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i'm 16 and living with my toxic mom and siblings

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  • i'm 16 and living with my toxic mom and siblings

    so as I said i'm 16 and really wanna leave home because don't feel safe at home. my family believes that it's ok to abuse your kids physically, & verbally also we got into a big fight two days and I ran to my neighbors for help, so ever since then my family start to neglect me and now no one in the house talks to me and my mom does what ever she wants to my stuff even the ones she didnt pay for and when I start arguing with her she and my brother told that this is her and she ca do what ever she likes, and if i dont like it then i can get the ******** out of her house. I really dont want her or my brothers to go to jail, and i also dont want to go to foster homes because all the things I heard about them were bad. so please TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

  • #2
    Hello,
    Thanks for reaching out to us. We’re so sorry to hear that you’ve been feeling unsafe at home. It is never ok for anyone to be physically aggressive to you, and it sounds like you took steps to find a safe space with your neighbors. You’ve brought up a lot of really valid concerns regarding what might happen to your mom or brothers, and the condition of a foster home. We can’t tell you what to do, but we can review options you might have available to you.

    In your message, expressed concerns about your safety with your mom, and we want you to know that you have the right to live in a safe space. What you can do about your home situation really depends on what you might be comfortable with. If you have concerns that living at home makes you unsafe, one option is to reach out to your local child protective services to file an abuse report. It’s important to know that filing a report doesn’t guarantee that you would be removed from the home, and if you are removed from your family home, the local child protective services agency decides where you would go. What happens to your mom also depend on how your local agency addresses the situation, and might also depend on the laws in your state. If you’re interested in filing an abuse report, but you don’t know where to call, Child Help, available at 1.800.422.4453, as well as at www.childhelp.org , can help you identify your local agency. If you have questions about filing a report, or even if you just want someone to talk to, you can always reach out to us. We’re here for you no matter what you decide to do.

    Regarding what your brother said about you leaving your mom’s home if you don’t like the way things are run there, whether you can do that really depends on the laws in your state. We’re not legal experts, but from what we do understand, if you are considered a minor in your state, your parent or legal guardian is responsible for providing safe housing. If you’re considered a minor, and she kicks you out of your house, you have the option of reaching out to your local police department to let them know that your mom is refusing to house you, or has “locked you out” of your home. If you leave home without her consent, she can report you as a runaway to her local police department. Again, the laws can vary from state to state, and although we aren’t legal experts, what we know is that, generally, if she files a runaway report, and you are found by local police, they would return you home to her unless you inform them that it is unsafe to do so. In those cases, the local police might reach out to your local child protective services to try to find you a safe place, and again, any consequences for your mom would depend on the laws in your state.

    Whatever you decide, know that we are here for you. Please feel free to reach out to us. We’re available by phone 24/7 at 800.RUNAWAY (786.2929), everyday via chat from 4:30pm – 11:30pm CST. We can’t tell you what to do, but we will explore your options with you and help you figure out what steps you might be comfortable making. We’re here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!

    -NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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