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I am 15 and i want to go live with my friends family

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  • ccsmod8
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there –

    Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. From reading your post it sounds like have been facing a lot of abuse in your household by your grandmother. No one deserves to be treated that way at all. You are very strong to go through something like that and still keep pushing and fighting for a better life for yourself. If it gets to the point where you feel like you are going to be physically harmed, to the point where it might land you in the hospital you have the right to report any abuse to child protective service in your state. You have rights too.

    We do want to say that it must be very hard for you to have to go through all of this. It sounds like a very stressful situation for you at home and you find it hard to cope with certain things. You shouldn't be afraid to tell other people what you are thinking about doing especially if you are thinking about hurting yourself. You are certainly not alone in this and there are many many people that are here to help you. A good resource might be to call the ‘National Suicide Hotline’ for someone to talk about what thoughts you might be thinking at the time. Their number is 800.273.TALK. They also have an online chat service that might be of help to you especially if you don’t feel like calling in (https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/). There is also “NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness)” that you can reach out to as well (https://www.nami.org/help).

    Since moving out under the age of 18 years old is such a common question that we get and can be easily found, we aren’t going to get into what would happen if you left without permission from your legal guardian. If you have some specific questions that you want to ask us or maybe find a place to vent about what you are feeling right now you can reach out to us via our 24-hour hotline and online chat.

    It’s hard to talk to just anyone one about what has been going on. Please rest assured that we are completing confidential. So anything that you share with us will stay between us.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 15 and I live in TX in a toxic household

    I live with my grandparents and my grandmother keeps talking about me behind my back to my sister, 17, about how much they want me to leave and how much better their lives would be if I wasn't around. Last week I texted my friend to come pick me up so I can stay with her for a few days because my grandma said she wants me to leave. And as soon as they said they're on their way I told my grandmother. Her response was "No! You are NOT leaving! I haven't even met them!" and I told her that they will talk to her as soon as they come over. When they came over they were yelled at be my grandma and she yelled at them to "get the fu** off my property." My friends dad said that he wasn't trying to fight with her. But my grandma called the police and they left.

    If they yell at me to leave and I try to leave, why wont they let me go?

    My grandmother blames everything on my mental illness like I'm a psycho. All I have is depression and anxiety and a little bit of anger issues.

    Also, when my sister talks back in a bit**y way then she isn't punished. But when I say something in a nice and calm way I get my phone taken away and get yelled at like I purposely stomped on someone's foot. Why am I treated so differently? I wanna be normal... I wanna be okay... But I can't when I'm here...

    They degrade me and make me feel so worthless and useless... My brother tells me to kill myself sometimes... I don't want to though... I'm taking my pills again... but I dont think they're enough. My grandma took all my electronics away so I can't use my useful coping mechanisms. And I told her that I need my phone to feel better but she thinks all I do is stay on it and text my friends and do stupid teenager things and she thinks I'll "be so much happier without it" I'm better with it. Hell I stay in my room so they dont have to deal with me. I only come out of my room to eat and use the restroom but once I come out I get yelled at... I'm tired of it. I just wanna be happy... and the police said they can't do anything about it... they said "you have to deal with it until you're 18" And I've told them that yelling and screaming messes with my anxiety and it's a trigger but they don't care... they do it anyways.

    I want to move out and live with my friend. I turn 16 in August.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. No one deserves to be mentally abused for any reason. Leaving home is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.

    Coming out can be a scary process since it requires a certain degree of vulnerability and holds a lot of uncertainty. Your bravery and resilience throughout this process is so admirable. It's disappointing that your parents are not supportive like they should be. You are not alone in this and the LGBT National Youth Talkline is a great resource that offers support for young people in similar situations to your own. The hotline is run by those that are familiar with the issues and experiences of those that are also a part of the LGBTQ community. You can reach them by calling 1-800-246-7743 or you can check out their website at gltbhotline.org. You can also check out the Trevor Project, an organization dedicated to helping LGBT teens, by calling 866-488-7386 or by going to thetrevorproject.org.

