I hate my home, family and life

[Guest]

hi am emily and im a 15 year old girl seeking help and avdice. Am gonna start of by sayings than my family is composed od 5 children and im the eldest. My father used like slep me like not beat me up but he smetimes gave me some slaps when i would do sth wrong but then i told him that i was fed up nd that he had no right to touch me oor abuse me in any king of way so eventually he stopped . But then its not just aboul hitting me. The problem is that whenever i want to do sth my mom agrees but he doesnt wich fustrates me and confuses me at the same time , and am not saying that they dont let me out or anything because i do go out with friends often but i just feel that my parents dont understand me or understand things i believe in they basically want me to live by their beliefs wich am totally against .THANKS . AND ANY ADVICE ON HOW I CAN COMMUNICATE WITH PARENTS WITHOUT THEM GETTING MAD AND JUST IGNORING WHAT I HAVE TO SAY CUZ THEY THINK ITS WRONG OR THAT IM JUST A LOST TEENAGER WOULD BE VERRY APPRECIATED

[ccsmod10]

Hi Emily,

Thanks for reaching out to us, which we recognize can be very hard to do, but we're glad you did since we're here to help. It sounds like what you're going through must be very frustating, and it can't be easy feeling like you aren't being listened to.

You mentioned you were being slapped, and want you to know that it's just never ok to be hurt, even if it's slapping and nothing more. It's just never ok to hit a child, no matter what you've done. Keep in mind you have a right to report this, and we would also be able to help you with that. We are here 24/7 if you want to talk more about that at 1-800-786-2929, or even if you have someone else to talk to that could help also.

In terms of getting your parents to understand, sometimes really being very honest about how you're feeling can help. It's always possible they don't know just how it's really making you feel. Sometimes it can help also if there is another adult family around too that might know your parents. You could possibly talk to them and have them relay the message to your parents. Another option we have is conference calling, where if you called us, we could try and mediate between you and your parents and help you find a middle ground.

Somtimes it helps too to just find things to take your mind off things, such as listening to music, or playing sports. That's just something to keep in mind for when you're feeling those frustrating situations.

Hopefully we've provided options that might help. Just keep in mind again that we are here 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929 if we can be of any further assistance. Best of luck!

[Guest]

Hello.
I'm a 14-year old girl that lives with her mother, older brother and grandparents. My parents are divorced, my dad lives in another country and I see him maybe two weeks a year during which he is mostly on his phone and we all pretend that we are a normal family. My grandparents are strict and they barely even know me to be honest. My brother is arrogance in human form, who can't spend a day without mentioning how amazing he is. Even though he is controlling, selfish has zero empathy for other people (he told a gypsy woman who comes by our house ocassionally to get lost and stop asking for money even though he KNOWS that shes got a family of almost twenty hungry people that are just trying to survive) and he also has anger issues, constanly yelling and breakin things when not everything happens his way. My mother doesn't see any of this and always says that he's just funny and hardworking because apparently thats what matters. All the love I ever got from hes was dictated by how good my grades were. And even then there was only negative reaction to anything that wasn't an A and barely any reaction to an A. She doesn't care that I'm struggling with depression and anxiety and she knows that I used to cut myself. I can't remember the last time she asked me "How are you?" Or "Are you ok?" It's always "How was school?" "Did you get any grades?". Still, if she thought my grades were good we could at least try to act like a normal mother and daughter, something I enjoyed. This lead me to lie about my grades a lot and whenever she found out the truth all hell would break loose. Last year she kicked me out of the house for about 4 days and I came crawling back and apologising. Theres a possiblity that she's gonna kick me out again if things escalate a bit cause the tension here is unbelievable and I'm writing here because I need someone to tell me what my options are if I do end up homeless. Also, are your contacts available in all countries? (I can speak english, I just need to know if I can call you from Croatia.)

[ccsmod2]

Thank you for contacting us here at National Runaway Safeline. We are very sorry to hear about the issues with your family. Unfortunately we do not have any resources in Croatia. However, Child Help (www.childhelplineinternational.org) is a great resource for additional information and support.

