Ever since I was young, my parents both drank and often did not get along. The fights were constant and thats really all I remember about my parents then. My mom was always the one who was on me and my sister's sides. She stuck up for us whenever he went pyscho. Well, Im older now and my dad has mellowed out quite a bit. Its my mom's position now has switched. We do not get along in the least. I would say its been atleast two years of fights. Lately, things have gotten worse. Im pretty good at chilling out and I really dont argue back to her. I know that the best way to settle our differences is to talk about it. One time, we were arguing and I was trying to stay calm so I asked to take a walk to cool off a bit. I really want to accomplish things here, fix things! She wouldn't even let me take a short walk. And lately she has starting calling me names (b-word, a-word, etc). I think that is rather inappropriate. We fight constantly, but its never over the usual things like chores or rules; I have no problems with their standards. I devised up a whole plan on emancipation, then upon considering the ill effects it may take upon my future education, so I ruled it out. Things get bad, then i think about things drastic, stick with those opinions then things start to get better and Im always fooled into thinking things will change.
But to get to the point, we recently had our worst fight. Im really tight with my morals, I do not curse (Never have or will), I do not have sex (only ever kissed a guy), etc and she knows all of this. We were at my grandparents when she freaked out. She told all my relatives, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, that we were arguing about me wanting to go off and screw around. We were actually talking about my wish to study in Italy a year after highschool. My uncle looked at me so bad, and my grandma didn't talk to me for the rest of the trip. That was completely uncalled for. Later that night she continued to dog me and told me how I will be the reason her and my father split up and that I am the sole reason her life is miserable. Exact words there. She said much much much much more things and its hard for me to believe she could say worse things but she did. I burst into tears whenever anyone mentions Saturday. I don't talk about it anymore. I mean, Im a straight A student, I watch my five year old sister for her a lot for favors, I get the groceries for her as favors. Ive done everything to win her approval. I clean, I cook, Ive tried everything! No matter what it still comes to this. I cannot stay here. I guess Im weak, but I just cannot take it anymore.
So, my plan is to stay with my friend for a few weeks. Her mom knows my situation and has offered me a room and a job. Ive thought about this a lot and this feels like the best solution.
I can continue to go to my school which is essential and Ill be safe. Ive told my dad of my plans and he agreed that it would be a good idea for us to get away from eachother to cool off, breathe a bit. Then maybe we can try to fix things? A problem there is, I either have to talk to my mom about wishing to leave (without his support because he has informed me he will not talk to her with/for me for fear of starting another fight) or I can leave without telling her. That was his advice, was to go without telling her. Play runaway and he will pretend he knows nothing. Im hoping this break can help things calm down, and maybe things can be fixed but if not, what then? Emancipation? Emancipated life is hard. If I made it through highschool, I can already pay for Yale through scholarships so college is taken care of. What do I do? Whats my best bet? I cant stay here. Please help me.
But to get to the point, we recently had our worst fight. Im really tight with my morals, I do not curse (Never have or will), I do not have sex (only ever kissed a guy), etc and she knows all of this. We were at my grandparents when she freaked out. She told all my relatives, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, that we were arguing about me wanting to go off and screw around. We were actually talking about my wish to study in Italy a year after highschool. My uncle looked at me so bad, and my grandma didn't talk to me for the rest of the trip. That was completely uncalled for. Later that night she continued to dog me and told me how I will be the reason her and my father split up and that I am the sole reason her life is miserable. Exact words there. She said much much much much more things and its hard for me to believe she could say worse things but she did. I burst into tears whenever anyone mentions Saturday. I don't talk about it anymore. I mean, Im a straight A student, I watch my five year old sister for her a lot for favors, I get the groceries for her as favors. Ive done everything to win her approval. I clean, I cook, Ive tried everything! No matter what it still comes to this. I cannot stay here. I guess Im weak, but I just cannot take it anymore.
So, my plan is to stay with my friend for a few weeks. Her mom knows my situation and has offered me a room and a job. Ive thought about this a lot and this feels like the best solution.
I can continue to go to my school which is essential and Ill be safe. Ive told my dad of my plans and he agreed that it would be a good idea for us to get away from eachother to cool off, breathe a bit. Then maybe we can try to fix things? A problem there is, I either have to talk to my mom about wishing to leave (without his support because he has informed me he will not talk to her with/for me for fear of starting another fight) or I can leave without telling her. That was his advice, was to go without telling her. Play runaway and he will pretend he knows nothing. Im hoping this break can help things calm down, and maybe things can be fixed but if not, what then? Emancipation? Emancipated life is hard. If I made it through highschool, I can already pay for Yale through scholarships so college is taken care of. What do I do? Whats my best bet? I cant stay here. Please help me.
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