    It seems like your parents aren’t fully understanding you when you are trying to relay your thoughts and feelings about how hurtful they have been. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your parents so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Im 15 and i live with my mom and her parents. They r homophobic and im gay. In ways im menatly abused im allways geting yelled at or called names like being worthless. Its to much for me to handle and it affects my school work. I spend all my time trying to avoid going home and its exsausting.i have a freind and her family has told me if my situation gets bad enough they would let me love with them. Ik i have to get my mom to sign some paperwork but ik she wont. But i do need to get away from my family i cant live on like this for 4 more years.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,
    Thanks for reaching out to NRS. It seems like you have been going through a lot at home and feel as if there’s nothing you can do right. It’s understandable to feel sick of that kind of place when its causing you to feel depressed at home.
    Its good that you have an outlet in going on walks, but it seems like having someone to talk to about these feelings may help as well. You could talk to a school counselor, or therapist about what is happening and they may have some ideas for how to cope. If you want help reaching out to on we can try and help with that if you call our hotline.
    Another options to look into is more ways to cope with what is happening around you. This may be a new hobby, a book, or volunteering. Pretty much things that give you an excuse to be outside the house.
    Hopefully this information is helpful, if you want more help or just need to talk you can always reach out to our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us online.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi

    Im 15 and curently liiving with my parents. evrytime when i do good things like wash th dishes and take out the washing my mom always yells at me and im sick of it. Also on the other hand my dad. everytime my dad gets drunk he blames everything on me and i am sick of it. i am dealing with depression and the only way is to relive myself from depression is going for walks. but i havent been doing that cause my mom wants me to do everything

    please help

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    It took a lot of bravery to write a post on our bulletin to ask for help. It sounds like your dad is not making home a safe place. Abuse of any kind is not okay and it should not be happening. You deserve to live somewhere you feel safe and supported.

    Two options to live away from your legal guardian are either getting your dad's permission to live with your friend's family or getting child protective services involved. Sometimes having an adult to advocate on your behalf can make communicating your needs more effective and easier. Perhaps your friend's parents can help you have a conversation with your dad about you living with them at least temporarily.

    If you would like to learn more about making a report to child protective services, you can reach out to an advocate at an organization called Child Help. They have more expert knowledge on the reporting process and you can contact them at 1-800-422-4453 or go to childhelp.org. If you are removed from your dad's care it does not necessarily guarantee you would be placed with your friend's family, but a social worker can help to ensure you have a safe place to live.

    We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

    We wish you the best,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 15 and I want to move out. My father is a very bad alcoholic and he verbally, and physically abuses me. None of my family members are willing to take me in, but my best friend's family would. What do I have to do to move in with them legally?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It is great that you reached out on behalf of your friend, it shows that you are a supportive friend.
    We are sorry to hear that your friend is going through such a difficult time right now, and they are not alone. They do have the right to make an abuse report, that wouldn’t necessarily mean that their mom would go to jail. Usually a case manager would be assigned to the case and they would help decide what services need to be provided. They can make an abuse report by calling Child Help at: 1800-422-4453. They can also call us and we can help them with making an abuse report. If your friend is ever in immediate danger please call 911.
    Also dealing with suicidal thoughts and depression alone can be super difficult, and your friend does not have to deal with that alone. If they are ever feeling suicidal or just need someone to talk to they can call The National Suicide Prevention Hotline at: 1800-273-8255. There is always someone willing to provide support and listen. Another good resource may be NAMI (national alliance for mental illnesses). They can be reached at 1800-950-NAMI.
    We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support. Best of luck!
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I have a close friend who is 13. She lives with her mom, who abuses her daily, emotionally and physically. They struggle financially and she has no money to pay for college. Her dad lives on the other side of the world. (Her parents divorced). She has tried to commit suicide before, and I think she has depression. She has trouble sleeping too. I’m really worried about her. I don’t know what to do. I’ve told her to get help and tell adults about her mom but she won’t because she doesn’t want to get her mom in trouble. She also thinks the authorities won’t help. What would happen to her if her mom gets sent to jail? Could she come live with my family? I know she would be much happier away from her mom. Any advice is deeply appreciated

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    Thank you for taking the time to post on our Bulletin and for sharing a bit about your situation. It sounds like you have been through a lot and its become overwhelming at home. You do not deserve to have anyone talk down to you or say hurtful things. Home is supposed to be somewhere you feel safe and supported.

