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I am 15 and i want to go live with my friends family

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  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. It is understandable that you would want to leave a place where you do not have a close relationship with the people there. You questioned if you would need your mom’s permission as well as your dad’s to leave home. We want you to know that we are not legal experts but to our knowledge if you are planning on leaving it would be up to the parent who has guardianship. If it’s shared then yes, you would need to get both of them to agree. It sounds like things at home are at their tipping point and you feel as if things will be better for you living with a friend.
    If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    okay so i’m 15 and i live in a 2 bedroom apartment with my mom, dad and lil brother. my mom and i have an awful relationship and we don’t get along at all. it has gotten to the point where i can’t even be there and i need to be somewheres else. i love my mom but i like literally can’t deal with her. she’s constantly coming at me about everything and is always twisting me and my dads words. currently my dads the only one working and has been for the last 7 years because she won’t get a job. my bestfriend who lives in georgia offered to take me and i could live with them and i talked to my dad about it and he didn’t say no or yes he just said we’ll see... i was wondering if i have to get an okay with my mom too in order to leave or if i can just get everything situated with my dad. we haven’t talked to my mom about this either cause she always starts ******** and we don’t have the energy to deal with it.

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  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply: Hello I'm 15 I've been really depressed...


    Hello,
    Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We would like to be of assistance to you if we can. It is times like these that would be nice to have a listening ear. It is also important that you remember to exercise self- care. You did great by reaching out to NRS. Good for you.
    You don’t deserve to be bullied at school or home, what’s happening to you is not your fault. You did wonderful advocating for yourself. It sounds like you told your parents and school officials but nothing has been done to your satisfaction. That is unfortunate.

    We understand that it must be frustrating for you and we want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. It also sounds like you have confided in a friend that is willing to let you stay with them. Leaving home is a big step and there is a matter of concern for your safety. Again we understand that your situation is one that you want to see change.
    If you are feeling depressed or having thoughts of suicide we encourage you to seek help.
    Help is available. Contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255
    There are also anti-bullying programs you might consider reaching out to for support.
    https://www.pacer.org/bullying

    https://www.stopbullying.gov/

    These programs exist to provide extended help to those that face being bullied.

    NRS is here to listen and here to help.
    We can best help by phone or chat so that we might learn a little more about your situation and how we might assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    Take care,
    NRS

    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello I'm 15 I've been really depressed, suicidal, and unhappy with my me and family I'm constantly bullied in school talked to my counselor and principal told my parents nothing’s happened my siblings bully me I get yelled at a lot and I have a friend that is willing to take me in and provide for me I don't know how to get out of this house and I'm done working with my family I don't know what to do.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 02-07-2019, 02:20 AM.

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  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there!
    Thanks for reaching out to us and telling us what’s been going on. It sounds like you’re having a really rough time a home. It’s understandable that you feel overwhelmed and it takes courage to ask for help.
    You mentioned that you want to go live with your friend’s family. It might be a good idea to ask your parents if they would let you live with your friend’s family even temporarily. This would be considered an alternative living arrangement (ALA) and would be simple to set up if you got their permission. If you can’t get their permission, there might be some other options available to you. If you want to explore those options, you can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (24 hours a day, 7 days a week) or chat online with us at www.1800RUNAWAY.ORG.
    We are sorry that you are going through such a tough time. We understand that you are not wanting to live with your mom anymore. It sounds like you just want to live in an environment where you feel heard, loved, and supported. We’re here to listen and help the best way we can. We hope to talk or chat with you soon. Good luck!
    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 14 and want to live with my my best friends family



    Hi, I’m Austin and my parents yell at me constantly and blame everything on me when it comes to garbage or fighting. I get told to do everything when my siblings are sitting and doing nothing. They don’t support me being a youtuber and they downgrade me every time I try and tell them I failed a test or I don’t wanna do something. But when I’m at my friends house they treat my like their own I help out with cleaning and they have an extra room. They know how bad it is at my house and they want me to move in. They know how I get to do everything and they help with school. I’m cyber and they help out with my school work if I ask. My best friend and I have been friends for 9 years and he has a younger sister. I try hard in school and want to go into the army after school. But my parents aren’t supportive of me when it comes to school and going into the army. They barely by food and their is 10 people in my house, so if they buy food I can’t get any. They refuse to let me go to work with them when it is cleaning houses. My best friends family takes me with them on vacation and knobels and dorny park. We all have a lot of laughs. Like when their step dad scared me in the corn maze. My mom yells at me and treats everyone else different from me. I just hope I can move into my friends house bc they treat me like an actual person.

