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  • Wanting to run away

    Hello, the common thing on this forum seems to be that most people are 15 and all seem to have ANGST so i wanted to vent some of this and get some advice from someone.

    So lets take this from the top,
    BACKGROUND
    My mother is the main reason why i want to run away, shes a very headstrong person (something that I seem to have learned from her) and as such she refuses to listen to reason. My mother has never been the gentlest when it comes to emotional things, so in the 7th grade I went through that "the world hates me and everyone is against me" phase which is just that... a phase. This is where my problems begin to happen because at the time i thought i was depressed (I look back on it now and realize how petty it was) so i was seeing my schools counselor and after enough time we had a meeting with my mother. Well the meeting didn't go too well and i was only left with an entire year of suicidal jokes and brutal belittling going as bad to the point of my mother pretending to cut her wrist as she shouted in as loud as she could in a mocking voice "I JUST WANT TO DIE". My mother also has a background of doing things that only benefit her like when she promised to take the family to Canada only to take the money herself and go to China by herself. She has tried to leave the house multiple times and every time she doesn't seem to to give us even a bit of regard. She can humiliate a person on the smallest thing and has no mercy when she does so. My mother lacks the ability to give her family a bit of regard and yet still claims that she does SO much for the family. While its true she does pay the bills for the house and every once in a while speaks to my teachers ( I'm no saint and i wont pretend to be one ) however it seems that that is the only thing she stands behind to justify what she does.

    PROBLEM NOW
    So i am not an only child, i have two sisters both older than me with one currently sitting happily with a masters degree and the other in college. My oldest sister (the one with the masters) has recently moved in with her boyfriend without being married to him. My mother does not seem to be all too keen on the idea and is now practically disowning my sister by refusing to attend thanksgiving if my sister and her boyfriend will be present ( remember how i said that she only does stuff that benefits her but hurts others? ). My other sister does not approve of my mothers actions and today i made the mistake of asking what the problem is between them. This argument diverged into an argument about our family life in general, highlights of it were "Then leave this is my house and i will stay in my house but YOU can leave" *Loud sobbing used to mock me* and "She is my daughter and i will do what is best for her" even when the choice is not hers anymore.

    Id like to hear what this forum has to think of this problem. Is this a common theme in the forum? Is there a way to get around this? Will running away to my sisters house do anything at all?

    thank you all in advance for reading this really lame story

  • #2
    re: Wanting to run away

    Hey there,

    You seem to be going through quite a bit with your mom. It must be really frustrating to have her be so controlling over you and your sisters’ lives. We have a number of youth who do contact us with similar situations. It may not be exactly the same, but there can be some things in common. Often, there are questions about running away and how to get out of those situations. And we normally are non-directive here, so what we can do is help you to think about possible options for you to stay safe. Earlier you mentioned that your mom and dad have shared custody, have you talked with your dad about what happens? Since he has some custody, you may be able to discuss options of living with him. Also, you mentioned staying with your sisters. They may be good resources for support have you spoken with them about how they handle dealing with your mom and how she talks to them?

    We aren’t legal experts, so we can’t say exactly what is going to happen with running away. In most states if you leave, and go to stay with your sisters who aren’t your legal guardians, they could get into trouble. There is also the possibility that you could be taken back home to your mom. We understand that it can be really difficult to deal with your mom being manipulative and having her mock you. You are very smart and resourceful, since you have tried a number of options on your own and you can reflect on what’s happening.

    If you need to, you can always contact us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We can talk about any possible options that you are thinking about. Lastly, please note that we offer a live chat via our website at www.1800runaway.org every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST.

    Best,

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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