I'm 18 and I wanna move out. My parents are overprotective.

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I'm 18, almost 19 and I am very unhappy where I live. I have two older brothers and both my parents here who live with me.
My brothers are both verbally abusive towards me and my mother. One of my brothers, 22, has been the more abusive and he gets physical sometimes with my dad. Since I was 12 I watched them scream and fight to the point that police were called.
My brother use to be physically abusive to me one summer when I was going into 7th grade. I've always been in the middle and can't walk downstairs without an argument happening between someone. I don't have any friends because of my brother.
I use to be suicidal and sometimes I still think about it. My mom doesn't seem to care very much as I have gone to a counselor outside of school and the counselor recommended to my mom that i see a psychiatrist. My mom didn't do anything. She thinks I don't need help and that I'm making up my emotions and the way I feel. I feel so unhappy because she doesn't wanna help me no matter how many times I've cried my eyes out to her that I need help. I use to cut myself and she pretended it never happened. I broke when I caught my mom smoking weed in the garage, as well as seeing text messages between her and my older brother, 28, asking to get her some more week. So basically my mom goes behind my back and lies to me. My dad doesn't know about that.

I sort of ran away once to my ex-boyfriend in california, but my mom didn't see it as running away. I have been so unhappy lately here and I cry all the time away from everyone. I always hide in my room. I have someone who's willing to let me live with them and we are good friends. She's married and lives a few states away from here. I don't know how to tell my parents that I want to move out. They're very over protective and they will block the door if i try to walk out. I'm trying to find a job so I can save up about a grand to send all my larger items and such to my friends house and then hop on a plane. Eventually when I get settled in, I can find a job there. I don't know what to do because my parents treat me like I'm a child, and they even tell me I'm still a child. I don't know what to do or tell anyone. I am just so unhappy.

[ccsmod14]

Re: I'm 18 and I wanna move out. My parents are overprotective.

Hi there,

Thanks so much for reaching out to us. It sounds like you have really had a difficult time at home and we’re sorry to hear about this. We’re glad that you reached out, we’re here to help.

You disclosed that you have thought about suicide in the past, and you still sometimes think about it, in addition to self-harming behavior. These are some really serious things to be working through alone. We want to let you know that you can call the National Suicide Hotline at any time that you are feeling like you want to end your own life at (800) 273 TALK. It sounds like you have utilized counseling services in the past. If this is something you’d like to explore again, you can call us here any time at 1800runaway and we can try to locate some services near you.

It sounds like you have left in the past and you would like to leave again. Because you are 18, you do have the right to leave and decide where you live on your own as you are a legal adult. We recognize that it’s not always that easy when you are not entirely independent yet. It sounds like you have a really good plan set up as far as saving some money before going to your friend’s house to stay a few states away. It sounds like your parents really care about your well-being which is really great. It might be easier to talk to your parents about your future plans with a third party present. This could either be a professional like a counselor or therapist, or maybe someone who is not in your immediate family like a close family friend or aunt or uncle; someone that could act as a mediator for this conversation.

Please do call or chat to talk more. We’re here 24/7 to help in any way that we can.

Best,
NRS