserve to get abused. We understand how difficult this must be for you and her. To file an abuse report contact Child help 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org

    We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Take care,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi,
    I’m a parent I live in LA California and my daughter lives in Vegas with her mom my daughter she’s 17 years and she is getting abused by her mom she gets hits for no reason and she wants to move with me to California. How can I bring her to live with me?
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 10-04-2019, 12:14 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us. We are glad that you did. It sounds like things are really hard at home with being belittled and emotionally abused. You don’t deserve to be treated this way by the woman and her husband. We are glad that your sister is supportive and sought help from her teacher, and sorry that CPS was no help.
    We are here to listen and to help you. You matter to us and your life matters and we would really like to help you talk over your options. It sounds like you have family or friends who are supportive of you and we are glad about that. We would really like to speak with you to talk over your situation and to help you identify your options.
    All of our services are confidential and you can reach out either through our telephone hotline at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY) or with live chat through 1800runawy.org We are here for you 24/7 to listen and help.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Sincerely,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I’m 14,and mainly the woman who has custody of me and her husband I feel emotionally abuse me they talk about my flaws I told her I wanted to be a model she said I can’t be one because I have to much acne they belittle me with there words they don’t physically abuse me but my big sister reached out to a teacher for advice and the teacher called child protective services but they were no help I feel if I continue to live here I will not make it till I’m 18(that’s when I can legally move out)but I feel like I won’t make it to 18 because they make me wanna kill myself.idk what else to do if I run away I have places to go but I don’t want the adults to get in trouble for letting me stay there do u have any advice?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod16
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello -

    Thank you so much for reaching out for help. What you described sounds like really painful emotional and verbal abuse, as well as threats of physical abuse. No one deserves to have their mental health problems dismissed, you deserve people in your life who prioritize your safety and emotional well-being.

    When you say you reached out to social services, do you mean that you have filed an abuse report with Child Protective Services? If not, that might still be an option, if you would like to open an investigation into your parents’ behavior. Whatever social services agency you contacted, we are so sorry they weren’t more helpful. But it shows your strength and ability to advocate for yourself, that you were able to take that step.

    Your safety and well-being is the most important thing, and there are people who care if you are okay, even if it doesn’t always feel that way. If you would like to speak to someone about your self-harm urges, you could call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. They don’t only work with people who are suicidal, and they can talk to you about what you are feeling, and finding ways to cope with those feelings. If you are more comfortable texting instead, you can contact the Crisis Text Line, by texting HOME to 741741, in order to talk to a trained counselor over text. And finally, you can find other resources about coping with emotional turmoil and self-harm at the website Self-Injury Outreach & Support: http://sioutreach.org/

    It sounds like you’ve already done research about emancipation, and do not think it is an option. We are not lawyers, but from what we’ve seen, while Kentucky does not have any laws specifying the emancipation procedure, it can still be possible in certain situations. Unfortunately, it is definitely true that emancipation is almost always a complicated process that takes a long time, and typically requires the youth to have their own source of employment, housing, and transportation. You can always call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY, to discuss what options are available. We could refer you to legal services regarding emancipation (we would need to know what area of Kentucky you live in), and we can also provide emotional support and resources that you might need right now.

    You seem like a resilient and resourceful person, in a really painful and scary situation. We are here 24/7, if you ever need someone to listen.

    We look forward to hearing from you,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi, I'm 12 years old and I'm not 100% sure this could be considered abuse but anyway. My dad is 24/7 telling that I'm a whore, slut, **********, and that I'm a huge embarrassment/disappointment to my family. Also threatening to hit me with a belt, etc. Both of my parents tell me my anxiety and depression is fake even though I was clinically diagnosed and when my dad founded out that I had been cutting my wrists he told me to cut deeper. I've talked to social services they refuse to help me and I have nowhere else to go and Kentucky will not allow emancipation please help me. thanks

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a tough time. You do not deserved to be threatened and physically hurt, any type of abuse is unacceptable. You can make an abuse report by calling The Child Help Hotline at: 1800-422-4453. If you would like our help with making an abuse report you can call us at any time and we would be more than happy to help. If you ever feel like you are in immediate danger please call 911 ASAP.
    We are not legal experts but we do have general knowledge of the laws. In most states the legal age to leave home without permission is 18 years old. Because you are a minor if you were to leave home without permission you could be filed as a runaway. Running away is not a criminal offense it is a status offense. What that means is that if the police found you they would most likely bring you back home. You mentioned abuse if the police knew about this they may not take you home and let you stay somewhere else that is safe instead. Sometimes the police may not take a runaway report for someone who is 17 but it depends on the police department. You could always call your local non-emergency police department and ask them how they handle a runaway situation in your area. If ou call us we can help you look for shelters or explore your options for places to stay.
    We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore your options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support. We wish you the best of luck!
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    hi im 17 yrs old .. & cant wait till couple months for my birthday (6mo.) but basically my mom && i got in an argument && in result she physically put her hands on me .. punching me in my face while i was LAYING DOWNN && threatened me with a weapon “crowbar” & my “makeup mirror” i just dont feel safe anymore or wanted there. but i have somewhere else to lay my head , && continue to finish school some how. && she keep saying she gone call police on me as a run away but who would really wnt to stay w someone that could ever try pull a crowbar out on their DAUGHTER. would u feel safe? would u want to be there? could i still try leave , what do i need to do because i cant go no grouphome , nor jail .. and staying w her aint it.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline and sharing a little bit about what is going. It takes a lot of courage to reach out and especially in a time where you have a really tough and complex situation at home. We are sorry you are experiencing abuse, no one ever deserves to go through that. You do have the right to report the abuse to Child Help at 1-800-422-4453. You can either do it yourself or call into us directly and we can support you through it. It is hard to say the result of reporting, but if you call in you can ask what the process might look like.