    It sounds like your friend and her grandmother are offering you a safe place to live where you would feel much more comfortable. The easiest way to leave home as a minor is with your guardian's permission. This would mean that your grandma gives you permission to live with your friend. Sometimes having an adult on your side to advocate for you can make communicating your needs more easier and ensure that the conversation stay calms. Perhaps your friend's grandmother can talk to your grandmother with you or on your behalf about you living with them.

    Now, if you were to leave without permission, your grandmother can report you as a runaway to the police. Running away is not illegal but it is a status offense. This means your grandmother can ask the police to return you home.

    The way your grandma treats you does sound like it might be considered emotional abuse. You do have the option to report this to child protective services to involve a social worker to help. There is an organization called Child Help that can help you make the report and give you more information about what CPS might do to intervene. You can contact them at 1-800-422-4453 or go to childhelp.org.

    We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you so much for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, and sharing a little bit of your story with us.
    It sounds like you are dealing with a lot right now. Home is supposed to be safe and welcoming, and it is unfortunate that is not the case in your situation. You do not deserve to be abused or manipulated and you do have a right to make a report. You can make an abuse report by calling Child Help at: 1800-422-4453. You can also call us and we would be happy to help you make a report. If you are ever in immediate danger please call the police.
    You also mentioned having suicidal thoughts, and we want you to know your life is valuable and you are worth living. You do not have to deal with these thoughts alone, there is help out there. You can always contact The National Suicide Prevention Hotline at: 1800-273-8255. There is always someone willing to listen and provide you support.
    You also mentioned wanting to leave home, we are not legal experts but we do have some information on what could possibly happen. If you were to leave home, your legal guardian does have the right to file a runaway report. If the police do find you they most likely would bring you back home. Also whoever you were to stay with could potentially get in trouble for harboring a runaway. If you do decide to leave and need somewhere safe please call us and we can try and help you look for a shelter.
    We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide you support. Best of luck!
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    In 2017 I was took from my parents due to many things and moved with my aunt, she gave up on me and now I am living with my grandma along with my 17 year old sister.My grandma talks crap about me and she yells at me 24/7. My friends have heard her and I have recordings of her saying things too. I have ptsd from my parents being abusive and etc. and she makes it worst with the yelling, it gives me very very bad flashbacks...I'm scared to go eat or just leave my room period. My friend and her grandmother said they are willing to let me move in but I'm scared grandma will start drama and yell at me and get in my face or even hit me. She already threatens to send me to a foster home and I don't want to lose my sister and my cat. I don't know what to do and I need help.

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    i’m 14 turning 15 in may and my parents have been divorced since i was 7. i’ve basically been manipulated and persuaded into harming myself by insults verbal and mental harassment and abuse. i want to live with my friends family because she’s genuinely amazing and her family is loving and accepting. my dad is a scary guy and my mom is NOT mentally stable. it would make life so much better and take away the suicidal thoughts from the picture. is it AT ALL possible to live with them?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you have been going through a difficult time. Having your parents think that you are just going through a phase can be hard. If you need to talk about this with someone who understands The LGBT National Hotline can be useful: 1888-843-4564.
    Cutting yourself can be dangerous so we hope that you have a safety plan. If you would like mental health resources you can contact NAMI (national alliance on mental illnesses). They can be reached at 1800-950-NAMI,
    It may be possible to become emancipated, but it usually takes a few months or more and can be costly. To find out more about emancipation you can call your local court house or call us for some legal aid resources.
    We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options, please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. We wish you the best of luck!
    NRS
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