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I want a better life..

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  • I want a better life..

    I'm 16 years old and over the past few months I have actually been considering on leaving my parents house and living with my grandparents. I love my mom and dad to death, I could never say I actually really truly hate them, because I don't. Now,that may sound odd, if I don't hate them and I love them why am I considering on leaving and being with my grandparents. It may not seem like it, but my family has major family issues. About 3 or 4 years ago, my parents go into a fight with my grandparents, and my uncle...and ever since then..things changed. My parents use to be very fun and happy people, they had lots of friends, my dad had his own business, my mom was a stay at home mom..we had a beautiful home and my grandparents lived with us..it was all perfect. Until they got into with my grandparents and uncle...we were not allowed to see my uncle after that..it was my mom rules. I thought it was stupid at the age of 13 because I guess I didn't understand...all I knew after that fight..my parents were being blamed for many things..my grandparents hated my dad..they blamed my mom for being on pills. I guess over the years the fuss died down for everyone...we didn't see our uncle and my grandparents and parents let go of what happened..basically pretend nothing happen. Then one day..a fight broke out again between my grandma and my mom..and the same old blame was said about pills...my mother swore up and down that she quit..that it happen years ago..so why they bringing it up now??? My grandparents decided to move out that summer...and everything seem to go back down hill. My mom went back to work, and my dad started slowing down in business, then I started to notices things around the house going missing..from the dvd player..to our huge flat screen tv..it wasn't until I heard a conversation with my parents that all that stuff..was being pawned for..money. I tried letting it go...letting everything go..hoping it was just a one time thing..until my parents told me we were moving. Moving away from my childhood best friend..moving away from the neighborhood I grew up in...I didn't understand why..I asked why..they told " because we have too." so we packed for at least a month..but that whole month my dad never went to work...never left for work..and he was so worried that truck stayed in the garage...and more stuff was being sold and pawned..my mom had more garage sales then usual....finally i had to see what was going on..and my dad was keeping the truck inside because..he stopped paying his truck bills.."he didn't feel like paying them anymore" so a tow truck driver was out to get the truck..many times had we run into a tow trucker..who talked to my dad about taking the truck..but my dad told us as long as we stayed in the truck they cant take it...as long as its on our property they cant take it. Fast forwarding to after the move...we had no place to live..because we had no money..but I didn't understand why..because they pawned things..my dad never payed his bills..where is the money? My grandma took us back in under her wing...and my parents swore " we will only be here for a few weeks" well.. a few weeks because into a few months..into a year..until my nana moved out and bought her beautiful house. Well..we couldn't live with her at the time because my uncle came to visit her brand new house..so my mom said no that. We moved into a 1 bedroom budget suites...and once we lived there..I noticed my parents always closed the door..and we had to knock before coming in...now thinking they might be doing " adult stuff" it was just one night or anything..it was everyday of all hours of the day.. my parents would spend in the room with the door locked...my dad didnt work so he always in there..and my mom worked but she get off or didnt work..it was always in the room. Thats when I knew..I needed to talk to my nana...so I did. and she told my everything...told me everything that made her mad about them..why she blamed them..after that i couldn't trust my parents. I didn't want to hear their bullcrap lies...they started to notice my attitude toward them...and they blamed me for everything..judged me on the smallest things...I got into a fight with my dad one night..and he told he was tired of me and to ask to live with my nana ( mind you i was only 14 at this time) so i asked her and she said yes...well once I told them that she said yes.. my dad claimed to never say that ! and my mom went along with it ! a year went past..and moved from the budget suites...want to know why? because they stopped paying the weekly rent! for only one room! My nana wouldn't let my brothers and i sleep in the streets so she let us come stay with her...and guess what my parents said " we will only be here for a few day"well guess what.. few days turned into weeks...few weeks turned into months..and a few months turned into a year half living with them..My grandparents could deal with it anymore..how my dad wouldn't go to work..and let my mom work 2 jobs...and all he they would do sit up stairs in the guest room with the door closed ! they never payed a single bill for my grandparents while living there after a while..my uncle moved in because he needed a place to stay after he lost his wife..etc.. and my mom was happy with that..but learned to live with it after awhile..While my uncle lived there..he was so sweet to us and everything but one night my mom (i thought) opened up to me saying that she hates her life..and how her own mother blames her for being on pills...and she told me even if she was on pills her mother wont even help or send her for help...and I asked to be honest and tell me is she on anything..she looked me straight in the eye and told " I swear on my childrens life..im not anything" I believed her!...and I was so stupid for believing her.. after a while living in the house..guess what happens.. another fight breaks out ..agian ! just like it did 2-3 years ago ! and guess what we did...of we packed our things..and moved in with my dads mother !! hoping to get my father back in work....my grandma loved the company..until she started to notice the same thing that my nana notice...and you want to happen there??? another fight ! so we were kicked out..and we went to a emerald suites...we have been living here since march...and we are overdue in rent..my mom has gotten really skinny..and guess what?/ their door is closed 24/7 !! My mother promised me on everything she was not anything...but guess what i found ...money to a friend of theirs, and texts asking for more of the amount they got last time..that they are willing to pay extra ! my mom and dad have lied to my face..and im so tired of it ! Im talking to my nana ..and she has already told me I could leave...but I want to know...can I get taken from my grandparents house..if my parents call the cops on me because I left them? my brothers have the chance to leave..but they wont because they dont believe me..my parents never hit us..or anything...but they are liers and i cant stand the way we live now. we are being kicked out of the place tomorrow..with no where to go..my mom job is closing....we will probaly try and live with some one else...I just need to know....can i legally leave right now? with out their approval?? so i can live with my nana..finish high school and move on? I dont hate them.. I love them..just I can't live like this anymore..and Im tired of being stressed because of them..I wanted to tell you my whole story..so you don't think i am over dramatic 16 year old girl...hating her parents.. i turn 17 next month..so should I wait to leave or no?

  • #2
    re: I want a better life...

    Hello,
    Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like there is a lot of mistrust going on in your household that you are uncomfortable with. That must be pretty difficult for you to leave a place you’ve been comfortable with for so long, and leaving your friends. Moving often can be hard to get used to with all of the changes that come with it. Dealing with drug abuse in your household can be tough as well. It sounds like you have some complicated things going on. With that being said, that is understandable that you would want to leave where you are.

    We aren't legal experts and we are non-directive here so anything you decide is ultimately up to you. Generally speaking, if your parents file a runaway report and call the cops on your grandparents, you could be taken back to them. Your grandparents could potentially be charged with harboring a runaway. Your local non-emergency police would know more specifics about running away if you have questions.

    For further support, we strongly encourage you to contact us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), and look forward to your call. Lastly, please note that we offer a live chat via our website at www.1800runaway.org every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST.

    Good luck,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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