[Guest]

Hello everyone i hate my home situation right now. My sisters or should i say sister always says things like its your fault i have no life because of you and more harmful stuff. Also my parents are fighting so i think they might get a divorce and i just really want to go away i have about 44 dollars but i just i want help because if i run away then my niece and my other sister would be super sad

[ccsmod10]

HI there,

Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear about your difficult home situation. Arguments and talks of divorce can be a lot handle, and it’s understandable that you would feel overwhelmed. It sounds like you have given some thought to how you would provide for yourself, but it’s also important to consider where you would stay, shelter, etc. We want to try and help as much as we can, but we would need more information. By calling or chatting, we will be able to get a better idea of your situation and can find ways to best help.

You can always reach out to us at 1800- RUNAWAY or via our online chat.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

My parents hate me they always pick on me no matter what I try my best the whole time but they rather pick my cousins than me ...I’m only 15 but they make me clean the house make dinner have the house spot less and dinner made before they get home.. they won’t let me out of the house I m not aloud to go house parties teenage discos or even if I get invited to a day out with friends they say I will be aloud to do all that when Im 18 and have my own money and house then I can do whatever I want ... if hurts seen my friends going town and haveing a bit of fun while I’m at home working my butt of and still don’t get appreciated .. I could make the whole house spot less but still when they come home get my head are off me because I missed one thing... always get compared to my perfect cousins .... what hurts the most is when I see my friends have such good relationships with their mom and could tell them literally anything..about boys.. about what happened in school and all that ... but I can’t because if I tell my mom I think that boys is cute I automatically turn into a slut and that I will be pregnant by the age of 16... that I won’t get anywhere in life .. that I’m uselesss...

[ccsmod1]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about everything that has been going on and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. Do you have anyone else in your life, like a family member or trusted adult, that can advocate for you to your parents? It can be difficult to have a conversation with your parents if they often get angry. Sometimes it can be helpful to have another adult around when you’re trying to talk to your parents so that they can stand up for you and try to keep the conversation calm and fair. That person could be a guidance counselor, other family member, or any other adult you trust. Here at NRS, we also offer a conference call service and can help you have that conversation with them. Our number is 1-800-786-2929. You can call us 24/7. We can also talk through other options you think you might have. You are not useless and there are people that want to listen and support you. Let us know how we can best help.

NRS

[Guest]

my parents got divorced when i was 7. it was ugly, i saw a lot of disgusting things (messages) no 7 year old should have to see and was subjected to numerous events with my dad that have really traumatised me. skipping a few years down the track, i’ve been bullied, pulled out of school, begun high school and still have issues with my dad. since they got divorced, i felt the only person i had was my mum. she was my best friend, at times my only friend and i felt okay with life because i knew she’d always be there. then she met someone, and my whole life took what felt like a turn for the worst. him, my mum brother and i aswell as his 17 year old son had moved in together within a few months of us meeting him, i felt ok with it because i wanted my mum to be happy so badly, i didn’t know that her happiness would result in my unhappiness. they got married a year later, it was a horrible year, his children were possibly the most nasty people i had ever met. they put us down, tried to get rid of us and did everything in their power to exclude us. home, wasn’t home, it was a prison. i began resenting my mum, she wouldn’t say anything, i had to defend myself and my brother. a big part of me felt so anger at her because the only reason my life was so horrible was because of her. all in all, a few months after they got married, the son who lived with us, tried to kill me. he hated my guys because i never put up with his crap, unlike everyone else. he got kicked out, but i suffered a lot more than i let on after that, i has constant night mares about him killing me. and i still get them occasional now, a year down the track. back to my mum, before she got remarried i KNEW my brother and i were her world because i felt it so strongly. her new husband became her world, everything was about him, he was all she cared about and she pretty much only hung out with me when he wasn’t around. i felt lonely, and like a worthless piece of backup material. i still feel like this now. i’ve tried so so so hard to try and not let it get to me, but the truth is i spend most nights crying myself to sleep because of how worthless and lonely i feel. i don’t have a best friend, and the one person who i considered my best friend, found a new one. she says to me my brother and i are her ‘number 1’ but i know that isn’t true because i wouldn’t feel this way if we were, and she wouldn’t act the way she does towards him. i don’t know what to do anymore. she’s a good person, but because of her i feel like i’m drowning in misery and loneliness. my dad has always prioritised his girlfriends over me aswell, and i just feel like i don’t really matter to anyone, i don’t want to live anymore. i feel as if there’s no point to life. i don’t want people to suffer and feel guilt if i die, but i just hate the way i feel all the damn time. i just want to be 18 already and get out of here, away from everyone and never know them again. a fresh start. please help me i have no one to talk to.