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  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi Sydney! We are glad you are reaching out to us because we are here to help! It sounds like you are going through a hard time, but reaching out to us is a good first step in figuring out your options.

    In your message mentioned that your sister is mentally and verbally abusive. We want you to know that no one deserves to be treated that way, especially by a sibling! Is your dad or stepmother aware of this behavior? They (or another trusted adult) may be able to help with how your sister is treating you by communicating on your behalf how that makes you feel and reasoning with her to stop such name calling. If not, temporarily removing yourself from the situation (or the longer term solution you are thinking of) may be a good option.

    You also mentioned that you have been struggling with depression, anxiety and bipolar disorder. It is very admirable that you have been attempting to seek help with those feeling despite the fact that you haven’t been able to receive support due to rescheduled appointments. It is also admirable that even through your difficult times, you are focused on your future and have found a friend able to support you.

    For your question, while we are not legal experts we do know a few pieces of information that may be of use. To fully transition guardianship, your parents may need to consent to passing guardianship through the court of law in order to gain custody. This may mean that lawyers and legal fees could be a part of the process. Do you think your parents would be willing to pay to go through that process? If not, there may be a way for you to live freely at your friend’s house and avoid legal involvement. In most cases, if a youth has written parental permission (such as a text or letter) from their guardian they can live elsewhere. The written permission is to avoid your parents calling the police and reporting you as a runaway. If they were to involve the police, you may not be in legal trouble, but they could have the option to press charges against your friend’s parents for “harboring a runaway.”

    As we said, we are here to help, but we are also here to listen. If you wanted to talk with us about the options we mentioned or brainstorm new ideas, our hotline at 1-800-786-2929 is 24/7 and confidential. We could also provide resources to legal aid for your area as well!

    Best of Luck!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 14 almost 15 and I’ve considered running away, but that doesn’t seem as good as an option because I’ll just be found. I want to be emancipated or able to live with one of my friends because I cannot take my family anymore. I’m constantly getting yelled at by my parents, I get blamed for everything. When my brother insults me my mom never believes it and when I was told I was messed up, my mom just said "yeah he’s right you are." it’s mentally exhausting and I’m tired of the negative crap all the time. It’s been going on for 6 years. I just don’t know how to bring it up to my mom I don’t want to live here anymore. What’s an easy simple way to bring it up without starting an argument?
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 12-12-2018, 07:23 AM.

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello, my name is Sydney. I have been struggling with my home life for a little while now and i’ve recently been offered to move in with my bestfriends family. Her mother asked me if i wouldn’t like to move in with them due to everything happening at home. I guess i should probably start with what’s happening first.. i am 14 years old. I am in my first year of high school and have been struggling with depression, anxiety and what we think is borderline personality disorder OR bipolar disorder, we arent completely sure because the first reason i want to leave is because my stepmother and my father keep rescheduling my therapist appointments to the point i never have enough time to explain everything to them. I want to do good in life, go to a good college such as columbia university or st. john’s unigersity and study writing and forensic anthropology. There are seven of us in a two bedroom home. Me, my grandma, my 16 year old sister, my 7 year old stepsister, my 8 year old stepbrother, my dad, my stepmother and my father. My sister has been very mentally and verbally abusive to me, telling me to kill myself, that no one wants me here, that i should just leave and not come back. My stepmom tries to take over my life as if she were my real mom, my dad was a really bad drug addict and addicted to pain killers (don’t know if he still isn’t or not), and my grandma is very old fashioned and doesn’t understands that i am not like a normal kid. I have mental issues and it can’t all be solved with some over the counter medication. My stepbrother sleeps in front of the dryer and me and my sisters share a single bedroom, while my dad and stepmom sleep on the couch and my grandma has the other room. It wasn’t always like this, i was living with my mother but she’s got put in prison, she gets out in 2022, charged with DUI and manslaughter. We still visit her and i love her to death, and i love my dad to death but being has here has made my grades and over all health go down hill. My hygiene is terrible and my motivation vanished. I used to get good grades but now i have D’s and F’s because i’m always tired. I’m always the one to clean and anytime i get money, it’s instantly taken from me and used for their cigarettes and other things.

