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So I'm not getting along with my mom...

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  • So I'm not getting along with my mom...

    I'm honestly not even supposed to be on my computer for anything but school since I'm homeschooled but I really need advice and I'm scared.

    I came out to my mom and dad (who lives in a totally different state) as a transgender male and a bi-romantic. They seemed to take it really well and my dad accepted it and told my mom she needed to lay off a bit and give me room to grow. I felt safe, but my mom started getting all religious with me and told me that I was opposing our faith, when I know what I believe and I know I'm not going to be judged on my worries, and instead my heart, but shes pushing me away. I need time to think and breath away from her because shes too fast paced with our religion and I wan't to learn at my own pace. I don't want to be a phony person and fake who I am for God and instead I want to be humble and come as I am. So I asked my mom if I could go to my dad's house to finish my homeschooling since I'm getting anxiety and stress and I feel like it's getting in the way of my work and she said no because I'm only running away from the truth and my faith, and all I asked for is space. Then I felt guilt-tripped into believing I was hurting my little brother if I walked away but I never said I was leaving for good, I just need a couple of months to breath and grow up and decide if I want to have my own personal walk in faith and bond with my dad more as well, since she's had custody of me my whole life, and I'm 14 now.

  • #2
    RE: So I'm not getting along with my mom...

    Hello,

    Thanks for reaching out to us for help. It sounds like you are in a really tough situation. Coming out can be very stressful, and it sounds like your mother is having a difficult time accepting you and struggling with your identity and her religious beliefs. It sounds like this anxiety and stress is interfering with your education. That sounds really hard. You sound like a really strong person, and you deserve to have your gender identity and sexuality respected. It sounds like you would like to live with your father. If you decide to leave without your mom’s permission, she could file a runaway report with the police, who might force you to return home. Running away is not a crime, however anyone who allows you to stay with them could risk criminal charges for harboring a runaway. This means your father could get in trouble if you stay with him without your mom’s permission. Sometimes it can take a long time for parents to get over their initial feelings when a child comes out as trans. If you need someone to talk to, the Trans Lifeline might be a great resource for you. Check out http://www.translifeline.org/ or call (877) 565-8860. You can also reach out to us 24/7 if you need to talk about your options or get resources. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. We can even do a conference call with you and your mom if you need support while talking to her about this issue. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Thank you so much, I have talked to her since I posted and she said she would think about it. I'm going to talk to my dad sometime today as well so we can work something out to get me up there with him to finish my homeschooling in a healthier environment for me. I believe I'll be able to learn from the mistakes his children make (he has 5 sons up there, and since I'm a trans male I feel like I'll be able to fit in and be rough and tough with them) and while I learn from my mistakes I can learn better, stress less, and be given a little bit of space to figure out who I want to be, and give my mom some time to accept it.

      Comment


      • #4
        RE: So I'm not getting along with my mom...

        Thanks for getting back to us. It sounds like living with your dad might be a better situation for you right now. We are glad to hear that you are talking to your parents. If you ever need to talk about your situation or you need resources, we are here for you!

        Wishing you the best of luck,

        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          hi im a 12 year old girl and i want to run away, so if you know anything that would help, how did u do it plz reply

          Comment


          • #6
            re: So I'm not getting along with my mom

            Hello,

            Thank you for reaching out to us. We are sorry to hear that you aren't getting along with your mom. That must be a tough situation for you. We aren't legal experts and we are non-directive here so anything you decide is ultimately up to you. Being that you are a minor, there would be some legal issues that surround you running away. Do you think they would file a runaway report if you leave? If they do and you come in contact with the police, you may be taken back to your home. Your local police would know more specifics about that. If you would like to call us to discuss this further, you are more than welcome to do so.

            We hope we were able to explain a little bit about our service and how we can be of assistance. For further support, we strongly encourage you to contact us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), and look forward to your call. Lastly, please note that we offer a live chat via our website at www.1800runaway.org every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST.

            Best,

            NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment

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