[ccsmod3]

Hello,

Thank you for reaching out to NRS! It takes a strong, brave person like yourself to tell your story and ask for help.

You mentioned that you feel alone and do not want to live anymore. Your life is valued more than you know, and you contribute so much to the world and the people around you. If you want to talk to someone about how you’re feeling, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a great resource (1-800-273-8255).

It sounds like it is really difficult to deal with the trauma of what happened with the son who lived with you. If you want to talk to someone about this calling the National Alliance on Mental Illness (1-800-950-6264) and the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, SAMHSA, (1-877-726-4727) are great resources. SAMHSA also provides resources for where you can get counseling in your area on their website, smhsa.gov.

You mentioned that you used to consider your mom your best friend, but it doesn’t feel like that anymore. It can be difficult to lose a strong relationship that you had and try to get it back. We have a conference calling service. You and your mom can both call in to our hotline, and we can mediate a conversation between you both. This can be helpful in allowing you both to communicate your feelings.

Thank you again for contacting us! You did the right thing by asking for help because your life is valued. If you need any more help or support, please do not hesitate to contact us. We are available by phone at 1-800-786-2929 and chat at www.1800runaway.org. We are confidential and 24/7.

Best of luck,

NRS

[Guest]

I hate to be in this world,life and family
Whats the purpose?Why do I need to waste my time?Why can't I have a place where I can call home?What is home?Eventho I does not exist that doesn't change anything.I am bored of this life.Is there any other world I can go other then this world?What is family?What is life?
I am currently 15 this year,until today,I don't know what I should do with my life,I don't know how to express my feeling...I only can ask my self questions,but I don't know how to elaborate or explain my feeling and problems,and I dont have anyone to share my feelings to.My results are dropping,my family problems are forcing and squeezing me,exams coming,I am cornered and I can feel the impact and force squeezing me from every directions while I am trying to use every strength to support and prevent it from collapsing.Whats the purpose?I keep asking myself this question .......

[ccsmod7]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are going through a tough time, but we are here to help. You mentioned school and family being stressful and feeling like you don’t have anyone to share your feelings and thoughts with. Naviagating school and family is difficult for many people- don’t hesitate to call us at the National Runaway Safeline. We are a 24/7 hotline and we are always happy to lend an ear and provide you with support and resources, like information for individual and family counseling services. You can reach us at 1-800-786-2929. You can also use our instant message service on our website, or consider talking to a trusted friend or family member, or a school counselor.

When you are a under a lot of stress, it can be helpful to make time for yourself to relax. You can do something you enjoy, like read a book or go for a run.
Again, thanks for reaching out- we are always happy to help. Consider giving us a call if you’d like to talk.

If you feel like you are a threat to your personal well-being, please consider caling the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1800-273-8255. You are not alone, and there are people and resources out there who truly want to help.

Best,

National Runaway Safeline

[Guest]

Hey i am 12 i know everyone on here has a pretty bad life and I am sorry for you. My life is the worst and my entire family hates me including the dog and I have no friends and I am fricking home schooled so I never get out of the house my sister is an angel to my parents I act like I am fine and happy but I am not i am depressed. And my brother hate me so much he calls me dumb f**k and little sh*t. He looks at like am the devil. My sister I get the blame for everything she does I hate my life so much

[ccsmod3]

