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I'm a 12 year old girl and I never feel safe...

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  • I'm a 12 year old girl and I never feel safe...

    So, hi. I have many issues at mom and dad have always fought and fought and done sexual things while I was around, and have talked about divorcing or moving away from each other. My mom laughs at me and frequently looks at me as if I'm the most abnormal thing she's seen all day, and it really hurts me. My dad likes to slap me, although he doesn't do it much anymore, I feel like he will. My dad also forces me to hang out with him, and I don't want to do that. I have always felt unsafe around them, as they are extreme helicopter parents. My mom once saw that I was typing something, and pushed me off the chair to check all the tabs I've opened up, then took the laptop away and said I couldn't use it for the rest of the day. I no longer feel safe around them, like they'll punish me for doing the things they've told me not to do, and I know I've done bad things, so all I can do is hide from them. My passions are singing and doing impressions of people as well as voice acting, and I've always devoted time to doing these things, which help me feel better. I do these things in front of my sister and ask for her opinion, but she always criticizes me. She says that I'm horrible, or that I'm awful, or that I'll never be what I want to be successful at what I do. I even showed my self-harm to my mom once, saying that this is what I deserve, and I told her that I wanted to kill myself. She slapped me and said I was abnormal, that no normal person would ever do such a thing. Ever since, I've started to hide. Hide everything. I wouldn't share my feelings or things I'm doing with anyone. I started to criticize others for being abnormal, even if I know deep down that what they did was normal. I've started to separate the world into weak and strong, dumb and smart, imperfect and perfect, abnormal and normal, etc. I constantly have the feeling of not being safe and wanting to run away, but I stay because I know there's nowhere else for me to go, and I'll have no food, water, clothes, or anything. I'll just be some poor kid. But I don't want to stay here...please help.

  • #2
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

    Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

    If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe,

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


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