Help

[Guest]

I just turned 16 and I live in Illinois. My mom has recently become really mentally and emotionally abusive. She even went so far as to tell me that I use what happened to me in the past (me being molested) as a crutch and that I self-pity and victimize myself. She says I need to get beat and that I'm going to grow up to be nothing but stupid and ignorant. She even cancelled my trip that I've been waiting over a year for and am so close to actually going. That trip meant everything to me...She took away my phone and everything and won't let me talk to anyone who would actually take my side (AKA anyone). She turned my aunt and uncle against me by telling them false accounts of what happened. She physically shoved me on the stairs. I need o get away from there. But with limited ways of doing this, I don't know how. I read about emancipation but she would never agree to it and I don't know how to live alone and be financially alone. I don't have any family to live with either. Please help, i need to get out soon.

[ccsmod16]

Hi,

Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We’re glad you reached out today. That takes a lot of strength and courage to do. It sounds like you’re in a very painful and unsafe place right now both emotionally and physically. You don’t deserve to be treated the way you’re being treated now. The pain you experienced in the past is valid and you deserve support. There are options for you to get to a safer place in life. One option that you may want to consider is child abuse reporting. You can call and make a report, and they would send investigators to determine if you are being abused and, if necessary, get you somewhere safe. They can also work with your family on ways to make your environment safer. If that’s something you’re interested in, we can definitely help walk you through that process if you call us. There is also a hotline called “Comprehensive Community Based Youth Services” (CCBYS) and you or they can reach them by calling (877.870.2663) for more information. They also have some options as far as family mediation so if there are certain issues at home that are going on and preventing them from going home, that might be something that they can help with as well. They’ll take some information and refer to your local CCBYS agency and case worker that can walk through their services and what they can offer. Sometimes they will even send a case worker out to meet with the youth in person, so that’s always an option as well. Another resource that has more information on abuse and abuse reporting is called Child Help at childhelp.org. Their phone number is 1-800-422-4453.

It sounds like you’re also looking into emancipation. As for your concerns about your mother giving permission, that’s not required for emancipation. In Illinois, under the Emancipation of Mature Minors Act, a youth between 16 and 18 can become emancipated and must demonstrate to the court that they are mature, able to financially support themselves, and be able to live independently. We are not legal experts, so if you’d like more info on the details of that process, the Chicago Bar Association can provide referrals to lawyers. Their number is 312-738-9200. If money is an issue, feel free to call us and we can help with finding low cost legal aid in your area. We hope these resources can help with finding ways to get where you want to be. If you’d like to discuss you situation further and talk about how you’ve been feeling, or would like to set up a conference call with your mother where we can be on the line and help mediate the discussion, feel free to reach out to us by calling us at 1-800-RUNAWAY, or through our chat line at 1800runaway.org. We wish you the best.

We hope that information helps!