Hi, thanks for reaching out to NRS tonight, we’re here to listen and to help. We’re really glad that you contacted us. It sounds like you’re going through a really rough time with your family – from feeling like your parents blame you for your sister’s actions / only see the best in her, to your brother swearing at you and calling you names.
Family relationships can definitely be hard to navigate, especially if you’re always in the situation and aren’t able to take a break from it. From what you’ve shared, it sounds like you’re at home even for schooling, making it difficult to have an opportunity to have friends/build a life outside of your immediate family members or to avoid feeling isolated.
You may want to consider talking to your parents about ways to change your situation – perhaps there is an opportunity to do activities outside of your home that you like, even if you’re home schooled – such as extra-curricular activities or joining a local club depending on your interests.
You may want to consider talking with your parents to let them know how you’re feeling and provide examples of where you feel you’re being treated unfairly. It can be a hard thing to tell someone how you feel – but the fact that you’ve come here to share what’s going on in your life is a testament to how strong you are. It takes courage to ask for help, and you’ve already shown that you have that.
Sometimes conversations with parents or family members can be easier if you have a neutral 3rd party present – by phone or in person. Maybe there is a trusted relative outside of your immediate family who could help you open up lines of communication with your parents to have that talk, and to help you communicate what you’re trying to say without a conversation devolving into a shouting match or hurt feelings. If not a relative, that’s a service we also provide on our phone lines – we could set up a conference call with you and your parents and be there for you to help keep the lines of communication open and productive/positive. Just give us a call on our hotline if that’s an option that sounds good for your situation.
You also mentioned being depressed, and we know that can be challenging at any age. Being able to acknowledge to someone else how you are feeling is the first step to getting the assistance you need. Depression is a serious medical condition, but there is help available. We can have a database of resources locally and nationally that may help, just call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY and we can help you find resources in your area. Or, you may find some assistance at SAMHSA (Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration), a national hotline that specializes in helping people of all ages with challenges like depression. Their number is 1-877-726-4727 or you could check them out online at www.smahsa.gov .
We hope this information has been helpful to you. Hang in there, and please know there are people here who want to help. Our phone lines are open 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY, please don’t hesitate to call if you’d like to explore some options further. Best of luck to you!
-NRS

[Guest]

I don't know where to start with anything. All I can say is that I don't think I can handle it much longer. I've been feeling hurt by my family since the age of 7. I never feel angry, only sad, but that's rare too. I'm good at acting happy, or at least I used to be. My acting skills have gotten worse and so has my situation. This summer has been hell. I am 11 and I'm not sure if I'm gonna be able to wait another 7 years to leave this house. People say that if you're in the lowest point in life then the only way to go is up and I believe it for a second, but then my life comes back at me with a shovel and already digging deeper. I don't know what to do, I don't know where to go, I don't know what to think, I don't know what to feel. And I need help but don't know how or where to get it from.

[ccsmod10]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out to NRS!

We are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. It can be very frustrating not knowing what to do or what your next step might be from this point on. It’s brave of you to reach out during your time of need.

It sounds like your family is taking a toll on your mental health and making it hard to live at home. If you ever want to try to talk to your parents about how she makes you feel, we offer conference calling services between youth and parents. We're here if you need our help calling and talking to her about changes you want to be made in the home. You do deserve all the opportunities for happiness. If you are thinking about running away and somewhere to stay, we can try to find a runaway shelter for you. We’re not legal experts but as a far as we know, you can’t be arrested for running away.

We’re here if you’d like to talk more about your situation. Our safeline is open 24/7. We also have a chatting service via our website, unfortunately, it is not always open. The best way to contact us would be to call in and talk with our trained liners.

Be well, NRS

[Guest]

I am 16 y/o. hate being here with my parents. We have never lived in a stable home. We have always been in and out of different homes, which means I’ve always been in and out of different schools. I’ve never showed and complaint but it has always been very hard. I’ve always been quiet. Being with them has always been wishy washy. My mom always shows signs that she doesn’t like me and only likes me when I have money. And she has treated me very unfairly since I could remember. My dad has always been nice at times but and has tried to make up for the way she treats me. But for the last few years I’ve been trying to deal with everything but it seems like every time I turn around I’m getting yelled at and called names by my parents for little reason. Even when I’m right I’m always wrong. I’ve tried to cut but it hurts, so that was a no go. I’ve also tried to ask them if i could stay with my grandparents but they have denied that. It has now gotten to the point where I feel like I can’t wait until college so I either wanna run away or commit.

[ccsmod15]

Thank you for reaching out to us at NRS. It takes great courage to reach out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out to us.
We are sorry to hear that you are going through such a stressful situation. It sounds like you are going through a lot of pain and that had lead you to think about hurting yourself. What you are going through is not your fault and you don’t have to go through this alone. We are here to support you through his hard time and your life matters. If you ever get these thoughts again you can always call 911, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK(8255) or check out https://twloha.com/ for help with self-harm resources. Talking to a therapist or seeing a psychiatrist can also be helpful in many situations. You can contact SAMHSA National helpline at 1-877-726-4727 and the National Alliance on Mental Illness (1-800-950-NAMI) nami.org and they can provide you mental health resources.