    I don’t need a hotline or anything, i just want to know what legal procedures would have to take place for my friends family to take custody of me? Would both of my parents have to sign it, or could it be just one of them? My mother can still sign legal documents even though she is in prison and i now she’d want me to go stay with them because them they’re have a extra room for me, and their financial status is a lot better than my own family, they’ve offered to take care of me and id be going to a school with my old friends and i’d have a tutor to help me with my work, seeing as my friend is very smart and she’s agreed to help me if i needed it. I just need to know what’s procedures and documents would have to be done for me to be able to live within their custody, i would feel a lot safer with them.

    -Sincerely, Sydney

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  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply: I'm 14 (bout to turn 15)


    Hi there,

    You don’t deserve to be yelled at or called names by anyone. We understand how hurtful that must feel.
    It is not your fault that this is happening. It sounds like you have some supportive people around you that would like to help. That’s wonderful. Good for you.

    You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parent’s. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern
    Sometimes when communication is a struggle counseling is often looked at as an option.
    It can be a way to learn how to cope and express your feelings.
    NRS is here to listen and here to help. We are here to support you during such a difficult time.
    If you would like to speak more about your situation and explore some options to that might help figure out a plan of change, please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or www.1800runaway.org (Live chat).
    Great job reaching out today.

    Take care,
    NRS

    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 14 (bout to turn 15) and my parents and I don't get along that well. They always yell at me and call me names that are really hurtful. My best friends family loves me and I would love to live with them. But I know my parents wouldn't give permission what do I do? My best friends mum has said that she would always give me a place to stay if I need it and stuff. But idk what to do. I hate my current living situation. How can i be able to live with my friends family?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply: I am 15 years old and I live wth my mom.


    Hi,
    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.

    It sounds like you are in a tough situation and may be looking for some options to help cope with everything.
    We understand how difficult it must have been to speak about what you have been feeling.
    You are very brave for doing so. Good for you.
    NRS would like you to know we are here to support you at this difficult time.

    Sometimes having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your friend through this challenging time. NRS is here to listen and here to help. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

    Let us know how we might help, please contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) orwww.1800Runaway.org (live chat).

    Take care,
    NRS


    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 15 years old and I live with my mom. She is single because I’ve never had a father figure in my life. She is the most terrible person I will ever meet. She thinks only about herself and she doesn't even know the person I am because she judges too much. I can’t tell her anything about what my life is really even like or what I'm going through. She claims she cares but my other friends parents are actually there for them not judging and being there for all of their choices even the bad ones. I am struggling with school and have daily breakdowns BC I can’t handle it and am going to end up dropping out. I asked to get homeschooled and she was considering it telling me to talk to my counselor to see my options and I'm already failing in school and would get a job and do me and maybe start to be happy with myself by getting good grades. She said no because I "do drugs" "have sex" and lie. She goes through my phone and invades all of my privacy all the time and will get so mad at me and yell at me and make me have anxiety attacks. I want to run away or live with one of my friends who are actually happy and have a good relationship with their parents because I can’t take this anymore. Want to kill myself all the time and I never tell her anything BC she wouldn't ever understand.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 12-05-2018, 02:20 AM.

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  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply: My parents act crazy....

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

    It took a lot of courage for you to reach out. We appreciate you sharing your situation. It sounds like you’re quite upset with things at home right now and you mentioned being beat up pretty badly by your siblings. It is not right what they did to you. We’re sorry you’re going through this.
    You do not deserve to be abused physically, emotionally by anyone.
    It is not your fault that this is happening. You have no control over what others choose to do.
    It does not sound like your parent’s were available to you for help. That’s too bad.
    You must be very disappointed in the way they handled the situation.
    We are unsure if you required medical attention for any injuries you may have suffered.
    It is important to take care of yourself. You did a great job getting away from someone that was trying to sexually assault you. Something like this we understand can be a very traumatic experience.
    You did not mention if your parent’s were aware about what happened.
    For your information, you have the right to file a police report.

