Was thinking about running away

[Unregistered]

Hi, so I've just turned 17 and have been having trouble with my mom. Actually, it's more of an issue with her boyfriend. A few years ago, he had broken into our house and choked/hit her. That was the only time he had ever hit her (so my mom claims). After that, my mom got a restraining order against him and he was forced to take anger management classes. He never stopped texting her, however, and I found out that they were seeing each other behind my back. Near January of this year, they got back together because the restraining order was over and I decided to give him another chance so my mom could be happy. Recently, he has been coming home drunk and harassing my mom to the point where I had to make her sleep on the couch because I was afraid he might do something to her. My mom told me later on that if he gets drunk again, she would break up with him. And then for another two days he kept coming home drunk and worrying me again. Every time I brought up her breaking up with him, she would yell at me. He hasn't been drunk again in the past few days, but I know that whenever a problem arises, he will get drunk because that's what he always does. He left the house today because I threatened to live with my dad if she doesn't make him leave (he doesn't have full custody and would need a mental evaluation to be able to see me) and she took my phone and read the texts to my sister (she is 18 so can talk to him when she wants) where I was asking her to ask my dad about his plans to see me. She got really mad and was screaming at me, all because I was worried about her safety. I said that if she wouldn't let me see my dad, I would go to my Grandma's or aunts. She then told me how everyone basically doesn't like me and that all I do is make messes so no one would ever take me. Plus, my Grandma is going through some medical issues and wouldn't be able to afford it. She's making me feel so bad about something I shouldn't be feeling bad about. I don't think she's taking me seriously and I want to go somewhere for a few days to let her know that I'm serious. I was planning on waiting a couple weeks to see how things go and then when I get my paycheck, maybe gather some food and find a place to sleep for a couple nights, like a park. I also take online school so I was planning on hanging out at the library during the days to do that. My mom isn't a bad mom but when it comes to her boyfriend, I feel like I don't even matter, especially with the things she says to me while she's mad.

[ccsmod6]

RE: Was thinking about running away

Hello there,

Thank you for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you are wanting the relationship with your mom to improve but feel her boyfriend is taking the focus away with his alcohol issues and behavior. You mentioned how you and your mom tend to argue and she makes you feel bad about things. We imagine that hurts to feel she is choosing him over you. You seem to care a lot about your mom, and it seems you just want her to realize how much this has been affecting you and your relationship. It also seems you just want things to get better between you both, without her boyfriend getting in the way. It is often best to talk things out and explore ways to work through your current situation to remain safe and make a decision that is best for you. This can be with a trusted friend, family member, or professional support such as counselors, social workers, or teachers. We are also here for you and would love to be able to speak with you on the phone or chat if you are able. We have a database of resources that may help you especially if you are needing a safe place to stay.

Please reach out to speak more about your situation and to get some support and resources that can help you.

We wish you well and hope that whatever you decide to do, you are safe.

Best,

NRS