While we are not legal experts, just speaking generally if you are to leave home without their permission and they are to file a police report while running away is not a crime the police can bring you back home and whoever you are staying with could be charged with harboring a runaway.
Running away from home can be hard in many cases. It might be helpful to think about where you might stay, how you might pay for rent, food and other living expenses. Talking to other family members, friends, and school counselors can also be helpful.

Knowing when to ask for help and we are here to help you through this overwhelming time. This is not your fault and we are here to support you and there is a way out of this. You can also contact us at 24 hour confidential hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929) and we can listen to you, explore your options and provide any resources.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

I hate my step dad. He’s always talking crap about me and my family, has so sympathy , empathy, he’s careless, disrespectful, he’s cheating on my mom, and he’s disgusting

[ccsmod6]

Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that your step dad is mistreating you as well as your family. What you described sounds like an intense and difficult situation and we will do our best to help you figure out what options you might have. Because we don’t know the specifics, it might be a good idea to reach out to us on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY or on chat at 1800runaway.org so that we can talk more about what’s going on and what you can do.

[Guest]

Hi, so I have quite a situation at home. I’m 11 years olds and I want to move in with my aunt. At my house I feel targeted, abused, hated, etc. but at my aunts house I feel accepted, loved, cared about, etc. What do I do? I told my aunt about my situation, then she told my parents. My parents were furious with me. I really want to move in with my aunt. How can I?

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time right now. It is great that your aunt is there for you and it seems like they are being supportive. Ideally at home you should not feel abused, targeted and hated and we are sorry that you are feeling that way.
Any type of abuse is unacceptable and you do not deserve to be feeling like you are being abused. If you feel your safety is at risk you can call 911 and request help. If you would like to make an abuse report you can call Child Help at: 1800-422-4453. We know that sometimes making abuse reports can be scary, if you would like to call us we can help you make an abuse report.
Also another option is to talk to a school counselor about how you are feeling, sometimes talking to a professional about our feelings can help us. Also if you tell your school counselor about the abuse because they are mandated reports they would be required to report the abuse. So that is another option if you wish to report the abuse.
It is great that you have your aunt for support. You could try talking to your parents about allowing you to stay with your aunt, maybe you guys can come to an agreement. Because you are a minor if you were to leave home without your parents’ permission you could be considered as a runaway. We are not legal experts but in most cases if you were found the police would most likely bring you home.
If staying with your aunt is not an option for you at this time you could try to come up with coping skills to help you in your situation. If there are hobbies you enjoy, you could try doing the hobbies you enoy more often. Also sometimes writing in a journal can help you feel better as well.
We hope this information will help you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to discuss the situation in further detail please give us a call we are here 24/7.
Best of Luck!
NRS

[Guest]

I hate my life. That's simple. And my nana and family is the cause of it. My nana and family is constantly yelling at me. They call me things like, idiot, stupid, unwanted, bunch of cuss words. My friends try to help but they can't. Whenever I find something like dancing or singing, that I like to do, they always shut me down and tell me how bad I am at it. She calls me so many things. She treats a monkey with more respect than she would to me. She calls me fat, and a bunch of other things I don't want to say. I've been on so many diets, I've even just about starved myself. I've almost cut myself. I've done many things that I New I shouldn't have done because of her. Today is the day where I can't handle this any more. And it's not like I can confront her, I've done it before and she lied. I don't know what I should do.

[ccsmod6]

Hi, thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We’re so sorry to hear what you’re going through with your family. Everyone deserves to feel safe and loved at home, and your nana’s behavior is not okay.
Based on the things you mentioned, there are a couple of great resources that may be able to support you, including the National Eating Disorder Association at 1-800-931-2237 or www.nationaleatingdisorders.org, and To Write Love on Her Arms at www.twloha.com or by texting TWLOHA to 741741.
It also sounds like you are experiencing verbal abuse from your family. If you would like to learn more about what this means or file an abuse report, you can call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453 or go to www.childhelp.org.
You mentioned your friends and how they try to help. Is it possible for you to go over to their places even just for an afternoon or a night when things are really bad at your house? Other options might include talking to a trusted teacher or guidance counselor.
Our priority is for you to stay safe. Please don’t hesitate to reach out again if you need more help. You can call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us online at www.1800runaway.org. Best of luck with everything.