Nothing I Do Is Good Enough.

[Guest]

My parents were both honor roll students, and my dad was his school's valdictorian. My grades are usually 83-100%, but this year I got multiple Fs on my report card, which I am bringing home tomorrow. My sister got grounded for having a C, and that made me panic. My parents push me too hard on everything, and assume that my siblings and I will be super smart like them. I AM trying my hardest, but no matter what I do, my best is not good enough! I've tried to kill myself so many times, that I've lost track. The only thing that keeps me from running or killing myself is my best friend, and my crush. But now my Dad calls me a "stupid, mother****ing retard"{edited for langauge} if I get anything lower than an A. Even when I got an A-, he said that the grade was pathetic. I need SERIOUS help, but no one will listen to me.

[ccsmod0]

Re: Nothing I Do Is Good Enough.

Thank you for posting a bulletin. We are sorry to hear that grades have been very stressful for you and it sounds like a lot of pressure to do well. Do you feel comfortable talking to your dad or even both your parents about how you feel about expectation of getting A’s? Have you talked to anyone else about this (like teachers, school counselor, siblings)? It is tough to follow in someone else’s foot steps, when we are doing our best! We are glad to hear that you have your best friend and your crush for support. Do you think your parents will ground you for your grades? No one deserves to be called bad names because of their grades. We are sorry that it has happened to you.

It sounds like you have thought running away as a solutions. Have you run away before? Do you think that your parents would file runaway report? Your parents would have the right to file a runaway report with the local police. This is considered a status offense, which means you would be put in the data base. Do you know where you would go? With filing a runaway report, your parents would have the right to charge the person that you stay with as “harboring run away”.

You had mentioned that you have attempted suicide before. Are you currently feeling suicidal? How have you tried in the past? Have you talked to anyone about feeling suicidal (friend, sibling, family, teacher, counselor)? You are welcome to call the National Suicide hotline at 1800-273-TALK (8555) if you want to discuss feeling sad, depress or suicidal.

We are also available if you want to talk in more detail about anything. We are here 24/7 and are completely confidential. You are welcome to call us at 1800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We look forward in hearing from you and wish you the best!




~NRS

[Guest]

Re: Nothing I Do Is Good Enough.

Hey, thanks for you're advice. I am very appreciative of how quickly you replied to my post. I am terrified of speaking with either of my parents.I brought my report card home and when they saw it my mom and dad grounded me and banned me from seeing my friends. Dad threw a bottle of beer at my head when I tried to talk to him about it, and I now have a deep cut from where the glass entered my skin. When I started crying he hit me with a plate from the table we were at, saying that I had "no right to cry, I deserved it". I've told every adult I know about what he did to me, but no one believes me, because my dad is a well known attorney in our area. I've even shown people my wounds, but they say I'm doing it to get attention. My parents said they'd do the same to my little brother and sister if I told anyone else about what dad did. I love my siblings more than anything else in the world, and if anything happened to them, I would be devastated. What should I do?

[ccsmod0]

Re: Nothing I Do Is Good Enough.

You’re welcome. Wow, we are so sorry that your dad has been hitting and throwing things at you. No one deserves to be hurt like that. Do you think that would need to see a doctor to have the cut checked out? It is very understandable that you are terrified about talking to your parents, especially after show them your report card. It sounds frustrating that you have tried to reach out for help from adults, only to not be taken seriously. You had mention that your parents told you that if you say anything to others that they would do the same to your younger brother and sister. But it also sounded like you had talked to others about it? Have your younger siblings experienced the same abuse before? We are not here to necessarily here to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. We can however help with options, so you can decide what is best for yourself and your siblings. You have a lot of strength to protect your brother and sister from the abuse.

We can help with making phone calls if you want make a report to Child Protective Services (CPS) or Department of Child and Family Services (DCFS) by doing a conference call (3-way call).You can also call Child Help USA to get local number for CPS at 1-800-422-4453. Their job is to keep you safe. We look forward to talking with you and you can call anytime at 1800RUNAWAY (786-2929).

~NRS

[Guest]

Re: Nothing I Do Is Good Enough.

Did AbbyK. call your hotline? She is my daughter, AK, and I demand that you stop telling her what to do you...! She acts lke she is abused to get attention, she always has. So keep your ...comments to yourselves!

[ccsmod8]

Re: Nothing I Do Is Good Enough.

Hello,

Thank you for your honesty with how you are feeling at this time. We appreciate that you wrote to us with your crisis. We are please to know that people in the community can contact us whenever they need us. We are sorry to hear that you are having trouble with your daughter but we want to be there for you and her if you need to call us for resources. We are here 24 hours a day and can be reached at 1800RUNAWAY of you are looking to speak to someone in person. We can be a listening ear to you. We are also anonymous and never judge you. The main issue we want to stress to you is now confidential we are. Therefore, we have no real way of knowing if your daughter contacted us since we do not ask for names of our callers. We maintain a strict code of gaining our callers confidence so that they know to count on us when they really need to.

The only time we get pass confidentiality is if we are given names, number and addresses for caller's parents. We are mandated to report abuse if a child calls us with that info but even at this point. We respect the caller's rights to self determination. We do not force our callers to offer us info. We simply respect their rights and take the call in whatever direction they wish to. Please let us know if there is anything further we can do for you in the future. Good luck.

-NRS