    It sounds like you have a supportive friend you can talk with. Good for you.
    Perhaps your grandparent’s or your friend’s house would be a safe place to go should things get out of hand with your brothers again. Your safety is important.

    NRS is here to listen and here to help.
    Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of options towards a solution previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We are limited as to how we can help in this type of forum. It also seems like you are worried about the relationship with your boyfriend. This along with the other issues at hand must be difficult for you. You did a great job expressing yourself and talking about your feelings. Good for you.

    If you would like to talk more in detail please call 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We hope writing in helped in some way.
    FYI:
    To report any abusive treatment there is Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.


    Be safe,
    NRS

    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My parents act crazy, I have good graders but this year I've been doing poorly in Science Honours. It is too late to leave the class, and the class average is 58%. I'm in grade ten and the emotional abuse I get from my parents is too much. Not just my parents, though. My older brother works out a lot and is very muscular and strong. A few months ago I was making dinner for my family (I have to do that most nights or I get in a lot of trouble), and my brother (lets call him Dan) walked up to me with a bucket and a spray bottle and soaked me and the dinner. I was so surprised. I turned to him and I said(my voice was barely above a whisper, and I was shaking because the water was so cold) "why... Dan I'm going to have to remake dinner can you help me clean this up, I need to go dry off." Dan hit me and then went downstairs. I followed him down( I don't know why) and stood outside of his door for about a minute, shaking, before he opened it. He yelled at me and yanked me inside. he screamed at me for getting his floor all wet and I just stood there, trying to figure out what to say. Then my twin(lets call him Mack... by the way, 'Mack' had been taking boxing lessons for months at this point), Mack walks in and asked Dan what was going on and Dan didn't say anything except he slapped me. Hard. Mack walked up and shoved me to the ground(he's a big, tall, strong guy) and kicked me. I yelled at them to stop(the second time I've spoken since I went downstairs) and the started beating me. Dan was calling me names such s a fu*^*ng cu*# and calling me a who**. I hadn't even had a boyfriend because I didn't want to go through drama, or get used for sexual things. The beat me up for a long time and kicked me- punching me so hard in the face, and kicking me in the head so many times and very hard that I had two very black eyes, and my whole face was purple and spotty. I got knocked unconscious for about a minute, and when I opened my eyes they were standing over me looking at me saying I deserved it and that if I say anything to my parents they'd knock me out again. When I stumbled up the stairs Dan said "are you okay?" and I fell again, not able to get up for about 10 seconds. I tripped my way up the stairs and went to the bathroom, locking the door and blacked out for who knows how long. I finally came to- I had a huge concussion and I threw up in the toilet. I phoned my best friend and was crying so hard I couldn't speak properly. She's a pretty good listener thank God.

    My parents were told that we were play fighting and Dan picked me up and I squirmed and got dropped and hit my head and fell down the stairs. About a few months later I finally told my mom what happened and she said, "Well there are two sides to every story, and he probably had a reason."

    By the way... I got in trouble for not finishing dinner that night.
    My dad beat me twice, he hasn't done it for a while though, and only my mom and 'Mack' know he did it (They only know about the one time). My parents constantly verbally abuse me and it's terrible. My best friend has offered for me to stay at her house, but I wouldn't be able to get rides to work that way, and also I don't want to disappoint my grandparents. We are really close and it would break them inside to see me leave home. I almost got raped as well- someone held me down and tried but he was thinner and only weighed 30 pounds more than me (I'm 104 pounds and I'm 15). I was able to get him off of me before it went too far. I did meet this guy though who doesn't want to have sex with me, and he's very sweet. We've been official for over a month now, but he doesn't know about any of this that goes on. If I have a new bruise I tell him it's from the horses I hang around with. He is starting to act odd though and I'm not sure why. But we will take things day by day. I don't know if I will go through with moving to my friend's house or not. Her family loves me and feels like a second family to me.


    Sorry for the TL;DR(too long; didn't read).
    If anyone has advice I'd love it, thanks for making it this far!
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 12-04-2018, 02:54 AM.

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