    Also another way you can seek help is reaching out to a friend, teacher, or counselor at school that can help you look for resources. Your mental health is important. You can also look at SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) at samhsa.gov (call them directly at 1-877-726-4727) or NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness 1-800-950-NAMI to help you find the support that you need. If you do ever feel in direct danger, to yourself, or some else makes you feel that way, please call out to 911 or reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255).

    It can be difficult to know how to talk to your parents and express your feelings about how you are feeling. We would encourage you to reach out to a trusted adult, teacher, relative, and friend that you can talk to and potentially help you mediate a conversation with your parents about your current situation. At NRS, we do offer a service call conference calling, where you can call into our hotline and then we would reach out to your guardian and help advocate for you, help you express the needs you have to your parents.
    We are here for you and will support you in anyway that we can. Please feel free to call into us directly as we can talk further about your situation and find resources that are best for you in your area. Stay strong and you are not alone in this! Our hotline ( 1-800-RUNAWAY) and chat are open 24/7.

    We hope this response was helpful! We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey.

    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 12 i hate my life my family awalys hits me and and tells me off they are all against me sometimes i just go to ny corner cause i dont have a bed and i just cry and my parents buys my brother thats 17 a iphone and my sister and even my little sister have good stuff and they wear so much good clothes and i have to wear the same stuff everyday and i have a ********ty phone i found one day it a ********en free phone and i just wanna die or move out and get a job someone please come help me im just gonna end up killing myslef

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply: Hi I’ve never used this site before..


    Hello,

    You mentioned some things that raise concern for your safety and well-being. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. It generally ranges from no danger (the youth stays in the home, some services are given, and the case is closed), moderate danger (they will provide family services with possible temporary displacement) and high danger (they will remove the youth from the home and offer certain services).
    you don't deserve to be abused in any way. It is not your fault that this has been happening.

    If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

    Should your mother put you out of the home you can make a report to the police and provide them with information about your well -being. In some situations with a youth being so close to turning 18 the police may decide not to force you to return home if a wellness check satisfies the officer that you are indeed safe. Take note that the police are also mandated reports and could also decide to contact child protective services. If you would like to talk more about your situation we are here to listen and here to help. You may contact NRS at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or www.1800runaway.org (Live chat).

    Please be safe.
    NRS

    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I’ve never used this site before but I am trying to figure out how I am able to leave my house without having the cops called. My mom gets physical and very violent when she’s mad. She throws things and hits me often, and calls names and says very hurtful things. I don’t want to get into detail but I have a place to stay I want to move out. I am 17 and will be 18 in 6 months. She has told me to pack my bags and to leave because she doesn’t want me here. My fear is that once I do that she will change her mind after I’ve already moved out or when I’m trying to move out and call the cops. After she has told me to leave several times and given me permission. What should I do if she calls the cops and they try to bring me back home?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod7
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you were unsafe and home and ran away awhile ago. Abuse is never okay and you deserve to be treated with respect. Here at NRS, we truly want to be a support for you during this time.

    From what you have said, it's hard to know what your options are and what your current situation is. If you need to get to a safe place, please do not hesitate to call or chat us if you need help locating the nearest runaway and homeless youth shelter. You might also text the National Safe Place to find the nearest safe place. "Text the word “safe” and your current location (address, city, state) to 4HELP (44357). Within seconds, you will receive a message with the closest Safe Place site and phone number for the local youth agency. For immediate help, reply with “2chat” to text interactively with a trained counselor." www.nationalsafeplace.org. If you are in immediate danger please call 911.

    Also if you call or chat us we can confidentially talk through your options with you, so you are more informed and you can make the best decision for you. If you ran away from a safe place, and are now in an unsafe place we might be able to help you get back home. If you are currently at home and it is unsafe we can help you file an abuse report for you or make a safety plan.

    Please know that you are not alone, and we look forward to hearing from you. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org.

    Be safe,

    NRS
    Last edited by ccsmod7; 01-27-2019, 04:01 PM.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 17 and I’m being I was being abused I ran away one yr ago what can I do

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. It makes sense that you’re interested in leaving home and we’ll try our best to answer your questions. You deserve to feel supported through this.
    You mentioned that your mom has gotten violent and it sounds like you might be experiencing abuse at home. That is never okay and if you are interested you could consider contacting Child Help, which is the National Child Abuse Hotline. They can provide options for you on how to report if that’s of interest to you or support you with other opportunities. They can be reached at 1-800-422-4453 or at www.childhelp.org
    It makes sense that you aren’t interested in going back into the system. If you have an old case worker that you used to work with they might be helpful in navigating this with you. As you mentioned, emancipation can take a bit of time, unfortunately it doesn’t typically take effect until after the court approves it. So since you’re 14 and if you were to leave your house without your parent’s permission, there’s a chance that they could file a runaway report which would mean that you’d be returned home.
    It’s understandable that you no longer want to feel depressed. It could be helpful to talk to someone you trust like someone at school. If you are interested in more stable mental health support you could also consider looking up the National Alliance on Mental Illness. They can be reached at 1-800-950-NAMI or you can text NAMI to 741741
    We wish you the best of luck and please feel free to contact us 24/7 and toll free at 1-800-786-2929 should you need any additional support.
    Best,
    NRS
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